Irony on the rocks with a twist...

Irrational Doom: How U.S. Drug Policy continues to do more harm than good

2007-10-12T12:23:00.000-07:00

“Those who forget the past are doomed to repeat it.” -Satayana

At midnight on January 16th 1920, the 18th Amendment, also known as the Volstead Act, went into effect, making the manufacture, distribution, sale, and consumption of intoxicating alcohol illegal in the United States of America. What followed was a decade of explosive criminality, a black market of illegal booze flowed from every border, port, and bathtub. Illegal “speakeasies” sprung up overnight. Violent clashes between rival gangs of bootleggers, the mafia, and police caused unimaginable dangers far greater than the imbibing of alcohol. Despite its good intentions to protect public health, and well-being, the “…Cure proved far more dangerous than the disease.” After 13 years of abysmal failure, the 18th Amendment was repealed by the 21st allowing those suffering from the woes of The Great Depression the right once more to legally drown their sorrows.

Despite the rather obvious lessons learned from the “grand experiment” of the 18th Amendment, the U.S. has consistently failed to apply these lessons to developing a sane and rational approach to drug policy. Prohibition has demonstratively proven that it doesn’t work. By rendering the production, distribution, sale, and consumption of certain substances, illegal, the U.S. government has merely driven them underground, promoting the formation of a criminal black market, drastically inflated their profit potential, and done absolutely nothing to prevent the same set of tragic consequences that go along with failures to learn from the past.

As of 2003, the affects of continued prohibition of drugs in the U.S. results in the average annual arrest of 1.5 million citizens, and another 400,000 incarcerated, for non-violent drug crimes; still another 1 million citizens remain on probation. The annual cost of drug prohibition at the federal level is nearly 20 billion dollars a year. The combined costs of U.S. drug policy on state and local governments, as-well-as the loss of tax revenue due to non-regulation, is easily in the billions of dollars per year.

U.S. drug prohibition law consumes 50% of all trial court time and requires the full time efforts of about 400,000 law enforcement officers, despite the fact that their efforts could be better utilized policing violent crimes and terrorism. The one-time cost to secure U.S. ports from smuggled nuclear weapons is estimated to be 2 billion dollars. The amount the U.S. has allocated to this vital security need: 93 million dollars. The amount of money the United States government spends annually to “protect us” from just marijuana: 4 billion dollars.

The United Nations currently values the international drug trade at approximately 400 billion dollars. It makes up about 8% of all international commerce. Far from inhibiting drug trafficking, current U.S. drug policies actually encourage the production, distribution, and sale, of illegal drugs. Estimates on the return-on-investment for involvement in the illegal drug trade, ranges anywhere from 5,000-20,000%. The U.S. led prohibition on global drug trafficking has made it so profitable that criminal cartels, impoverished nations, and even terrorist organizations, have all used them to provide funding for their various operations.

U.S. policy makers go so far to distort the truth concerning drug use in the U.S. to promote their wasteful tactics that it is unethical, immoral, and unconscionable. Anti-drug programs promote the belief that the “casual user” is a myth, and that all users regardless of choice, or consumption, should be considered “criminal addicts,” and treated as such. There have been no studies backed by the U.S. government which have ever honestly addressed the differences between those who freely choose to occasionally use mind-altering substances and those whose addiction leaves them little choice but to use them. The prevailing assumption seems to be there is no rational division between responsible casual use in the privacy of one’s own home, and abuse that constitutes a threat to public health and safety.

The highly encouraged perception that all drug users are “junkies,” is so widely accepted as truth that no other distinctions need be applied. If caught, so-called “mythical” casual users can expect to suffer far more harsh consequences than do addicts (because at least addiction is viewed upon as a “disease”). Cigarettes and alcohol, both of which are highly addictive, have no known medicinal purposes, yet they continue to enjoy broad legal government sanction, whereas marijuana, a non-addictive plant that is widely considered to have at least some medicinal benefits, does not.

The prohibition of alcohol turned many responsible adults, who occasionally enjoyed a few drinks, into “dangerous criminals.” Current drug policy in the U.S. revisits the same nightmare upon millions of responsible adults, who risk having their homes raided by police, their property seized, pay hefty fines, the loss of employment, face incarceration, and wind up with a criminal record, just to enjoy a few hours of a pleasure that doesn’t give them a headache the next morning. Worse still, people suffering from debilitating chronic pain, nausea, and terminal illnesses are denied the opportunity to increase the quality of their lives by the same irrational standards.

The continued stance of the U.S. with regards to drug policy is made even more farcical by the legal regulation and sale of alcohol and tobacco products, both highly addictive and proven to be dangerous to overall public health (the ultimate irony is that polls of high school age children demonstrate they have far greater access to marijuana than they do alcohol and tobacco precisely because it is regulated). Throughout the 20th Century, U.S. drug policy has never been guided by anything resembling rational sense, and it has gotten worse since the 21st. Government officials and anti-drug organizations continue to ignore the facts by continuing to try and legislate a change of attitude, wasting hundreds of billions of taxpayer dollars, ruining countless lives, straining our legal system, and providing profit-motives for thugs, impoverished nations, and terrorists, the world over.

The facts so many refuse to face is that continued drug prohibition has proven itself an irrational boondoggle that has served as a drain upon scarce resources at every level of our government. The only sane course is legalization, regulation, and taxation of most currently illegal drugs. This would provide additional funding to promote social change, education, and treatment for drug addition, while allowing those who would choose to use drugs privately, safely, and responsibly, the right to do so without fears of prosecution. Legalization would also undercut the efforts of criminal organizations, impoverished nations, and terrorist organizations, seeking to use drug smuggling as a means of profit.

The lessons we have learned from history and economics concerning smuggling of illegal substances demonstrates quite clearly that, as long as there is a demand, there will be a supply. By driving up the risks associated with the drug trade, all drug prohibition will ever succeed in doing is increasing its profitability at the expense of the people. The time is long overdue for a sane drug policy; one that does not promote a criminal underground, one that does not provide huge profit motives encouraging its proliferation, and one that clearly separates responsible drug use in the privacy of one’s own home from irresponsible drug use that constitutes a danger to others.

For more up-to-date information on how much of your money is being spent and more on the "War on Drugs," click here

Some factual data on the "drug war" paraphrased from The End of Faith, by Sam Harris

TANSTAAFL!

©J.S.Brown 2004-2007

To suffer the fate of the Foolish

2007-02-06T22:08:00.000-08:00

I’m tired. I’m tired of watching the lockstep two-party three-ring circus spectacle that is American politics. I’m tired of watching the fraudulent show played out for the benefit of keeping people hopelessly divided, while those in power seem more interested only in their own enrichment than they do in the people they supposedly serve.

I’m tired of the “same old new direction” in Iraq, a questionable invasion and occupation, that has gotten us more than three thousand dead, tens of thousands wounded (and who really knows how many Iraqi civilians killed and maimed). Most of all, I’m tired of everyone putting up with the callous indifference of George W. Bush and his supporters. The decision to go ahead and make the total blunder in Iraq bigger than it already is, despite the advice from seasoned statesmen, career military strategists, members of Congress from both sides of the aisle, and the referendum this past November from the American people, demonstrates there is far more than merely a lack of competent leadership in the White House, it demonstrates that these people just don’t give a damn what anyone else thinks.

I’m also tired of hearing the same spineless talk from Democrats, who seem determined to demonstrate their “November mandate” through their sudden willingness to do “The will of the people,” simply because enough folk finally realized that the Neocon dominated GOP wasn’t the least bit interested in what they wanted. If they haven’t always been so, it is obvious that the majority of American politicians have become little more than whores, selling their love and affections to anyone with enough money to pay their rates, unfortunately, lower and middle class Americans simply can’t afford them, so they get ignored. A promise from a politician is of no greater or lesser value, than love from a prostitute.

If the Democrats in Congress truly wanted to show the American people they mean business, they will jettison all their self-serving platitudes, which probably have greater chance of inflicting vicious paper cuts, than in changing the long ago made decisions concerning White House policy. It should be noted that the U.S. Constitution gives Congress the authority to make war, fund war, and in instances where it is necessary, charge the Executive Branch with “High Crimes and Misdemeanors,” of which this citizen holds both Bush and Cheney to be guilty
“…Beyond a reasonable doubt.”

There comes a time when the only way to repair a damaged, or faulty structure, is first to dismantle it and then rebuild it. Failing in this, such a structure will inevitably collapse in on itself. This structure and fabric that has held this nation together through 230 years is sagging, and no matter how many times they are repeated, denials will not keep it from falling. It is up to all of us to either unite against those who would ruin this nation for their own gain, or remain divided, only to watch it fall.

When the “political sharks” on the Right smell blood, they don’t make empty postures, flailing about like helpless minnows, touting “non-binding resolutions.” They do not plead with their opposition to stand still, so they can more easily rend the flesh from their bones, they charge in with the precision of thousands of years of absolute instinct, and they show no mercy. The time will come when it will be too late for action, and any who survive the slaughter will be looking around for someone to blame. The inevitable frenzy of finger pointing will not make any difference, for reality will not change; the dead will still be dead, the missing limbs blown off by roadside bombs will still be gone, and the only place the guilt and shame will be evident is in the mirror.

Let the ideals set forth and signed by our forefathers on July 4^th, 1776 be read and spoken aloud once more with pride, passion, and enthusiasm, as a testament to the indomitable will, and spirit, that bore a nation. For if Congress proves itself unequal to the task of reminding the President and Vice-President to whom they are accountable, it becomes the duty of the American people to remind Congress of that very same notion; otherwise, it may as well serve as our only epitaph:

“…We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness. --That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed, --That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government…”

TANSTAAFL!

©J.S.Brown 2004-2007

Bush Turns Iraq into Political Albatross

2007-01-13T05:53:00.001-08:00

Bush Sells America Out Yet Again – Iraq to gain 20,000 More U.S. Troops to use as Targets

In a nationally televised address to the American people, President George W. Bush proved beyond a shadow of a doubt the sheer depth of his ineptitude by announcing plans to send a “force surge” of 20,000 more troops to Iraq. This completely predictable decision not only defies logic, but Bush’s own military advisors don’t support it; most troops already on the ground in Iraq don’t support it, the democrats do not support it, even members of his own party are divided over it. If this wasn’t enough to give the President pause for consideration, perhaps the fact that he doesn’t even have the support of the majority of the American People, for whom he supposedly “serves.” Alas, never to be the one who caves into advice, nor political pressures, not even the demands of the people he serves, nothing shall deter Bush from his self-anointed role as: “The Decider.” Had all those mindless drones who voted for him (many twice) bothered to check his credentials before 2000, they would probably be puking from the irony that W’s only true talent in life lies in his absolute inability to make an intelligent, well-reasoned, and cohesive, decision on his own, (although he does seem to show skill in the area of running up debts and getting people killed).

The U.S. invasion Iraq was a complete failure even before it began. It does not bode well for politicians to base an unprovoked military invasion of a sovereign nation upon a series of ethical blunders predicated by a deep seeded obsession to morph the invasion and occupation of Iraq into the greater “War on Terror,” such as: “cooking prewar intelligence,” telling a complete pack of lies, and the absolute failure to properly plan for the inevitable chaos that occurs when one topples a government. These vast failures have gotten Americans and Iraqis killed folks. Bush’s justifications for the Iraq incursion was focused solely upon spinning a relentless succession of phantom fears and menaces, and the American people bought it. We have nothing to show for our dead, and the Iraqis have at least as many graves to dig as they did before we invaded.

It should be noted that basic military strategy dictates that an invading military and occupation force must do everything in its power to win the hearts and minds of the people in the country they invade, otherwise, all they are doing is inviting partisans, counter-insurgents, and anyone else in the neighborhood that may have a grudge, to start attacking them by any and all means necessary (note the striking similarities between this scenario and what’s been happening in Iraq). A failure to win the hearts and minds of the people isn’t going to be corrected by adding troops; it’s only going to make the enemy that much more determined to make remaining in place unbearable for the troops on the ground, and the families at home watching them on TV. Thanks to the policies of President Bush, not only is our nation less safe than it was six years ago, but the world at large is far less safe. When a leader makes poor decisions that affect the lives of millions of people and nobody , it is bad enough, when that leader continues to make poor decisions after just about everyone around him has advised against it, that’s downright dangerous.

For far too long, it seems, Bush has surrounded himself with “yes-men,” who have told him only what he wanted to hear and did not bother him with any “troublesome facts.” People who voiced dissent, or wouldn’t “play ball,” were ever-so-quietly shown the door. Objecting or voicing opinions concerning policy decisions seems to be frowned upon in the Bush Administration. Bush himself admitted he didn’t bother watching the news, or reading the newspaper, because his staff told him all he needed to know. This is the beginning of the kind self-deceptive denial that can cause even great men to become megalomaniacs, imagine what this does to a not-even mediocre man, whose only claim to fame is having been born into a prosperous, powerful, and influential family with a checkered past? It is not difficult to see that not only was Bush the wrong person for the job seven years ago, but he has demonstrated a serious lack of leadership, class, and style, since then. Bush has permitted Iraq to become his “Political albatross,” and he seems determined to hang himself with it. So be it.

In essence, Bush’s failure in Iraq is part of a much larger historical misconception that has plagued U.S. foreign policy in the Middle East for nearly 50 years: political expediency and military strategy are totally incompatible with one another. In order to successfully invade another nation, one must “Win the hearts and minds of the people.” This is impossible when the politicians in charge don’t take into account the consequences of cultural, tribal, and religious differences in the battle plan before they order the invasion. Most troubling is the fact that most of our elected officials haven’t troubled themselves to discover the difference between a Sunni and Shiite. It also doesn’t take any sort of military genius to figure out that occupying another nation is bound to breed the kind of insurgency we’re experiencing in Iraq; if nothing else, the insurgency our troops faced in Vietnam should have taught us this lesson (oops, I forgot, Bush “skipped” that war).

The more I consider just how stark and dismal Bush’s failures have been, the more his willingness to buck everyone who believes more troops can’t solve this problem troubles me. The situation in Iraq started out bad and has never gotten better. Giving our enemy more targets to shoot at and blow up seems ludicrous to any right-thinking human being. My greatest fear is that this asshole may just be willing to sacrifice more American lives in a vain attempt to stave off the inevitable withdrawal from Iraq until 2008, so he can dump the problems he created on his predecessor. Bush’s invasion of Iraq was not only illegal, but his justifications were pure fabrications. Our subsequent occupation of Iraq has degenerated into a civil war with our troops caught in the crossfire. Bush’s latest strategy in Iraq has little chance of doing anything but getting more of our people killed. It is time to pull our troops out of harm’s way and let the Iraqi people settle their differences the way they’ve been doing it for thousands of years. It is time for Congress to stand up and remind George W. Bush that being President does not give him unlimited powers, that he is answerable to the other branches of government, and ultimately, the American people, for his continued poor judgment in Iraq.

TANSTAAFL!

©J.S.Brown 2004-2007

It’s a Brand New Day: Big Pharma, Big Promises, (and those little White Lies in the fine print)

2007-01-10T01:45:00.000-08:00

This has been bothering me for some time, and while we wait with breathless anticipation for Bush to announce his “new/old/same” plan for cleaning up his mess in Iraq, I thought I’d take a moment to ask a question: Do the warnings of possible side-effects provided during all those annoyingly wholesome and carefree prescription drug commercials make anyone else (besides me) cringe?

They promise the world, everything from lowering the bad cholesterol (while maintaining the good), managing those pesky genital herpes outbreaks, growing back your lost hair, stopping indigestion (while healing the damage), diminishing seasonal allergies, not letting asthma ruin your day, and even giving you and your partner up to 36 hours to get your groove on. It sounds too good to be true when they play that upbeat music and show those images of people having so much fun. See all the people who are getting back to doing the things they used to do before they got older and you could be one of them! Then of course they have to go and ruin the ride (thanks to the U.S. Government, no doubt) by mentioning a few “rare-but-potentially-serious” side-effects:

"Common side-effects are generally mild, and may include: headache, stomach pain, dizziness, sweats, vomiting, and diarrhea, and in rare cases: insomnia, halitosis, unusually colored discharge during sexual activity, shingles, hives, and may produce a slight tendency to drool (they don't show anyone suffering from these "common-but-rare" side-effects in the commercials, so I guess I'm probably safe, right?)"

"Women who are pregnant, or may become pregnant should not handle [prescription name here] as they have been associated with a rare birth defect (yeah, like this makes a person feel real good about taking that pill)."

"Seek immediate medical attention if you experience an erection lasting more than four hours (by which time, most men will have become completely addled by a nearly complete lack of oxygen to their brains)."You shouldn't drink in excess with [insert prescription name here] (as your brain may swell up like a watermelon, and reality may start to be a real downer)."

"Tell your doctor about any liver or kidney problems you may have (as this may increase your risk of these organs exploding and causing severe hemorrhaging, even death)."

"Tell your doctor if you have high blood pressure, or are taking nitrates for chest pains, as taking [prescription name here] could lead to a sudden drop in blood pressure (which could really ruin your whole day)."
"Do not drive, or operate heavy machinery, until you know how taking [prescription name here] will affect you (and of course most people are likely to pop a few pills, before they drive in a NASCAR race, play with a backhoe in their back yard, or take their space shuttle for a spin). "

Personally, I believe these commercials were far better before the Feds started mandating all the risks and side-effects be mentioned. Let people have that moment of hope and delusion that some biochemical concoction will cure whatever ails them, let their doctor be the one who gets to whack them over the head by telling them all the potential risks and side-effects (somehow I’m sure Big Pharma would agree).

It seems to me that the cures are as bad as the diseases. Rather than hassle with all those doctors and prescription pills, I say take 3 bong hits, suck down a half-dozen raw oysters, chase it with a shot of top-shelf bourbon, and top the whole thing off by eating a few cloves of garlic (if there's anything still wrong with you after that, you're pretty much beyond any hope).Oh, and don’t call me in the morning (‘cause I’ll be out doing all those things I used to do before I got all those things I needed all those fancy prescriptions for).

TANSTAAFL!

©J.S.Brown 2004-2007

Presidentially Yours – A Rant: The American Middle Class gets taken for a ride…Again

2007-01-02T17:51:00.000-08:00

I admit it; I’ve made mistakes in my life. Not only have I made multiple blunders, but I’ve actually tried very hard to learn from them and not make the same mistakes twice. Even Bill Clinton admits to fucking up, and perhaps this is the only redeeming quality of his presidential legacy, such that it is. In contrast to this, Bush and his pals seem convinced that they don’t make any mistakes. It makes me wonder how they could learn anything useful about fixing the myriad of problems this country faces when they can’t even admit to the fact that they are the primary cause for leading this country to its ultimate ruination.

My father is of the opinion that the only “legacy” of the Bush Administration will be cutting taxes for the wealthy and getting people killed. Perhaps if only they could kill the wealthy, we might have an outside chance of balancing the budget with the still in-place estate tax.

Honestly, no president has truly addressed the horrid welfare problem we have in this country. The government, in our name, has given more of our tax dollars to corporations who don’t need it; and foreign powers just so they’ll pretend to be our friends (most of who have laughed all the way to the bank and stabbed us in the back when we weren’t looking). If even half this money was turned back over to WE THE PEOPLE, maybe the U.S. wouldn’t still be an economic sinkhole of debt owed to China, and other dubious sources.

Bush and most of his closest cronies have truly never known want; they’ve always been members of the “haves.” They probably see the “have-nots” as a flock of weak sheep that need a shepherd, and they know just the men for the job. As Hunter S. Thompson probably would have said: “This is politics Bubba, and politicians don’t give a damn about anyone but themselves.” The Bushites have demonstrated that incompetence in government is a great way to keep the people occupied whilst they rape and pillage the euphemistic “American Dream,” and nobody really wants to know the full nature of the greed, corruption, and power mongering, that goes on behind the scenes. We all pretend that it doesn’t matter, and that somehow we’ll manage to get our own little “sliver” of that “American pie.”

Most of us go through our daily grinds oblivious to what’s really going on. We watch “the show” in the peripheral of the daily news, which meticulously sifts and filters what we get to see most carefully, so we never get a “true picture” of the filth we wallow in like pigs in shit. Perhaps they do it because they are in league with the politicians, perhaps they do it because calculated misery on local and national news gains more attention than an obscene animal sex show at a Tijuana titty bar (more than likely its a little of both and then some). Whatever the reasons, the spectacle is like driving by a bad car accident and feeling that irresistible urge to gawk at the carnage.

Folks, these people don’t give a rat’s ass about us. They feed us lines that appeal to our political leanings like snake oil salesmen selling “cure alls.” They would lie to their mothers, steal their stockings, and sell them to someone else’s mom, if it would get them just one more vote. They make dirty deals with the lowest forms of life (usually fellow lawyers like themselves) and at the end of the day, they count themselves lucky not to worry about social security, medical insurance, or whether or not they have a hot meal and a place to lay their heads at night. Most of these jokers don’t know what it is like to have virtually nothing in their savings accounts and live from paycheck-to-paycheck. How can they hope to solve problems they know nothing about, and why do we let them fool us over and over again? Because we desperately want to believe them; anything else would lead to anarchy, lord kows we just can't have that.

I have always believed that Politics is the show produced by economics. I wonder when it was that politicians realized it was far more rewarding to cater to the smaller portions of our society who actually have money, than it ever was to cater to the people that the U.S. Constitution says they are supposed to serve. Perhaps this was the gig all along, and the most of us were always just along for the ride. Who knows? What we do know is that the Bush administration legacy is one mostly of failure to listen, failure to work with all levels of society, and failure to admit that they’ve even failed.

TANSTAAFL!

©J.S.Brown 2004-2007

The People have spoken, and President Bush still isn’t listening

2006-12-28T10:36:00.000-08:00

I think we can put to rest any lingering doubts we may have that George W. Bush is completely delusional. Apparently, the mid-term elections were a loud and clear message to everyone else except the President, so let me be crystal clear:

Mr. President, the 9/11 attacks happened on YOUR watch. You and your people failed to respond to credible intelligence indicating an attack was imminent. You bear the responsibility of this failure. Unfortunately, it was only the first of many failures perpetrated by you and your administration.

Mr. President, the American people do not want another “new direction” for Iraq, we want OUT of Iraq. There was never any threat there, and you’ve botched everything since.

Mr. President, the American people are not happy with your flagrant disregard for the laws and Constitution of this nation. We are not happy that you broke the law multiple times to spy on Americans, we are not happy that you have granted yourself the authority to use signing statements that determine what laws you will follow and how you will follow them. This is not a dictatorship, it is a representative democratic-republic, and you are not above the law.

Mr. President, the American people are not happy with your handling of the economy. We are not happy with corporate welfare, we are not happy with jobs leaving to go elsewhere, we are not happy with wage increases that are still far below what they were before you took office. We are not happy that you, and your cronies, have catered to Big Oil, Big Pharma, and other corporate interests, to the determent of the American people.

Mr. President, the American people are not happy that you continue to ignore the signs of global warming all around us. Whether because you are bowing to the short-term profiteering of your Big Oil friends or whether there is some other ulterior motives involved, we want something done to protect the future of our world, our nation, our children, and our race.

Mr. President, if you cannot face the truth and act accordingly, then you do not deserve to serve as our President and should immediately resign and take your pack of lying dogs with you. The American people have spoken, and once again, you have failed to listen.

TANSTAAFL!

©J.S.Brown 2004-2006

Keeping Our Eyes on the Ball; as yet another Political Scandal Rocks Congress

2006-10-03T22:32:00.000-07:00

The latest revelations of Representative Foley’s sexual desires for young boys is really nothing new in a country that seems constantly in search of new ways to shock and disgust itself. If history has taught us anything, its that the mindless accumulation of power has the same sorry outcome in every case, no exceptions: sooner or later, those who become powerful begin to feel that they are no longer bound by the same ethics, morals, and laws, which most of us follow as a matter of conscience. Lord Acton said it best: “Power corrupts, and absolute power corrupts absolutely.”

First of all, the whole gay/pedophile misnomer will obviously get some unnecessary reinforcement from the fallout, and it is very likely that Speaker of the House, Dennis Hastert will more than likely have to step down, but amidst all the good news for Democrats concerning the rabid, power-mad, GOP's in Congress, we must remember that far worse has already gone on and it's barely made a ripple among the staunch loyalists on the right, who will sell their own grandmothers to the devil in order to keep believing in the "righteousness" of their cause. No matter what happens, no matter how many scandals rock the right, they still have a position, they still have a message, and they can still make the politicians on the left look like a bunch of divided, indecisive losers, who are so afraid of their own shadows that they can’t even come up with anything resembling viable alternatives to counter them.

What it comes down to is whether or not your loyalties are to We The People of The United States, or to a political party based upon unrestrained corporate greed, lust for power, and, above all, money. The latter brings out the worst in people, just as Rep. Foley has clearly demonstrated. These people have gotten so used to having so much power for so long, that they have come to think of themselves as "untouchables." It is up to all of us as citizens of this nation, to set this right, and I harbor serious doubts as to whether or not we're up to the challenge. Most Americans will accept the simplest, easiest-to-swallow, explanation that allow them to continue to function as they always have, and to keep believing what they want to believe, for as long as they can, because the alternative, to change their points-of-view and take a stand against tyranny, is too much for many of them to bear (what I wouldn’t give to be wrong in my beliefs).

Yet I find myself thinking that this is just another in a long line of "distractions" that comes at such an opportune moment, it makes me question whether or not there is an ulterior motive involved (I have long since come to conclude that there is no such thing as coincidence in politics). This scandal may well be intended to give those of us who despise the Bushites, and everything they stand for, a sense of false hope; or at least keep us from having a far deeper debate on the really important issues affecting this nation: the economy, jobs with lower pay and no benefits, the disastrous war in Iraq, the totally phony “War on Terror," and the continued willingness of so many, both in and out of our government, to sanction the absolute criminal behavior emanating from the White House itself. Dare I say that Karl Rove probably loves this sort of spectacle for the very reason that it will keep the focus away from the disastrous failures of our "Puppet-in-Chief," and those around him?

These guys are every bit as slick as they are smooth, if we're not careful, they'll find a way to "spin" this to their advantage. We must not allow ourselves to lose sight of this fact. We must be wary, we must be vigilant, or they could very easily steal yet another election out from under us. Anyone who attains the level of power these folks have will never give it up willingly, they must be forced to do so, or everything our beloved republic stands for will continue to be for sale to only those who can afford the price of admission, and most of us aren’t in that club, and we never will be.

Now is the time for us to put aside our anger, our thoughts of revenge, our various single-issues, and stand united against a common foe, a foe that has proven itself quite capable of changing the facts to fit their agenda, shuffling the issues to drive us apart, using fear to build support, and above all, ruthlessly suppressing any notions that there are alternatives to their points of view. Now is the time for us to act, before it is too late to save our nation from the ever rising tide of right-wing fascism that threatens to engulf it.

TANSTAAFL!

©J.S.Brown 2004-2006

Blowing in the Wind: The Bush Government Lets Us down about 9/11 Dust

2006-09-18T20:07:00.000-07:00

We all remember the images of Wall Street opening a week after 9/11, of the search and recovery efforts at Ground Zero, of men and women returning to workplaces coated with fine grey dust, and schoolchildren going back to public schools in Lower Manhattan. Now this corporate/government "rush to return to normalcy" plan has brought upon us yet another burden for us to bear, proving once again that our government, and multinational corporations, care more about their profit margins than they do about human beings.

It turns out that the first responders, search and recovery, investigators, students and workers at nearby buildings, cleanup crews, and students at lower Manhattan schools, near Ground Zero weren't given adequate warnings, or protection against the hazards of the dust, and now thousands of them are coming down with lung ailments, heart ailments, organ failures, even cancer and they are being run through the "Bureacuractic Denial Factory" by both the Feds, and New York State governments as they try to get them to pay for their mounting medical problems:

A study to be published in the February edition of Environmental Science and Technology shows the dust released by the collapse of the World Trade Center may not prove as dangerous as previously thought.

The study, funded by the American Chemical Society, found that 99 percent of the dust particles in the cloud were greater than 10 microns in width – large enough to get stuck in the upper respiratory tract and thus be quickly expelled.

"In the early part of the event, people were exposed to a very complex mixture of dust and smoke," said Dr. Paul Lioy, associate director of the Environmental and Occupational Health Sciences Institute, run by Rutgers University and the University of Medicine and Dentistry of New Jersey. Lioy is one of the principal authors of the study.

http://www.disasternews.net/news/news.php?articleid=1694

“An estimated 40,000 rescue and recovery workers were exposed to caustic dust and airborne toxic pollutants following 9/11,” says Philip Landrigan, of the department of community and preventative medicine at Mount Sinai.

The study is the largest conducted so far, involving 9500 workers at ground zero. It found that almost 70% of these had a new or substantially worsened respiratory problem as a result of breathing in dust from the collapsed buildings. One-third had diminished lung capacity.

http://www.sqlspace.com/9-11-responders-still-struggling-to-breathe-easy-vt34270.html?start=0&postdays=0&postorder=asc&highlight=&sid=08aab0434f0679f67ff6443d55876b55

Nearly seven out of 10 Ground Zero workers have suffered lung problems during or after their work at the site, according to a study of health effects related to the 11 September 2001 attacks.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/americas/5295158.stm

Just days after September 11, 2001, the Environmental Protection Agency assured the public that there should be no concern about any health hazards associated with exposure to smoke and debris in lower Manhattan. This disturbing documentary asks whether the EPA’s pronouncement was based on science or politics. Now many of the first-responders who risked their lives within that toxic chemical soup are seriously ill or dying. Filmmaker Heidi Dehncke-Fisher and producer Bruce Kennedy reveal how 9/11’s latest victims are America’s forgotten heroes.

http://www.sundancechannel.com/film/?ixFilmID=7283

Alex Sanchez likes to say he's "living proof" the U.S. Environmental Protection Agency's response to the September 11 terrorist attacks bordered on the criminal. Sanchez was exposed to dust from the World Trade Center disaster as a cleanup worker in skyscrapers around ground zero. He spent seven months enveloped in the lethal material, wiping it from cubicles, blowing it out of vents. It stung his throat, burned his eyes, and choked his lungs.

http://www.villagevoice.com/news/0536,tracker_writer,67520,.html

One of the people who assured New Yorkers that the air was likely safe after the 9/11 tragedy now has second thoughts, one day after a study was released that shows a majority of those who worked at ground zero now have some kind of lung problems.

Christie Whitman, who was an administrator with the Environmental Protection Agency in 2001, said one week after the attacks that, "Given the scope of the tragedy from last week, I am glad to reassure the people of New York and Washington, D.C., that their air is safe to breath and their water is safe to drink," she added.

The study, from the Mount Sinai Medical Center, says nearly 70 percent of the rescue and cleanup workers who toiled in the dust and fumes at ground zero have had trouble breathing, and many will probably be sick for the rest of their lives, doctors said Tuesday in releasing results of the biggest Sept. 11, 2001, health study yet.

http://www.wnbc.com/news/9798821/detail.html

According to a new report on the health effects of the terrorist attacks on the World Trade Center in New York City, 70% of the rescue personnel and workers who responded to the disaster suffered from lung problems during and after the recovery efforts. For some those problems persisted for at least two-and-a-half years after the Sept. 11, 2001 attacks and experts are not surprised.

Five years after the 9/11 attacks many survivors have reported new or worsened sinus or nasal problems along with high levels of psychological distress.

http://www.news-medical.net/?id=19930

Further Resources

http://www.emsresponder.com/article/article.jsp?siteSection=1&id=2836

http://ww4report.com/node/2450

http://www.truthout.org/docs_2006/041406L.shtml

http://www.sundancechannel.com/gallery/?ixContent=9625&ixAlbum=1

http://www.nytimes.com/2006/09/11/arts/television/11dust.html?ei=5070&en=f1b0f5201712a121&ex=1158724800&adxnnl=1&adxnnlx=1158632016-6iJt5veSTKgSWeMqh3dlEg

http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2006/09/07/60minutes/main1982332.shtml

http://www.commondreams.org/headlines06/0210-05.htm

http://lungdiseases.about.com/od/generalinformation1/a/wtc_health_plan.htm

http://www.medicinenet.com/script/main/art.asp?articlekey=63928

TANSTAAFL!

©J.S.Brown 2004-2006

Tipping the Scales: Requiem 9/11/01

2006-09-12T03:16:00.000-07:00

How much is enough? How can our thinly-veiled desire for vengeance, masquerading as justice, ever hope to vindicate the 3000 human lives, cruelly snuffed by acts of cowardice and desperation? We have long considered acts of terror perpetrated against civilians to be the ultimate evil, yet do we truly believe our enemies consider their acts any more or less “evil” than the indiscriminant bombing of Afghans, Iraqis, or Lebanese civilians? Where is the line drawn that determines what constitutes killing in the name of self defense, and killing in the name of a cause? Does our might make it right to kill as we see fit in order to force others to acquiesce? Is our idealology, our ethics, our morals, so much better than those of others, that we have the right to be judge, jury, and executioner of other cultures?

Nearly all nations have faced unprovoked attacks, and most have responded militarily as a matter of course, when do we start to question whether this response is absolutely necessary? There are those who would argue failure to respond in kind shows weakness, however, is it weakness to act better than our enemies? Is it weakness to measure our responses by whom it is, and why, we have been attacked? Is it wrong to build international support to counter threats of domestic and global terrorism? Is it wrong to expect action based on rationality rather than the same old “cowboy diplomacy?” Why should we wait for history to be the judge? Perhaps history can teach us something about why we are where we are today.

For the past 60 years, the United States has practiced a peculiar form of diplomacy around the world. For much of that time, our primary focus seemed to be in stopping the global spread of Soviet-communism. In this quest, we have allied ourselves with despots and tyrants, installed puppet governments, given out huge amounts of foreign aid, provided military training, weapons, and vehicles, and entered into any number of “black” arrangements where American moral and ethical standards were significantly undermined. While evidence is clearly available, we need only look back a mere 30 years to CIA money, weapons, and training, provided to Afghani rebels fighting a Soviet invasion. Some of this went to a group of rebels led by Osama Bin Laden himself. We provided similar support to Iraq during the Iraq-Iran war of the 1980’s, including providing Iraq with chemical munitions (thanks in great part to men like Dick Cheney and Donald Rumsfield). We have long supported Israel in its great struggle for survival; surrounded on three sides by nation-states bent upon its total annihilation. To all these ends, we have supported and condoned, the use of WMD’s on civilian populations, we have stood by as men, women, and children were brutalized, tortured, and killed, and we allowed ourselves the luxury of believing we were somehow part of the “…greater good.” But were we?

If we truly believe the taking of innocent lives to be evil, then how can we allow ourselves to be associated with it? How can we justify to our children that what we did was “more right” than what was done to us on 9/11? By what twist of words and “spin” can we continue to condone the slaughter of millions of innocent human lives around the world because a mere 3,000 of them were taken from us on one tragic and horrific day? How can we hope to build a better future, one with peace and prosperity for all humankind when in our grief, we condone the destruction of others? We cannot continue to live a lie. We cannot honor the memory of our loved ones, taken from us by those without remorse, by allowing our government to sanction the taking of more loved ones from others, the price is too high. There is no way to balance the scales through slaughter. We cannot justify our own acts of evil against others because evil was done to us. Either we are better than our enemies, or we become just like them.

"A patriot must be ready to defend his country against his government."
-Edward Abbey

TANSTAAFL!

©J.S.Brown 2004-2006

Foiling Terrorist Plots Isn’t Good Enough

2006-08-12T08:24:00.000-07:00

Thank goodness the government is keeping us safe from shampoo, bottled water, hand cream, and the deadliest of all chemical weapons: cheap floral perfume (I know I’ll sleep better at night). Political transparency is a relative term: the idea of smuggling chemicals onto a plane to blow it up is nothing new, it’s been a topic of discussion for more than 10 years. It calls into question the timing of this latest plot to deprive us of our favorite carry-on items. If there is anything I deplore worse than the smell of cheap floral perfume, it’s the stink of cheap politicking that hits your nose before you even get a chance to see it coming, that’s what worries me.

Yes, I admit, it’s good to stop terrorists before they actually blow themselves (and other innocents) up, no arguments there, but I just don’t trust our government to protect us from others, let alone themselves. They’ve lied to us, literally “cried wolf,” one too many times for my taste. Don’t fit me out for an aluminum foil hat just yet. I’m not ready to join the “conspiracy cults,” but I must admit that, between the rhetoric and all the “cowboy diplomacy,” I am having serious difficulties distinguishing between the terrorists outside our nation from the terrorists who are running it. Our current leadership have repeatedly lied, bullied, and blundered about, destabilizing the Middle East, damaging our reputation in the world arena, and our economy is worth less than the paper its printed on, yet are we really any better off than we were on September 10th, 2001? Is it good enough just to tighten specific security measures in order to ward off each new means of attack?

Of course the 24-hour cable news “noise-makers” have dropped every other story like a hot rock from Iraq, to milk this “Terror Plot,” for everything it is worth. They’ll beat the horse, strangle it, and drag the carcass around the square before they’re done, (and that’s before the politicians get their hands on it). The airwaves are alive with the sounds of media speculation. People wonder why there isn’t more “good news” in the world, and there are two reasons for this: first, bad news sells more advertising, second, good things only happen when people together to solve their common problems, despite their differences.

I predict the usual routine: the “threat level” will be elevated, financial markets will drop, gas prices will raise, and the Bush Administration will use this event to “prove” Democrats are “soft on terror” all over again. Nobody will question the extra security; they’ll give up their hair gel just like their nail files and lighters. All these additional security checks are “…necessary for your protection.” Swarms of SWAT teams brandishing automatic weapons, and police dogs sniffing about in airports are suddenly fashionable again. I fear soon that we won’t be able to tell the difference between the police protecting and serving us, from the police-state telling us what to do, how to think, and what to say. Endgame: the terrorists get what they wanted all along: we’re afraid, less free, and more militant than ever before.

I’m sure I’m not the first one to come up with this one, but I’ve got the perfect foolproof solution to all these airplane security problems. It’s so simple: fly naked. Think about it. Not only is it extremely difficult to conceal anything, but what Islamic fundamentalist could possibly endure a plane full of naked people without totally cracking at the seams? They’d never get on another plane again. Heck, if popular modesty prevails, nobody would fly, thus eliminating all that stress, worry, need for the extra security, long lines at airports, or hijackings, for that matter.

All kidding aside, this is a serious matter. What we really need to do is stop doing things to piss off the rest of the world and work together to make it truly safe for everyone. We cannot do this while we continue to spend most of our efforts in a vain attempt to predict and prevent future attacks. It is impossible to solve any problem by addressing only its effects without also rooting out its causes; with all our "...fingers stuck in the dyke..." our hands are tied, and the water will still get by us. If we truly want to promote peace, security, and freedom, we must work together with the rest of the world to identify and eliminate the very reasons why some people feel compelled to become genocidal fanatics in the first place. No other solution will suffice.

TANSTAAFL!

©J.S.Brown 2004-2006

Had Enough Yet?

2006-06-14T22:22:00.000-07:00

Here's some of the highlights of six years with Bush/GOP led Federal Government:

A corrupt GOP-led government that favor$ corporate interest$ rather than the well being of the American people

A nebulous “War on Terror” with no objectives, no enemies, and no end in sight

Our continued occupation of Iraq has turned into a quagmire of epic proportions

Our reputation as world leader has been severely tarnished

An unprecedented Presidential power grab that severely undermines the U.S. Constitution, disrupts the system of “checks and balances,” and diminishes civil liberties for all Americans

A sluggish economy based upon massive government spending, tax breaks for the wealthy, all being kept (barely) afloat by huge infusions of borrowed money

A bloated government bureaucracy built around rampant cronyism and corruption

Sky-high gas prices that continue to eat up lower and middle-class incomes, while oil companies report record profits

NCLB - An underfunded, over-hyped, government mandated, education program specifically designed to undermine public schools, not fix them

No major improvements in overall national security since 9/11 attacks

Porous borders that permit safe passage of not only illegal immigrants, but potential terrorists as well

The federal government’s lack of cohesive disaster preparedness, coordination, and planning, failed to prevent many needless death and destruction in the wake of Hurricane Katrina

The use of various “wedge issues” to keep the American people divided against one another, and thus distracted from larger issues

A national news media that is more interested in “infotainment” than in truly informing the public

So, have you had enough yet?

TANSTAAFL!

©J.S.Brown 2004-2006

Taking Bush to Task on the Economy

2006-05-18T20:20:00.000-07:00

Las Vegas Sun - Thursday, May 18th 2006
Letter: 'Bush economy' sure does explain a lot

The "Bush economy" explains a great deal about why George W. Bush failed as a businessman and went into politics in the first place.

It seems cutting taxes for the wealthiest Americans is sort of like paying them "dividends" on their campaign contributions.

Who do you think the Right will blame when the bill comes in?

TANSTAAFL!

©J.S.Brown 2004-2006

Bush’s Tragic Errors and Comedy of Terrors

2006-05-13T09:04:00.000-07:00

(Just Whose Government is it anyway?)

I would rather die a free man than live one moment as a slave to fear.
-TANSTAAFL!

You’ll have to pardon my utter contempt and cynicism (or at least put up with it for awhile). I find myself waxing nostalgic: I miss “The good old days,” when politicians actually pretended to care and the people pretended not to notice. I remember all the puckering lip service as if it were yesterday. But things are different now. Thanks to endless tabloid “witch hunts” and scandals, we’ve been desensitized to the point that our politicians need not bother pandering to the people anymore. Our leaders don't seem all that concerned about the “finer points” of the law either. Why should they? It’s not as if anyone is going to hold them accountable or anything. The whole grand façade, the “movie set” that looks so real from the front, but is so fake from the back, has been laid bare, and guess what? Nobody really cares (and those that do are discredited, “outed,” drowned out, disassociated, and in all ways cut off from the great American teats).

If it were possible to bring together the best horror and science-fiction authors of the previous Century, they could not possibly spin a nightmare scenario as bad as the one we’re living in right now (and most can’t/won’t believe that we're really in a world of hurt). Our not-so-esteemed president was elected not once, but twice (amidst credible allegations of vote fraud), even though he allowed our nation to be attacked by “terrorists,” embroiled the U.S. in an illegal invasion and occupation for no good reason, went on vacation while Americans just a few states away were drowning, and he has the gall to ask us to “trust him” as he spies on us without any legal authorization to do so (after all we should want him to catch those "dastardly terrorists" among us recklessly talking on their cell phones while driving). Alas, I fear the fine art of misdirection in politics is alive and well in America. I suspect the politicially sanitized "sock-puppet theater" that we are permitted to see is nothing compared to all the sleazy lapdances going on backstage.

Since 9/11/01, the American public has been fed a steady diet of fear. We fear the terrorists, we fear anthrax, we fear “dirty bombs,” we fear WMD’s, most especially, we fear that if we don’t give our President more power in exchange for less freedom, the terrorists will attack us again (tis only a matter of time they say)! The “boogymen” are already here, right now, sleeping in their cells, injected deep in the heart of our nation. They’re just waiting for word from Osama to join the great jihaad, so they can go to heaven and spend their eternity deflowering virgins. Yes, apparently the god worshipped by religious fanatics sees fit to reward his highly repressed, ignorant, angry, genocidal maniacs, with eternal bliss for killing many infidels (sorta-kinda makes Christians look like bargain-basement pikers doesn't it?). We must fight this scourge (anyone remember how much George Bush Senior liked that word?) [INSERT POLITICALLY EXPEDIENT PATRIOTIC AWE INSPIRING WAR RHETORIC HERE].

Shhh…don’t tell anyone, but our government has been sleeping with big corporations. The worst kept secret in Washington should come as no surprise to anyone, but does anyone truly suspect just how extensive this “tryst” really is? The corporations own the mainstream media outlets; they control what we are told, what we hear, and what we believe. Thanks to illegal government spying programs, they are also sharing all sorts of private information on every single one of us, and they have armies of marketing gurus telling them how to keep the dumb-fat-happy consumers consuming. They can aim their carefully crafted strategies at us with the precision of a laser; saying just the right combination of words and phrases, specifically designed to have us salivating like Pavlov’s Dogs at the ring of a bell. They’ve got all the greatest hits in one collection: Abortion, Gay Rights, Immigration Reform, Political Reform, Gun Control, Religious Freedom, Religious Persecution, Drug Prohibition, Tobacco, Alcohol, Firearms, War, Peace, National Security, Secret Gulags, NSA Spying, Enemy Combatants, Terrorists, Outsourcing, Insourcing, Union Busting, Bush and Cheney wiping each other’s asses with the Constitution, Incompetent leaders, Rich Oil Companies Gouging Consumers, Global Warming, Hurricanes, Medical Insurance, Social Security, Economics, Deficit Spending, Corporate Scandals, Political Scandals, Property Rights, Right-to-Die, Right-to-Live, Medical Marijuana, Education Reform, Death Penalty, Victim Rights, Criminal Rights, Missing Persons, Found Persons, Strippers partying with college Lacrosse teams, Slow News Days, Fast News Days, Police Car Chases, Nuclear Weapons, Iraq, Iran, Palestine, North Korea, China, Which Star is Sleeping with Which, Which Star is Pregnant, Which book is on Oprah’s List, The War on Drugs, The War on Poverty, The War on Terror, The War on Christmas, The War on Easter, The War on Peace, The War on War…all this for 50 easy payments of $19.95…supplies unlimited, but you must act right away! Just wait! There’s always more! They wind us up and push all the right buttons, and just look at us going…and going…and going…

I’ve come to the conclusion that I can’t (and won’t) be afraid of another terror attack (I just don’t have the time, what, with gas prices and all). I know we can’t trust George W. Bush to “protect us,” because he’s proven beyond a shadow of a doubt that not only he’s completely incompetent, but also he’s totally untrustworthy to boot (it certainly begs the question: what kind of boobs voted for this bozo in the first place?). But still, I am going about my business as if nothing’s happened. When my nation eventually rusts out from under me, sorta like when the floorboards my mother’s ’68 Mustang, I’ll just have to pick up my feet and watch the road moving by through the holes. It’s a pickle, we’re damned if we do and darned if we don’t, we’ve flopped out of the frying pan and we’re rolling around in the fire, up a creek without canoe. If there is a light at the end of the tunnel it surely is a fast-moving train, and it's coming right for us. Does anyone else feel like we should be doing something, anything at all, but we’re just not sure what that something should be? Maybe it just comes down to asking ourselves a few questions: How many freedoms are we willing to trade for an absolute-complete-fake-sham-illusion, of security? When will we finally had enough of Bush's stupid shit-eating grin to kick him square in the teeth? Are we finally ready to handle the truth (and do we really want to)? Perhaps some of us are happy living in the blissfully ignorant shade of Bush's "truthiness," but maybe, just maybe, enough of us will swallow our collective prides, tuck our tails between our legs, set party loyalties aside, and admit to ourselves that the emperor hasn't any clothes (and he never did).

Every day, we are given just a taste, a little “sliver” of the “big picture,” (but never enough to actually see what the puzzle would look like if we had all the pieces). Secrecy is the word of the day, week, month, and year. We are the blind in the land of the deaf and dumb. We are wanderers without a map. We have been so hopelessly turned about, and distracted that we aren’t even aware we’re up to our necks in useless bureaucrats, rubes, stooges, criminal conspiracies, cronies, and spinmeisters. Despite the warnings, despite the “Holier Than Thou” celebratory attitudes of many conservatives, everyone knows something around Bush doesn’t smell quite right. Red and blue states are turning purple with rage, but nobody has a clue what to do. Everyone seems to be waiting for somebody to come up with a plan on how to get our country back. Meanwhile, the Democrats are still cowering under their desks waiting for the crisis to pass and the Republicans are too busy counting all their “soft” money to be bothered. We’re on our own. The only thing that seems clear is our nation has a very dirty diaper and nobody wants to be the one stuck having to change it.

TANSTAAFL!

©J.S.Brown 2004-2006

The “Bigger Picture Tube:” Faux News is Nothing New

2006-04-23T18:52:00.000-07:00

I don’t like Fox News that much, really I don’t. Mostly, I believe they are everything they say they aren’t, (namely: unfair, unbalanced, biased, spun, pro-Bush mouthpiece). Admittedly, Fox News really knows their target audience. They know exactly how they think, feel, what they believe, how they will react, and they deliver the just right mix. Even when one disagrees with Fox News, they play it to their advantage faster than one can say “Ann Coulter.” Be that as it may, I think we need to take a step back and look at this from the perspective of history, economics, and psychology. Fox isn’t the disease; it’s merely another symptom.

If history has taught us anything, it is that the elite of every age have managed to find some medium for shaping how people think, believe, and act. For a long time, organized religion was that medium. After the Renaissance and Protestant Reformation, literacy flourished like never before and books, pamphlets, leaflets, and eventually, newspapers, provided means by which people were “informed.” Early into the 20th Century, radio changed everything and paved the road for T.V. Never before had it been possible to send the same information instantaneously to so many people at once. If radio had a shortcoming, it was the lack of a visual. Mere voices and sounds coming out of a box allowed each listener to form their own associations and visuals, making it harder to form a consensus. Television changed all that. Now the voices and sounds came with a “ready-made” visual image, and visual stimuli can keep our attention, focus it, and better store the desired message into peoples' long-term memories. Television is just the latest in a long line of social institutions designed to distract and enthrall people into joining the mindless herd of irrational, consumer, meat puppets.

Economics teaches us that anything worth doing on as large a scale as television has become must be profitable, (or it would never have been invented in the first place). The vast majority of stations are owned by corporate conglomerates, who not only make money selling their various products, goods, and services, but they also sell advertising space to other corporations and make even more money. In an Information Age, data, secrets, knowledge, all are commodities to be hoarded, brokered, or doled out one bit at a time, dictated by precisely measured outcomes.

A little lesson in psychology teaches us the key to persuading the masses is as simple as appealing to their basic emotions. Whether one calls it advertising, propaganda, or psychological warfare, the basic premise doesn’t change: know your target audience, toy with their most basic emotions, and slowly “truth” becomes subjective and “reality” more pliable. The object is not only to make viewers susceptible to consumerism, but to also reinforce certain thoughts and feelings, and negating others. One such method is to repeat certain general assumptions over and over until they become “fact.” Another is to distract viewer attention away from one topic for something else (this method is particularly effective if it is tied to highly controversial and emotional content). The outright vilification of all things intellectual plays right into the hands of the “spin doctors,” by encouraging conformity of thinking, subduing curiosity, replacing individualism, deflecting criticism, and banishing skepticism, the people are all the more likely to accept whatever they are told without question. What so many have failed to realize is the vilification of intellectualism is a key trait of totalitarianism, not democracy.

What is “news” really? If we weren’t there to witness it, how do we determine whether it is any more reliable than rumors, speculation, gossip, or hearsay? The Bush administration has been caught funding “fake” newscasts to shape public perceptions, how hard would it really be for the “real” news to follow suit? If the victors write history, then perhaps news is merely history being written as it happens. However it is viewed, news remains a combination of carefully chosen words and carefully edited imagery with a purpose, not necessarily to inform, but rather, to reform, the thoughts, beliefs, and, ultimately, the actions, of its viewers.

TANSTAAFL!

©J.S.Brown 2004-2006

Good Night, and Good Luck: Edward R. Murrow, and the Decline of The "Free Press" in America

2006-03-24T02:54:00.000-08:00

The speed of communications is wondrous to behold. It is also true that speed can multiply the distribution of information that we know to be untrue. –Edward R. Murrow

I’m too young to remember hearing Edward R. Murrow’s tagline as he ended his broadcast each night. My parents were still young children when Senator Joseph McCarthy helped bring the true terrors of communism into the homes of every American citizen. Regardless, history provides few greater examples of just how easy it is for even the noblest of motivations by men in power to become misguided and corrupt as a result of that power. In a crusade to uncover subversive communist influences within the United States government itself, McCarthy’s investigations were only a part of a much greater paranoid “witch-hunt,” where by implication alone, without having to produce any evidence or follow due process, American citizens were tried, convicted, and sentenced, to years of being ostracized by their friends and family, blacklisted from their jobs, carrying the “suspicion” of being subversives. It is not without irony that the Senate investigations into communism in this country were responsible for creating the same sort of “Police State” conditions that were popular in the Soviet Union, and China, at the time.

No one can terrorize a whole nation, unless we are all his accomplices. – Edward R. Murrow

Considering the subject matter, it is not terribly surprising that Good Night, and Good Luck seems virtually overlooked by the press and moviegoers. The movie had no flashy action sequences, no high caliber automatic weapons, and included an intentional absence of color. There can be little doubt that the movie was meant to be a social and political statement drawing parallels to the conditions of our present day, alas, people want to be entertained, not reminded, of the stark reality of history repeating itself. Edward R. Murrow isn’t portrayed as a complicated man, rather, a straightforward, stubborn, hard-working, intellectual, who is hardly ever seen without a cigarette. Seeing the “behind-the-scenes” workings of early television news is a treat, but coming to an understanding of the true tensions between corporate sponsors, the U.S. government, studio executives, and a bunch of hard-nosed, uncompromising, journalists, who won’t back down, despite the enormous pressure to do exactly that. Perhaps the most relevant part of the whole movie is just how well he understood the medium of television and just how accurately he predicted its downfall; we’re living it today.

We cannot defend freedom abroad by deserting it at home. – Edward R. Murrow

The movie starts and ends with Murrow giving the keynote speech at the 1958 convention of the Radio and Television Directors Association & Foundation where he openly admits to his audience that what he is about to say may do no good, but that inaction could mean the difference between the [then] relatively new medium of television either having the potential for a well-informed and aware citizenry, or allowing it to fully degenerate into merely an “entertaining distraction,” representing only the interests of its corporate sponsorship. As a part of this sort of television, the “free press” would not be free to pursue the truth and report upon it, as studio reliance upon corporate sponsorships becomes greater, its influence over all television programming, including what is considered to be “news,” can only continue to be greater. If a “free press” is to be considered one of several important “pillars” for the promotion of a free society, one that is “bought and paid for” can only serve to subjugate the very cause of freedom it was intended to protect. “News” thus filtered by profit-minded executives prior to broadcast is no longer “news,” at best it becomes advertising, at worst, propaganda. There can be little doubt that Murrow’s dire warnings concerning the future of television programming is part of the core message the producers wanted to leave with audiences, but it may very be that the message has come too late to be of any inherent value. What Murrow might have to say about the current state of affairs in this nation is speculative at best, but it is probable that he would view it with great skepticism, and sadness.

Our history will be what we make it. And if there are any historians about fifty or a hundred years from now, and there should be preserved the kinescopes for one week of all three networks, they will there find recorded in black and white, or color, evidence of decadence, escapism and insulation from the realities of the world in which we live. I invite your attention to the television schedules of all networks between the hours of 8 and 11 p.m., Eastern Time. Here you will find only fleeting and spasmodic reference to the fact that this nation is in mortal danger. There are, it is true, occasional informative programs presented in that intellectual ghetto on Sunday afternoons. But during the daily peak viewing periods, television in the main insulates us from the realities of the world in which we live. If this state of affairs continues, we may alter an advertising slogan to read: LOOK NOW, PAY LATER (from the speech cited above).

We must not confuse dissent with disloyalty. When the loyal opposition dies, I think the soul of America dies with it. – Edward R. Murrow

I’ve written many times before that we live in a time of unprecedented access to information of every kind, but most of us lack the time needed just to develop the skills to determine the “good” information from the “bad,” let alone what to do about it. Decision makers in government and private corporations have whole staffs of people to sift, sort through, and make sense of available information for them, so where does that leave the rest of us? Inundated with information, most people are going to take “…The path of least resistance,” and find one, possibly two, sources of information and trust them. If these “trusted” sources are in any way tainted or slanted by the financial interests of others, then viewers are being told something other than the whole truth, and journalists have become more the “mouthpieces” beholden to corporate and government entities, rather than reporters of any truth at all. Most people haven’t the time to do anything other than take what they are told at face value, and once they’ve been told, there is little that will dissuade them otherwise.

We will not be driven by fear into an age of unreason. - Edward R. Murrow

While T.V. news outlets have always tried to “out scoop” one another, for a long time, were used to a relatively narrow field of competition. After having a virtual monopoly on T.V. for nearly 40 years, suddenly, the “big three” television networks found themselves having to “sell” their stories harder than ever. With 24-hour news networks on cable, the “old” networks had to change quite a bit just to keep up. Sensationalism, flash, and style, became far more important than substance and truth. The even more instantaneous information available by the Internet and World Wide Web could only help to fuel a move towards more “tabloid” content and less interest in actually reporting truth. Because each news outlet still wants to be first, they are less careful about the information they present. Given such conditions, how easy it is for more rapidly reported, carelessly confirmed, “news” to be picked up by other news agencies and repeated? How easy is it for specific messages to be given more “play” than others as a result of profit-minded interests rather than truth-minded ones? A sense of convenience, pleasing popular opinion, and urgency, should never be allowed to become a surrogate, or excuse, for truthfulness in reporting. Yet for information-saturated society that has a hard time telling the difference between popular entertainment, and vital information, that seems exactly what it has become. Irresponsible journalism can only lead to its deliberate misuse in order to create an ignorant and ill-informed general populace.

Our major obligation is not to mistake slogans for solutions. – Edward R. Murrow

Is there any comfort to be had in the knowledge that there was a time when journalists actually stood for something other than shamelessly promoting the interests of corporations and governments? A time when they were relentless enough to report the truth, even if that truth turned out to be unpopular, unfashionable, or came with the prospect of dire consequences for those who reported it? Modern television news bears little resemblance to its forebears. It has forgotten its roots, sold its soul, and lost its way. With a general populace interested in popular entertainment, preconceived notions, and tabloid sleaze, major news markets have no incentives to change. If ever there was a time for men like Edward R. Murrow, it is today. In light of the most recent world events, the decline of the "Free Press" in America can only be seen ultimately, as the herald for the decline of the United States of America. Should the unthinkable occur, the global ramifications are endless.

When the politicians complain that TV turns the proceedings into a circus, it should be made clear that the circus was already there, and that TV has merely demonstrated that not all the performers are well trained. -Edward R. Murrow

What more might we do? How might we begin to fix what is broken?
If the news media truly wishes to mend fences it must break with it's addiction to corporate sponsorship, advertising, and government payola, and dedicate itself to total and absolute reformation of character. It means reporters will go back to "living on the cheap," working long hard tired days, doing a nearly always thankless job of reporting the truth, without endless speculation, rumors, inuendos, insinuations, or blatantly transparent biases. No more "fillers" or "slow news days." They must relentlessly dig and root out the truth wherever it may try to hide. They must report the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, and let the public decide what they should think about it. Anything less will only be more of the same.

To be persuasive we must be believable; to be believable we must be credible; credible we must be truthful. -Edward R. Murrow

"A patriot must be ready to defend his country against his government."
-Edward Abbey

TANSTAAFL!

Essential Political, Informational, and Alternative Media Website List - 2006

2006-03-15T23:58:00.000-08:00

This is my current list of what I consider to be the "essential" political, informational, and alternative media resources on the Web. This list is by no means meant to be comprehensive, as I am alwasy finding more, and sites are being added and dropped from it on a regular basis.

Alternet

Andrew Sullivan

Bushwatch

Buzzflash

Counterpunch

Crisis Papers

Crooks and Liars

Cursor

Democracy Rising U.S.

Disinformation

Evil GOP Bastards

Fact Check

Free Republic

Freespeech Network

Illiberal Conservative Media

IMAO

Lew Rockwell

Lies

Media Transparency

Morons

MoveOn

Open Secrets

Political Moneyline

Project Censored

Project for the OLD American Century

Radical Reference

Reason Magazine Online

Reclaim the Media

Samizdata

Seeing the Forest

SourceWatch

Spinwatch

Talking Points Memo

The Agonist

The Beast

The Cato Institute

The Free Press

The Globalist Media Center

The Independent Institute

Last Chance Democracy Cafe

The Media Drop

The Memory Hole

The Nation Magazine Online

The Plank

The Political Graveyard

The Progressive Magazine Online

The Project On Government Oversight

The Skeptic's Refuge

To The People

Tom Paine

Truthout

War and Piece

Watching America

Working For Change

Wonkette

ZNet Magazine Online

TANSTAAFL!

Mr. Bush, Get your "Business" out of My Government!

2006-03-15T06:07:00.000-08:00

I was reading through the March 20th issue of The Nation magazine when a regular column caught my eye. It was the weekly installment of “Diary of a Mad Law Professor,” written by Patricia J. Williams, entitled “Perfect Knowledge, Perfect Ignorance.” In it, Williams puts into a predictable focus and context, the ongoing antics of the Bush Administration, in a whole new light.

Bush always promised he would run the country like a corporation, and so he has (even if the corporation that springs to mind is Enron). In business ethics good corporate leaders are beholden first and foremost to their investors and trustees, not to the public at large.

WHAM! The last six years play out in my mind. How wonderful it is to finally understand what it is Bush and his cronies were so brazen, so blatant, and remain so willing to disregard democratic rule of law, and the American people, as they manage the country as if it were their own private trillion-dollar, for-profit corporation (and considering how badly Bush ran his own business into the ground, is it any wonder why our nation is experiencing record debt?).

When one stops to think about how major corporations and business decisions are made, and how the Bush White House has been managing our country becomes so obvious that it is a wonder more of us didn’t see it sooner, but we had “real” problems to worry about, or did we? If a multi-million dollar corporation can convince people to buy cheap crap at outrageous prices, just how much influence do you think a multi-TRILLION dollar government, which is being run like a corporation, might have? Think about that, long and hard. Handing American ports over to a questionable Arabian country may not make good sense from a government perspective, but it makes terrific “business sense.” It makes one wonder just how many “deals” have been made at the expense of the American People, in favor of profitability.

Should we be surprised when more and more American jobs move overseas and Bush doesn’t do a thing to stop it? Why should he? From the “corporate” perspective, this is a profitable move. Unfortunately for the Bush Administration, the corporate world and world governments are not the same thing, nor is the President of the United States afforded the luxury of treating citizens like “customers,” while he treats his “fat cat” cronies like major shareholders. Tax cuts for the wealthy? No, no, that’s “dividends” to the major shareholders (campaign contributors). Rather than worry about “the people,” corporations rely on clever marketing and public relations to “sell” their message (in politics it’s called propaganda). Their message is the only one that matters to them, and they have the resources to see to it that their message is louder, gets more play, and is more “catchy” than all the rest.

The “Corporate Culture” has another advantage over government, it doesn’t have to put up with dissent, “…The Boss says so” is law, therefore no need to concern one’s self with such trivial matters as the Constitution, that’s between the government and the people, not private business. The corporate world has its own set of rules, where ethics, morals, compassion, are not virtues, they are “excess baggage.” The first, and only, rule in the corporate world is “…Show me the money.” People in the corporate world don’t care too much about others as they climb their way up, or protect their “niches.” It is far easier to be silent and do nothing than it is to “…buck the system,” especially when the “corporate sharks” are sniffing for blood. The Left has been effectively silenced because it doesn’t want to lose what little power it has left, it’s either “tow the company line, or get marginalized.” Protesters are at best, ignored and corralled away from “the seat of power,” at worst, they’re arrested and manhandled on trumped up charges. Corporations aren’t democracies; the only votes that count in a corporation are the ones cast by the board of directors, the major contributors and shareholders, not the “working stiffs.”

And so the Bush Administration has turned our government into Major Corporation, busy at work, selling all democracy money can buy. They’re even “opening up new markets” overseas, albeit at the point of a gun. I’m sure it is wonderful what the corporate mindset can accomplish when it has its own private “all-volunteer” military force at its disposal (it gives whole new meaning to the term “hostile takeover”)? Who has to care about “foreign competition” when the Bush Administration is managing the biggest superpower in the world? Imagine just how much regard this “mindset” has for the rest of us? At best, most Americans qualify as “worker bees” to these people. They may need us, but they don’t want us to know too much about that. Far better to keep us busy, fighting amongst ourselves, while they “conduct their business” from the boardrooms of the Senate, and White House.

But wait one minute…this is America, “…Land of the free, home of the Brave…” we’re smarter than this, how did we let this happen? How did they do this to us? Who brought us television advertising, popular entertainment, “Reality TV,” tabloid journalism, and got us “hooked” on sensationalism? Who constantly bombards us with messages to buy, buy, buy, and takes our money with a smile? Who has peppered us with repeated messages of just how inadequate we are: too fat, too skinny, too ugly, to pretty, too bald, too short, too tall, sexually impotent, physically ill, mentally ill, too self-indulgent, uneducated, unskilled, too ignorant, too smart for our own good? Who makes us doubt ourselves so effectively that we’ll believe whatever we’re told, spend any amount of money, and take all the right pills, if it will “fix” us and make us feel better? That’s right, corporations do. Business as usual, except now it’s firmly wrapped its slithery coils around the very arteries of our nation and it’s beginning to squeeze tighter. Before too long, we’ll no longer be able to tell the difference.

Government doesn’t operate on a profit motive, and democracy isn’t supposed to be for sale, yet this is exactly the sort of “corporate culture” which has been cultivated by the Bush White House, and despite ever mounting evidence of widespread corruption, and scandal, after scandal, after scandal, after scandal, yet it has been far too easy to keep us from actually knowing the facts: “cover-ups” are a normal part of the corporate culture, “business as usual,” is the name of the game. Control what information gets play and what does not, and there wasn’t really a scandal at all, it was all just a big misunderstanding that is easily explained, justified, and just as easily forgotten, at least until the next time.

Well, I’ve got news for you Mr.Bush. My government isn’t your “business.” You aren’t the CEO of a world superpower, you are a public servant, and all your cronies are too. You can’t sell me what I’m not buying, and you’re just about out of “capital.” Governments cannot be “managed” like big businesses, and you and your cronies will only get away with it for so long before everyone realizes the truth, the days of taking “corporate gambles” with the American people, Our government, and Our nation are over. That’s right, Mr. Bush, finally the REAL stockholders of this nation are wising up to you and yours, and we’re not about to let you run this great nation into the ground so your corporate friends can keep profiting at our expense. You have lied to us again and again. Your lack of concern for the American people permitted the worst attack ever on American soil to occur. You used crooked intelligence to justify the invasion of a country with the second largest oil reserves in the world, you have debased the Presidency by using the tremendous power and influence that office carries with it, around the world, not to make it safer, not to “…Protect and defend the Constitution of the United States against all enemies, both foreign and domestic,” but to “conduct business.” How many people have died so you and yours could make money? How many more lives will you “throw away” so you and your buddies can brag about your “record profits?”

I am reminded of a scene from “It’s a Wonderful Life,” when Jimmy Stewart lets Mr. Potter know why he can’t quite “figure out” what life is about, why Mr. Potter can have all the money in the world, but he can never have everything, and he can’t take it with him.

Just a minute, just a minute. Now, hold on, Mr. Potter. You're right when you say my father was no business man. I know that. Why he ever started this cheap, penny-ante Building and Loan, I'll never know. But neither you nor anybody else can say anything against his character, because his whole life was.....Why, in the twenty-five years since he and Uncle Billy started this thing, he never once thought of himself. Isn't that right, Uncle Billy? He didn't save enough money to send Harry to school, let alone me. But he did help a few people get out of your slums, Mr. Potter. And what's wrong with that? Why...here, you're all businessmen here. Doesn't it make them better citizens? Doesn't it make them better customers? You, you said, what'd you say just a minute ago? They had to wait and save their money before they even ought to think of a decent home. Wait! Wait for what? Until their children grow up and leave them? Until they're so old and broken-down that they....do you know how long it takes a working man to save five thousand dollars? Just remember this, Mr. Potter, that this rabble you're talking about...they do most of the working and paying and living and dying in this community. Well, is it too much to have them work and pay and live and die in a couple of decent rooms and a bath? Anyway, my father didn't think so. People were human beings to him, but to you, a warped, frustrated old man, they're cattle. Well, in my book he died a much richer man than you'll ever be!

I’m reminded of an even more appropriate Jimmy Stewart movie: “Mr. Smith Goes to Washington,” where a man who is willing to live an die by his word trumps the corrupt machinations of a political machine gone awry: “Lost causes are the only ones worth fighting for,” and this is one cause that is far from lost. It is time for this country to remember the people who died for it, the people who willingly gave their lives so we could be free. It is time to end the sham once and for all and it is time for our government to return to the cherished ideals spoken so eloquently by Abraham Lincoln at Gettysburg:

...It is rather for us to be here dedicated to the great task remaining before us -- that from these honored dead we take increased devotion to that cause for which they gave the last full measure of devotion -- that we here highly resolve that these dead shall not have died in vain -- that this nation, under God, shall have a new birth of freedom -- and that government of the people, by the people, for the people, shall not perish from the earth.

The American people don't want, or need any more of your “corporate management style” Mr. Bush. We don’t want or need any more of your empty promises, your lies, your willful disregard for the law, nor do we care for your blatant disrespect for the American people. You want to manage our government, you're going to do it the way the Constitution says, or you and all your corrupt pals are going to find themselves out of a job. I don't suspect your corporate world will welcome you back with open arms if the words "IMPEACHED" were to appear on your resume.

TANSTAAFL!

©J.S.Brown Date & Time as listed above

Fiscal Irresponsibility-By the Numbers

2005-12-05T19:42:00.000-08:00

Fiscal Irresponsibility-By the Numbers

$236 Billion: Budget surplus left by Clinton administration

$8 Trillion: Current National debt after 5 years of the Bush administration

$350 Billion: Current amount earmarked for the war in Iraq with no end in sight

$10 Billion: Current total value of no-bid contracts Haliburton has received in Iraq and
the Gulf States after Hurricanes Katrina and Rita

$9.4 Billion: Amount Bush administration promised but didn’t spend on the No Child Left Behind Act (schools are still required to comply with the act despite it being under funded)

0: Number of mistakes the Bush administration has owned up to in 5 years of deceit, lack of leadership, and incompetence

Sources

http://www.uwsa.com/uwsa-usdebt.html

http://www.toptips.com/debtclock.html

http://www.publicdebt.treas.gov/opd/opdpenny.htm

http://www.lafn.org/politics/gvdc/Natl_Debt_Chart.html

http://www.pww.org/article/articleview/6573/1/256

http://www.gao.gov/

http://www.gpoaccess.gov/usbudget/fy06/browse.html

http://www.whitehouse.gov/omb/budget/fy2006/

http://www.kowaldesign.com/budget/

http://www.columbia.edu/cu/lweb/indiv/usgd/budget.html

http://www.warresisters.org/piechart.htm

TANSTAAFL!

©J.S.Brown Date & Time as listed above

That the powerful play goes on, and you will contribute a verse.

2005-06-20T10:59:00.000-07:00

Many people have asked me about why I have a personal webpage, or a weblog at all. They do not know why I would want to put so much time and effort into something that probably has little or no meaning for most everybody else. Think about that. By publishing on the web in such a personal manner, we are exposing our most private and personal thoughts resonate around an infinite domain in which virtually anyone can partake. Amidst this sea of bits and bytes, we have staked a claim. We have taken up residence; we are part of a living presence in a world that exists only on a series of interconnected computers around the world. Why would we want to do this? Why would we want to continue to use our most valuable and precious time and effort to this end? The answer is the same no matter what the medium is. Art is art. It is an expression of our innermost passions and feelings. It is what drives us to “...Be more than the sum of our parts.” It is an opportunity, if even for a moment, to taste immortality.

Writing is my art. I didn’t choose it, it chose me. I don’t know why. I know many other forms of art that I love and appreciate, but words are my pigments and hues. The “white screen” is my canvas. Why I am driven to write is part of the mystery of life that is no more or less a question of why people read, view paintings, or watch movies. There is something there for us. Some spark of understanding and magic that allows us to expand ourselves. Just as many of us are drawn to the images of special affects, cameras becoming our eyes and microphones our ears, extending our reach a thousand-fold. The electronic frontier of the Internet beckons, with full-color graphics flashing before our minds like the waters of Tantalus, yet for some reason, there are still people who find the proper combination of words on a page important.

Ideas are not always preformatted pictures on a screen. They are often born from people who think and read. For many, ideas are born out of writing; the process itself is their copulation, the mergence of the neuro-chemical reactions in the brain which produce the various impulses that become the gametes of data, information, ideas, and finally, knowledge.

For knowledge is something more than the sum of its parts, it is the evolution of all that comes before it, all that reaches up through doubt, chaos, and confusion, and leads us to understanding. We do not always know or believe the same things when presented the same set of information, but articulating those differences can make it possible to find the common ground beneath our feet.

Writing is a transmission of sorts. It has a frequency and a bandwidth of its own. It clearly has a sender, and anyone who reads it automatically becomes the receiver. Exceptional writers can “attune” their writing to specific receivers, insuring that the message is clear, concise, and focused.

Writing can travel great distances, it is not limited by line-of-site, nor is it limited by time or space. Writing can reach down through the ages and tell us about what people were thinking long before we came along. Writing is done in a series of moments, that once complete, can never be replicated exactly the same way again. Reading is a series of moments in which the writer words become a living, breathing part of us, if just for a moment.

Writing is an urge, it is a desire to see, think, feel, and share thoughts with others. It is a gift, a treasure beyond all the riches of avarice. The written word, well constructed, can cause revolutions in thought and action. It can cause governments to fall, and new nations to be born. It can bring people closer together, or tear them further apart. To read is to write, and to write is to read. The two are part of the same constant. When one allows us to grow within, the other helps us to bloom outward.

Writing gives our thoughts a voice that is louder and alive with passion than we ever believed possible. Even as it resonates out wards towards others, it vibrates within. Writing provides us with the ability to transcend ourselves, to become larger than life, to affect others in a way that we might not be able to do in any other way. Our writing is a part of who we are, and when we share that with complete strangers, we suddenly live beyond ourselves and stretch out into a larger universe of possibilities. When we write, we affirm that we are alive, and that our ideas have meaning to us, and that the ideas of others affect us just as deeply. Every voice offers the opportunity of a new perspective, every word, is a stepping stone across a new stream of consciousness never crossed before. Why write? To be heard, to rejoice in the moments of your life, to cross the gulf between yourself and others. Writing is a choice. Either we choose to be heard, or we become another drone, wandering through the din of faceless silence, adrift in an endless sea of apathy.

In his entire life, poet Walt Whitman only published one book of poetry he called Leaves of Grass. The difference with Whitman was that he kept adding to that one book and republishing it throughout his lifetime. It became a never-ending anthem for him. It would be his companion, his journal, his being, and his soul. His works were never really finished until he was. That is the true answer written so clearly by all writers of all times and all places.

O Me! O Life!

O ME! O life!..of the questions of these recurring;
Of the endless trains of the faithless—of cities fill’d with the foolish;
Of myself forever reproaching myself, (for who more foolish than I, and who more faithless?)
Of eyes that vainly crave the light—of the objects mean—of the struggle ever renew’d;
Of the poor results of all—of the plodding and sordid crowds I see around me;
Of the empty and useless years of the rest—with the rest me intertwined;
The question, O me! so sad, recurring—What good amid these, O me, O life?

Answer.

That you are here—that life exists, and identity;
That the powerful play goes on, and you will contribute a verse.

-Walt Whitman

TANSTAAFL!

In Praise of Periodicals

2005-03-20T13:53:00.000-08:00

Often when I find myself nearby, I’ll stop in at the local Tower Records WOW Superstore. While I love music and I usually end up buying a CD or two while I'm there, there's another reason I like to visit this particular store: Magazines. The store itself is huge. I can't guess at the square footage, but it has to have at least two football fields worth of space. Nearly half of the back wall of the store has racks stacked 8 high with magazines. What is it about these flimsy and glossy periodicals that make them so popular, even today?

As much as I love the Internet and the Web, there is something to be said for being able to hold something tangible in one’s hands, fumble through the pages reading articles and looking at pictures. The best thing about a magazine, for me, is that it’s portable; it can go anywhere you want it to without bulk, cables, extensions, or batteries. Magazines are often the “reading material” of choice when I have to visit our “john.” Another feature that makes the magazine so wonderful is variety of content. While the overall theme of the magazine might be about computers, science, trivia, or fashion, the content within that focus is diverse enough to keep me interested. If a particular column or article does not strike my fancy, I can always move on to the next one.

Reading is Fundamental (or is it obsessive-compulsive?)

I have a pre-reading ritual with magazines (advertisers and magazine subscription departments, take heed, there will be a quiz later). The first thing I do is flop through the magazine looking for card stock. I carefully remove these (so as not to damage the content). Once I’ve removed the extra-thick pages, I look to see if there are any tri-fold advertisements and remove these. Rarely do I personally purchase magazines with those extremely annoying perfume or cologne advertisements, but should I encounter them, I excise them. It makes me wonder if magazine companies that have smelly advertising make hypo-allergenic versions of their products for those people who are extremely sensitive to them. I know I’d be willing to pay extra for that. As a matter of fact, I would be willing to pay as much as two dollars extra if the publisher would forego the card stock, smelly perfumes, and tri-folds all together. I don’t think I’m in the minority here.

One of the best ways to evaluate a magazine is to read their letters. One can learn a lot about the mag from this simple exercise. Reading letters to Penthouse for example, leads one to draw the conclusion that this magazine has something to do with people fantasizing about sexual experiences they would like to have. Other things one can learn from the letters is which order to read the columns. The person who gets the most complaints/hate mail is always the first place I read. This person is whom I call (to borrow a literary term) the “foil.” Contrary to its more traditional meaning, a good magazine foil riles up the readership and keeps them asking for more, they can make or break the entire magazine. It is walking that "razor's edge" between riling and annoying that makes being a magazine foil so difficult. If this person does their job right, they help keep readership steady because whether the reader loves or hates them, they want to find out what they’re going to write about next. An excellent example of this is John C. Dvorak. from PC Magazine. John has the singular talent to simultaneously stimulate and infuriate his readers which, I for one, find refreshing. Not every magazine does this, and many that do don’t do it very well. Where it seems to work best is where the primary focus of the magazine contains many diverse "schools of thought" with broad perspectives and opinions. It isn't really so much that the facts change, it's just that the opinions, egos, and perceptions surrounding differ. John's Column in PC Magazine contains a lot of controversial opinions and positions which can drive experts and novices alike up a wall, but that's exactly the point! We need people like this to stimulate and motivate us, otherwise we all become mindless lemmings gleefully marching to the beat of the same drummer, all jumping off the same cliff in a mindless purge.

After reading the letters and feature columns, I start to dig into the actual articles. I pick the ones that interest me the most and work my way through them, usually over a period of several days. If something strikes my fancy, I might annotate it for further research, otherwise, I have pretty much “sucked out the life” of a magazine in a few days time. Being a “packrat,” this is not the end of their life, quite the contrary. Usually they collect dust for a few months before I consign them to the deep of the local landfill. There is always the chance I’ll go back through them for anything I might have missed the first time, and if there is a reference or annotation, I have to get that before I bury it with honors.

(Meanwhile...back at the WOW Superstore...)

At WOW, the process of selection is difficult. Starting out on the far right are the extreme hobbies and sports, then it is the aficionados, which includes everything from coffee, fine foods, wine, cigars, women, men, and hemp. Then we start getting into my section: science and technology. From there we head into politics, news, facts and statistics, and spirituality. Next are the “mainstream” sports and hobbies. Then we start to get into the stuff I have no interest in: fashion, home, decorating, parenting, etc. Finally, at the far left of the section, we see the “partition” that is meant to keep younger eyes from peeking at the porno. Yes, if you are wondering, I have perused the porno section. They have every conceivable fetish (and quite a few I’d never have thought of) imaginable represented, from the rather tame and docile soft-core, to the ever raunchy hardcore. But I digress...

The selection process cannot be rushed. I try to limit myself to three magazines a visit, but it is difficult. Very nearly always one will be a computer magazine (PC World), another science (Scientific American), and the third is usually the “wildcard” of the bunch. To my way of thinking, (seeing as I do not make it to WOW very often) at least one of the magazines I buy should be one I’ve never read before, (or at least one I’ve not read regularly). Most recently, I have been regaling myself of a small magazine known as Mental Floss. Here is a magazine like no other. Within its slender pages are nothing but facts, dates, trivia...in other words, “Jeopardy! Knowledge.”

This month’s issue of Mental Floss includes: An A-Z Guide to 46 Outlaws, It's a Blunderful Life: Embarrassing Moments in Engineering, 5 Freds You Should Know, Vanishing Act: Explaining the Mystery of the Maya. It also contains features for both the left and the right brain. It is in essence, the magazine for anyone who likes to know really weird stuff, the kind of stuff that might actually impress people at a party (I said might). Mostly one finds information that the majority of human beings seem to get along fine without knowing, but for those few of us who have an unquenchable appetite for knowledge (i.e. nerds) it’s the cat’s meow.

Magazines are the ultimate portables. They can go just about anywhere you do. They provide a wide variety of topics loosly connected to a similar theme, they can be rolled up to swat flies, they can fit in your back pocket, they are great when you're sitting on the "John," and they are relatively cheap. So the next time you find yourself looking down a rack of magazines, take a chance; pick up one or two you’ve never read before. You may not know what you’ve been missing.

TANSTAAFL!

Finding a Needle in a Stack of Needles: The “Googlization” of the World Wide Web

2005-02-12T07:54:00.000-08:00

Once upon a time, most people were not particularly interested in access to information. Those that were knew where to find it, and those who weren’t, didn’t bother too much about it. With the dawn of the Information Age, this began to change. Suddenly, information was readily available to anyone who wanted it simply by accessing the Web and doing a browser search. As the value of data increased, so did the methodology designed to make it easier to find.

Search engines started out as mostly human culled databases, meaning people determined the relevancy and timeliness of web sites that were linked to search results. As the web multiplied, this practice became highly impractical as no human being could possibly hope to properly sort the available amounts of information, and it has continued to grow exponentially. This led to the use of intelligent programs that are often called “bots” or “agents” to sift and sort the various search categories and criteria. The language used to write web pages, HTML, included a method for providing search engines with the needed datum quickly in the form of “meta-tags.” Simply put, web page authors would include two sets of information at the beginning of a web page, one was a set of key words, and the other was a set of subjects. By tuning search programs to look for these keywords and subjects, it would be easier to determine whether the search criteria matched the result criteria. This worked for a period of time, and meta-search engines flourished. This is about the time that Google first appeared on the scene.

Google was different from the human or meta-search engines; in fact, the method it used to produce results is the result of a set of programming patterns known as algorithms that remain a closely guarded secret to this day. One of the most striking differences between other search engines and Google is their program based its criteria more on popularity rather than relevance. Regardless of the reasons why, Google has rapidly become the search engine of choice for the vast majority of people using the Web. The use of popularity has had the effect of skewing the result patterns on the Web towards sites which are visited regularly rather than sites that may have true value to them. The result of this has been sites of commercial, scholarly, and personal value are missed whereas sites that are more popularly accessed are presented first. Google’s patented methodology for ranking web sites has led to a blooming industry in methods designed to “hack” or fool Google into ranking certain websites higher than others (it’s not nice to fool with Mother-Google). Google has responded to these attempts by removing any website whose designers resort to trickery to promote themselves. This “Google Effect” upon certain websites has helped to create another phenomenon discussed in an earlier post to this blog. The existence of a totally submerged World Wide Web underneath the one we interact with every day, often referred to as the Deep Web. The Deep Web consists of sites that might have intrinsic value, but they aren’t included in Google’s search criteria or ranking system. Many of the sites that are ignored by search engines lack the meta-tagging scheme that provided many websites with the ability to be selected by other search engines, and thus these sites would never enter Google’s ranking system. Other sites just never reach the threshold of popularity needed to be counted.

As a student of information (who isn't?) I have found myself using Google less and less due to the fact that it has been clogged with irrelevant, duplicate, and obsolete sources of information. I am certain this observation is nothing new, and considering the many new features and options available via Google Scholar and the digitalization of some of the more well-known university libraries in the United States; I know that this is an issue of concern for your company. Google has a unique position in the World Wide Web as the primary "Gopher hole" of its day, and should it not be able to continue to innovate and adapt to the needs of the times, it could very well end up as much of an anachronism as the University of Minnesota's once famed portal has become. Having used Google and the beta of Google Scholar for a good portion of my graduate work, I can say that it is possible for someone with experience in Boolean logic and skills with information sorting to find valuable research data from both, however, I also believe I am not the "norm," nor should the bulk of Google's marketing be aimed at people such as myself, rather, one would assume your resources would be focused on providing search services that fall towards the center of the bell curve rather than its ends.

My greatest concern with using Google is that, even with the advanced search options, it is difficult to narrow the criteria down sufficiently to prevent a large number of "false positive" hits. Many of these hits are dated, or they contain irrelevant information that just happens to contain text that somehow nearly matches the search criteria itself. Being able to limit the search to the last three months does not prevent sites that are far older from being presented. Another issue is that the language options do not make it possible to limit English from the US from English in the UK, or its provinces. There are succinct differences in language, economy, and culture that often make the use of Anglo-English sites less attractive from American English. It seems the value of meta-searching has reached a limitation it cannot overcome. There is also the issue of the "deep web," or sites which have been completely submerged below the many layers of popularity.

Google Scholar is an interesting concept in theory; however, it seems to fall short in application. While I have yet to do a more quantitative study on the matter, I can say with confidence that a greater number of the hits on any given topic fall behind some proprietary information portal that requires the user be a paid member to access. As my research usually has something to do with technology, computers, and information systems, I see ACM and IEEE sites most often. While I do have access to such portals via other means, again, I assert I am not a part of the "norm." For more "mainstream" scholars, who are more than likely undergraduates without affiliation to many resources, this would seem a serious limitation to using Google Scholar. One of the things that would seem crucial in a world where information travels at the speed of light is as open access to that information as possible. Unavailable information is the breeding ground for ignorance.

My thinking as to a solution to the problem is an expansion upon the meta tagging idea, or perhaps a sort of "manifest" similar to the one that is compiled with .NET programs that provides extremely succinct query information that can then be used as the basis for the construction of a temporary relational database entirely based upon the user search criteria. The whole thing could be run in a manner very similar to Microsoft Access, and perhaps even be stored onto the users computer rather than elsewhere. The international consortium on all things Web: W3C is working on something along these lines with its XML Query Project; however, not even this will be able to solve the entire problem. The problem with providing information relevancy on the web seems to be two-fold: First, setting a set standard of query criteria within the languages used to write web pages that can be more flexible and adaptive to change. Thanks in great part to Google, meta-tagging is rapidly becoming an obsolete method of search result sorting, mere subjects and keywords cannot hope to narrow search results down enough to create a more succinct output. This standardized language must be embraced by the search engine community as a whole. To do the job right, a newer and standardized method must be envisioned. Secondly, just creating a standard query method is not enough; convincing those that publish their work to the Web must be willing to use the standard query language in order for it to be useful. This means it must be succinct, easy to work with (not just for programmers), and create the context for more relevant search criteria to be used. This seems like a tall order, but I am convinced it must be considered in order for search engine optimization to become a reality. What must be a key component of a search engine is a more complex discrimination scheme that matches search criteria with result criteria is far more focused and concise than it currently possible.

TANSTAAFL!

Confessions of a Reluctant Mathematician

2005-01-26T08:47:00.000-08:00

For most of my life, I have avoided mathematics whenever and wherever possible. I hated math. It wasn’t so much that I couldn’t do it, but that I didn’t enjoy doing it. Public school math teachers seemed to believe teaching one way to do things was the only way to keep things simple, and any deviation from this was met with disdain. My natural curiosity led me to try experimenting with what I was learning, and my teachers didn’t have time to go off on my (pardon the pun) tangents. Math teachers always expect students to show work for their answers, if one didn’t, then the answer was not only wrong, but the person was suspected of cheating. As I got older, I simply refused to do math assignments. I didn’t do the homework, and my math grades reflected a lack of interest, enthusiasm, and knowledge as a result. When I was in high school, I was only required to pass two years of math and two years of the most often companion to math: science. After meeting these requirements, I never looked back.

My natural strengths have always been reading and writing. From the moment I learned to read, I devoured books. The library was my sacred refuge. I could bring home several books from the school library and read them all before going to bed that night. On those nights I couldn’t sleep, I would often use a flashlight to keep on reading after I was supposed to be asleep. I was a troubled child growing up. I often got grounded or restricted to my room. No matter how much trouble I got into, my parents did one thing right: they never took away my books. It was the only thing I had going for me in the dark years of my youth and adolescence. In the 7th grade, we took aptitude tests in math and reading. My reading score was in the 98th percentile. My math was in the 28th percentile. I could read and comprehend better than 98 out of 100 students, whereas I could solve math problems better than only 28 out of 100 students. This disparity would follow me for many years to come. In 9th grade, my teacher noticed me squinting to see the notes on the blackboard. It turned out I was nearsighted, so to add to the discomfort of being an awkward teenager, I added glasses. Now I could see better, but it still didn’t cure my negative attitude towards anything math-related. I failed the first semester of Introduction to Algebra, and as a result, I was transferred into the lower Introduction to High School Math, where I just managed to scrape by. My negative attitude towards school in my freshman and sophomore years of high school would live to haunt me when I struggled my junior and senior years to improve my GPA. Despite getting nearly all A’s and B’s the last two years, my GPA at graduation was a dismal 1.8, placing me close to 345 out of a class of 500.

After graduation from high school, I enlisted in the Navy. My ASVAB (Armed Forces Vocational Aptitude Battery) scores indicated I was on the high-end of their scale. I was by no means a “super genius,” but I scored better than 80% of my contemporaries taking the test. An opening in Electronics school because someone else failed to graduate gave me an opportunity to get more education than I had thought. Of course, the pre-school for electronics school just happened to be known as B/EE, or Basic Electricity and Electronics School, and it was nearly all mathematics. At the time, I had no idea about the men who pioneered what I was studying. Later I would discover they were the life works of people like Georg Simon Ohm, Andre Ampere, , Michael Faraday, James Maxwell, Rudolf Clausius, James Joule, and many others. The most important thing I remember from this time was Ohm’s Law, which allowed one to determine resistance, voltage, or current in a series circuit if one had at least two of the values. As many of my peers discovered, the calculations fell into a nice pattern that was easily remembered as a triangle:

I

E R

I = current measured in Amps
V = Voltage, measured in Volts
R = Resistance measured in Ohms

To find the current, cover up the I, and you know it’s V multiplied by R. To find either the Resistance or the Voltage, cover up the desired item and it is I over its opposite. This worked great in simple circuits, but they didn’t stay simple for long. Soon I was knee deep into circuits with values that changed depending on the state of gates, semi-conductors, and diodes. It got pretty complicated and I was nearly out of my depth on more than one occasion. I managed to pass BE/E with a 73%.

Electronics school proved too much for my brain. Despite spending a lot of time in extra-study, I just couldn’t keep up and I failed. Because of my extra study hours, I was given the opportunity to be reclassified into another rate. After careful consideration of the choices, I ended up in electro-mechanical calibration and repair. This presented another whole aspect of math and physics I was ill-prepared for, but it also provided me with an opportunity to shine. The school spent an entire month teaching what I had learned at BE/E in 7 months. I didn’t really need to pay attention because they were not presenting anything new. In the months that followed, I was able to grasp the concepts of machines, pressure, torque, temperature, mechanical revolution, precision instrument measurement, and several others. I graduated from this school with a 92%.

Despite this early success, my thinking was not very clear, nor was my problem-solving skills very sharp. I would manage to pass promotion tests by a narrow margin, and I was able to perform most of the duties I was assigned to, but I was not the best technician in the world, mostly because I lacked the necessary patience, forethought, and discipline. As my Navy career winded down, I began to look at college. As a sailor, I was afforded an opportunity to take the SAT’s at no cost to me. I scored a 970. Again, this was my abilities as a reader and writer that allowed me to score high on the verbal, and rather dismal on the math. To nobody’s surprise I looked towards earning a degree in a Liberal Arts field.

My college entrance exams indicated I had the necessary skills in English, but lacked math skills. I was enrolled to take Introduction to College Algebra against my wishes. I did try hard, but my frustration, lack of patience, and lack of interest led me to drop the class and seek a degree program that had no math requirement for graduation. I had neatly side-stepped the problem for the time being. However, again and again, I would find myself in situations where math skills were crucial, and I would be unprepared.

By this time, my affinity for all things computing had made itself evident. I had a “knack” for figuring out how to make them work, how to fix basic problems with them, and how to get the most out of them. As a result, I began looking into graduate coursework in computing, where, not surprisingly, I ran into math once more. My first programming class was in C programming . I worked very hard at this, but I never quite felt like I knew what I was doing. The people around me chattered in what seemed to me to be some sort of foreign “techno-babble.” The only reason I passed this class with a “B” was because I had help on my final exam. My program worked really well until it got to the very end when it was supposed to output the results of a mathematical problem. For whatever reason, I couldn’t resolve the error, but a friend of mine saw the issue in a moment and fixed the one or two lines of code needed to make the program work. If this hadn’t happened, I don’t know if I would have passed the class. At the time I was just so relieved to have gotten by this obstacle that I really didn’t consider the fact that no matter how one slices it, I cheated to pass a class. I am not prone to cheating in anything, but in a subject I desperately wanted to learn more about despite my perceived struggles and handicaps, I let it slide. Of course, my lack of understanding would have dire consequences on the next programming class I took.

The next class took C programming several steps further. We were looking at how to use the language to solve more “real world” problems, most of which were purely mathematical in nature. I withdrew from this class twice to avoid failing it outright and I never got a chance to take a programming class at this school again. I got a job teaching computers at a local high school and dropped out of graduate school all together.

My very first teaching job paid very little. My fiancée had been trying to get hired by any district in the area with little or no success, so we both applied to districts outside where we lived and landed interviews with the Clark County School District in Las Vegas Nevada. As luck would have it, both of us got hired, so we packed up and moved across the country to better paying teaching jobs in Nevada.

I taught for a year and found teaching was not what I thought it was going to be. I was not as well-prepared for a more “traditional” classroom as I had thought from a year teaching computers. The rules had changed and I didn’t adjust with them very well. Within a year I was politely told my contract would not be renewed. I was out of a job. I took refuge in the realm that I loved so much: computers. By the time the school year ended, I was on the phones doing technical support for Dell Computers.

My first tech job did not pay very well, but it did have regular bonuses for good call times and resolutions. I quickly gained a reputation for being able to help people with their problems and resolve calls efficiently. My monthly bonuses were among the top 10 for the six months I remained a phone technician. Then I was promoted. My career as a tech would take many unusual twists and turns, sometimes I was out in the field, sometimes I was on the phones, still other times, I was given very non-specific duties to support computing efficiency. All of these jobs were sub-contracting. All of them carried little in the way of benefits and stability. Most of them ended up with my contract being terminated after my services were no longer needed.

In an attempt to improve my chances of landing a more stable position, I decided to go back to school and pursue a Masters in computing. I ended up at the University of Phoenix in their Computer Information Systems Management degree program. Here I began to see what it takes to really run technology projects, how to understand the very uncertain nature of the business world’s take on computing. Technology projects are rarely cheap and more business-minded individuals have a hard time seeing what they call a “return on investment” from them. Technology projects often bolster the infrastructure of a business, but rarely do they have an immediate or direct impact on the bottom line, rather, their benefits are realized in very small increments over a much longer term. This has a tendency to make men and women who are responsible to shareholders nervous and reluctant to allocate funding and resources to IT departments.

As I am now coming to the end of my masters program, a new fire has begun to burn brightly within me. My field has many organizations, journals, conventions, and resources that I have become more aware of. As the industry changes at the speed of light, so must I continually keep up with it through research, reading, and communicating with my peers. As with so many others, my career field often “brushes up against” the fields of science, math, and engineering, so much so that I have become far more aware of the implications they have upon my future. As a result, I have come to read far more technically-oriented materials. I have successfully programmed computers using a variety of programming languages. I have come to see my lack of math skills as a detrimental flaw in my abilities. I have also begun to understand what I never understood before. My lack of understanding of math and science was just that, a lack of understanding. Now that I understand the underlying principles of both, I find myself drawn to the very problems and theories I used to repel from. I want to learn them. I want to be able to apply them. I want to know more. In essence, maturity and a new sense of myself have driven me full circle, and I am no longer afraid.

One day, I was reading what I thought was a fascinating article in Scientific American, where astonishing new theories concerning black holes were just coming to light. These new theories were causing scientists to look at the universe in a radical new way, as one big giant computer. It was once believed that nothing escaped the gravitational forces of a black hole, but brilliant astrophysicist Stephen Hawking, helped prove that some energy did escape from a black hole. Thus it was theoretically possible to input physical matter into a black hole and measure the output energy in a similar way to how one would enter data into a computer program and measure the output. This speculation does not answer whether or not the output would make sense in relation to the input, but the theory is none-the-less fascinating. The article also mentioned something called quantum information theory, which caused me to do a web search on that subject, and that led me to information theory, and a man named Claude Shannon.

In 1948, a mathematician working for Bell Labs named Claude Shannon proposed a mathematical theory for calculating the most efficient means of transmitting a message over a noisy channel. This theory was so revolutionary at the time that it led to breakthroughs in all aspects of communication, electronics, digital electronics, computing, and more. Shannon’s breakthrough paper, A Mathematical Theory of Communication, became the foundation upon which most of our Information Age would be built upon. Here is a man who more than likely died not knowing just how much impact his work would have upon the future. Here I was reading the paper and actually understanding the basic principles of it. Since then, I have ordered more books on this subject, and after that, I began ordering books on subjects such as discrete math, physics, Scientific math, and so on. I have joined the Institute of Electrical and Electronics Engineers, so I could get more access to the “bleeding edge” of technology today. I am looking towards finishing my masters and going on for a PhD. in Information Systems at Nova Southeastern University.

Along with all these developments, I began working as a junior Satellite Hub Technician for Hughes Network Systems, which again has required I learn the finer points of the engineering necessary to keep major satellite communications systems operating, troubleshooting remotely, and understanding the principles of electronic satellite communications. Once again, the marriage of science, math, and technology are demonstrating to me that I cannot hope to pursue a career in this field without all three of them. This time, I’m ready.

TANSTAAFL!

Done with Mirrors: The Impossible Paradox of Public Education

2005-01-20T23:22:00.000-08:00

The Outside Looking In – Societal Perceptions

Public education for the majority of the Twentieth Century was modeled after the Industrial Age assembly line and behavioral psychology, which equated every student as merely a set of stimuli and responses, rather than as individual human beings with individual wants and needs. Students were “tracked” according to whether they were considered bound for further academic, general, or vocational training. Students who were unable to “fit” within these three areas were hidden away from view. Students were expected to behave, sit in rows, take notes, respond to teacher-led discussions, and come up with identical answers to problems. Deviation was not tolerated. Corporal punishment was permitted, as were other severe methods of forcing conformity. Students learned a much regimented curriculum that was considered to be more than adequate preparation for a male to spend a lifetime working in a factory, an office building, or further training at academic institutions. Exceptional males might become doctors, lawyers, or engineers. Female students were trained to be home-makers, secretaries, or teachers. The exceptional female might rise above these more common occupations as a nurse.

War changed many things. World War II in particular, saw women leaving the homes and the “traditional roles” to fill in for the men. Women got a taste of what it was like to earn a paycheck and do all the things that society normally proscribed for men. When the men returned home, women were again strongly encouraged to return to the home and leave “everything else” to the men. For a time at least, women seemed willing to reprise their previous roles, (but the times, they were a changing).

The “Baby Boom” that followed WWII would have a dramatic affect on public education. This dramatic increase in population would lead to the development of suburban housing tracts, which in turn encouraged the production of more roads, more cars, more home appliances, more babies, and of course, more schools. Everything about the Baby Boom would require the “assembly line” model of schools be rigidly enforced. There were simply too many kids for schools to cope, let alone experiment, with any other model. Besides, parents, teachers, politicians, and administrators were all of one mind when it came to education in this era. They worked together for the benefit of each student, so long as each student complied and conformed. Non-compliance and non-conformity was, by necessity, a punishable offense.

The evolution of public education from this very rigid model in the 1940’s and 1950’s would play an integral part in the social upheaval and backlash of the 1960’s. With the advent of the birth control pill, women were once and for all freed from their traditional roles. They could finally be as promiscuous as men without the constant fear of pregnancy. Women began to desire a larger role in society than that of the few professions open to them, and the one their wombs designated for them. This along with the anti-authoritarian backlash of the Vietnam War caused a major distrust of our government leaders and government institutions, of which public schools were. The new “liberated” parents of the younger generations would carry their distrust and disdain for authority to such an extent that it readily boiled down into their children, who became increasingly more unruly and undisciplined. The powers that were given to schools to enforce rigid conformity and discipline were taken away and replaced with no power at all. The Post Baby Boom generation, Generation “X” (my generation) would be passed the torch lit by the previous generation, and it would forever change public education.

By the time I was of school age, television was no longer a curiosity, but an influence to be reckoned with. New technologies were emerging that would bring motion picture special effects to never-before viewed levels. We were on the edge of the computer explosion, and the seeds of the Internet were already being sewn. By the time I was in sixth grade, (1981) cable television was becoming the norm (those who could not get cable had satellite dishes). The rotary telephone was rapidly being replaced with the touch tone. Answering machines were starting to be seen, and the first generation of affordable personal computers was flying off the shelves. VCRs, microwave ovens, and Compact Discs would soon follow, as the promise of the emerging Information Age began to gather steam.

Nobody could have predicted how far we would come from a technological standpoint, but this was one “Pandora’s box” that nobody wanted to close, and no institution would feel the brunt of this dramatic change more than public education. At the time, there were very few teaching jobs to be had. Teachers were often not well-paid, but they had good benefits, plus they had excellent vacation time. Most teachers taught their classes based upon the classical training given them using methods that were valid in previous Industrial Age era classrooms, but these methods were no longer valid in Information Age classrooms. The knowledge gap between teachers and students was no longer the same. Most teachers knew more about their content area than students, but they lacked the added dimension that technology could have offered them; students began to have an ever-widening edge that left most teachers behind. This phenomenon has continued to the present day in many ways. The older generations do not, as a rule, truly understand or comprehend technology, and have been intimidated by it, whereas the younger generations have grown up immersed and inundated by it. The Information Age has caused us to view “literacy” in a whole new light. Once this meant merely the ability to read, now literacy is applied to a much broader spectrum of abilities and understandings.

The New Student is not as challenged by the ideas of the past, not when they have the ideas of the future all around them all the time. They cannot relate to the written word the way previous generations did, for them, the written word is something one does only when one cannot use some other means of communication; and then usually it is truncated for use in text messaging over cell phones or the internet. Young people are constantly entertained by high technology means to the point that they find any other means of entertainment dull by comparison. Getting their attention and keeping it, takes far more effort than most teachers are capable of providing. It is not just that we are in an Information Age anymore, but that we are in a Digital Information Age that continues to elude educators and administrators alike. For young people who can not imagine a time before 100+ channels on TV, VCR’s, DVD’s, Cell Phones, Personal Computers, and so on, how can it be that we’re still using essentially the same methods of teaching and learning that haven’t been valid for more than 50 years?

We have a large amount of schools spread out over a large area. Not only do these schools have to contend with the fact that they are outdated in a period of rapid technological and social upheaval, but they have their own regional issues to deal with. Nearly all public schools have fluctuating student populations, and many face the lack of adequate resources to contend with this. Many formerly industrialized regions have seen those industries dry up and blow away (along with the funding these organizations provided). Severe poverty in these regions results in low teacher pay and even higher teacher expectations. Schools are seen as the “only way out” for many young people. Involvement in scholastic athletics is for many, their only way to afford a college education. For the relatively few who are talented enough to go beyond collegiate sports, there is the allure and dream of professional sports. Academics thus become a second-class citizen in this lofty pursuit; seen only as a means to an end, rather than the end in itself. The “heroes” of the school become the stereotypical male athletes and their cheerleader girlfriends. Hierarchy is determined not by who is the smartest, but by shallow concepts of popularity and vanity. The smart kids, who might someday actually have something to contribute to the world, add very little to the reputations of the schools, are given extra “brain teasers” to work on. Academics are devalued in our society. Intellectuals are considered “radical liberals” and “socialists” by adults, so why should young people view them as valuable? Smart people are viewed with distrust and distaste. They are given labels such as “geek” and “nerd.” They are often viewed as social outcasts because they aren’t a part of “the norm.”

Another group outside the norm is the “rebels,” who are often very smart, but use that intelligence to rail against rigid authority. Many of them come from broken homes, where they experienced firsthand the imperfections of the most important adult authority figures in their lives. Without being able to trust their own parents to be consistent and make them feel secure, it is no wonder why so many young people have an intense distrust and dislike for all authority figures. These are the ones who spend an inordinate amount of time in detention, in suspension, or waiting for more punishment to be meted out just outside the principal’s office. Their emasculated (and often split) parents just shrug and throw their hands up, not knowing what to do to correct the many problems their children encounter. Parents who can barely own up to their own irresponsible behaviors are unable to force their children to face them. The parents are victims of poor choices, and it is their children that ultimately suffer for them. This is too much for most parents to accept, so they want someone else to blame. Send in the teachers.

Public education in America has suffered through a social and technological crisis that is difficult to understand. It has its roots in the anti-authoritarian movement of the 1960’s which led people to see anything that had ties to the government as “the enemy.” Young people then became the parents of a generation of kids who were not subject to the same rigid discipline at home, and thus did not behave as such when they entered school. The children of the 1970’s also had an advantage over their predecessors, thanks to television shows such as Sesame Street and Mr. Rogers; they came to school with what were considered advanced skills and knowledge at the time. Schools had to adjust their curriculum to deal with a generation of kids who learned more and more from visual media rather than the written or spoken word. Schools did not adjust well. Many of them tried very radical changes that inevitably failed and the response was to force them to go back to what had worked before, but which couldn’t possibly work on a generation of students that lacked the same set of social and academic backgrounds as the students before them.

The Inside Looking Out – Teacher Perceptions

The law of averages seems to indicate that a given classroom of kids will spread out over a bell shaped curve that describes their grade level, skills, and abilities, but cannot assess potential. The highest number of children in the class will fall into an "average," whereas a minority of them will appear in the "low-end" and "high-end" portions of the curve. Because of the large numbers of young people there are in the public school system, it becomes a "numbers game," in which the most popular strategy is to "...teach to the middle" and hope that the "low-end" students can somehow keep up and the "high-end" students can somehow occupy themselves.

Then we use “one size fits all” standardized testing to score the performance of a school. These tests lack any incentives for the students to take them seriously, (and many of them do not) but are taken seriously in the assessment of the performance of the school. In our score-driven society, public schools are being tried, judged, convicted, and condemned, all based upon faulty criteria which seeks to vindicate parents and politicians of any wrongdoing in the matter, thus leaving the blame on the schools, (which eventually filters down to the teachers). This, of course, is only the academic portion of the story.

From a behavioral point of view, we have students with all sorts of issues and problems, many of which have nothing to do with school. The vast majority of them are likely due to issues with their family, and a good portion of them are the result of physiological, psychological, and neurological abnormalities that range from minor to severe. It used to be that those who demonstrated a severe threat, whether behavioral or academic, to the progress of the class as a whole were segregated from the "normal" classroom. This led to an outpouring of parental complaint that has now created the "multicultural" or "inclusive" classroom environment. By law child must now be placed in the least restrictive environment in which he or she can achieve according to whatever limitations they may have.
The problem with this concept is that the classroom teacher is not adequately trained, nor prepared to handle children with everything from minor to severe developmental delays, lack of ability or skills, behavioral abnormalities, and the various accommodations these children may require. Some children with these sorts of problems are "shadowed" by a special education facilitator, but this sort of assistance is generally hard to come by.

What we have is a veritable pressure-cooker of problems being compounded by political, economic, and social pressures which make heavy demands upon an institution without providing it with the necessary tools and resources to properly enact them. We then have the same political and social pressures blaming the institution for its inability to carry out the impossible tasks for which the pressure was brought to bear in the first place. In the vicious cycle of events, everyone blames the other, nothing ever gets done, and the students are the ones who ultimately get short-changed, by receiving a mediocre education at best.

The result of these two dissimilar images is one of anger, frustration, confusion, and disillusionment. Both are no more than reflections in a mirror; the perceptions of the people who are looking into them for the truth, and seeing only what they want to see. The current negative perceptions of teachers will eventually reach a point where there won’t be enough of them to go around. While this may benefit the current crop of teachers, it is certain to have a negative outcome on the student population. It is up to every part of the educational process to recognize their roles and responsibilities if we are to cure what ails public education. Only when parents, teachers, administrators, politicians, and students throw away their mirrors and start working with one another will things improve. As long as everyone remains locked in a constant battle to deflect the blame, there is no way the false images can be changed.

TANSTAAFL!

Juxtaposing Notions, Or The Legacy of Government Bureaucracy, the Internet, and the Future of Information Networks

2004-11-16T19:26:00.000-08:00

Once upon a time, the three major branches of the U.S. Military placed a lowest bidder contract for computers...because these branches had their own procurement offices and funding, the Army ends up with DEC computers, the Air Force ends up with IBM computers, and the Navy ends up with Unisys computers. It would not be until the U.S. invaded Grenada that it was discovered that these three different systems were proprietary, and thus incompatible with one another, meaning they could not communicate or share data (ah, yes...that low-bid government bureaucratic redundancy at its finest). Since no two branches could agree on scrapping their systems in favor of the other one, another solution had to be found. This is where TCP/IP comes in.

TCP/IP is a suite of network protocols devised to allow different kinds of information systems to share data over a network. This required it to be system-neutral in order to allow it to cross the different proprietary platforms. It solved the problem and became an instant success with the DOD, and thus was available for integration into then fledgling Internet. At the time, nobody could have predicted that we would be where we are now. The explosive growth of the personal computer, the Internet, broadband, commercial networks, the World Wide Web, wireless networking, and commercial VoIP, have all served to “stretch” TCP/IP to cover situations for which it just wasn’t designed for. The reason TCP/IP is still around is due to the fact that it is fairly simple and, despite its limitations, it still does work, however, it does have many limitations and potential vulnerabilities that are not addressed through its current configuration.

Since TCP/IP is really a marriage of protocols, it is important to understand what each part does and why:

TCP - is responsible for verifying the correct delivery of data from client to server. Data can be lost in the intermediate network. TCP adds support to detect errors or lost data and to trigger retransmission until the data is correctly and completely received.

IP - is responsible for moving packet of data from node to node. IP forwards each packet based on a four byte destination address (the IP number). The Internet authorities assign ranges of numbers to different organizations. The organizations assign groups of their numbers to departments. IP operates on gateway machines that move data from department to organization to region and then around the world. http://www.yale.edu/pclt/COMM/TCPIP.HTM

The implications of making such a change to the protocols which comprise the "foundation" of modern computer networking is so great that updating these two protocol suites are being accomplished separately. It takes time for a global consensus to reach an agreeable standard concerning protocols.

Acceptance for replacing IPv4 with IPv6 is well on its way, however, no such convergence has taken place concerning updating TCP.

The problem of a new TCP is as complex (if not more so) that the TCPIPv4/v6 changeover which the Internet community has found very hard to deal with.

However, the factors in slow IPv6 deployment largely revolve around the fact that there is no communicated compelling reason to change. Given that a point of time will arise when changes to TCP are necessary for basic performance, it can be expected that, if a migration is conducted with appropriate change management planning, the adoption will be far quicker and far smoother than the IPv6 changeover. However, some basic factors need to be taken into account:

A compelling reason to change has to exist - No major change to core Internet protocols is going to be undertaken unless a compelling reason exists.

A compelling reason to change has to be communicated - Similarly, a major communication project is needed for a change of this magnitude. Trying to do it without formal change management planning would not succeed.

Involvement of major players will help - In particular, major players should be engaged, and planning for total adoption should take into account their adoption schedules. Once again compelling reasons to change have to be communicated: the cost to the market leaders to make the change across all product ranges is substantial, and the economic reasons to stay with current configurations may be compelling. We may be talking about changes to every connected device on the planet here. This could exceed 1 billion devices.

Co-existence with old systems has to be allowed but only for a limited period of time - There cannot be a one day changeover. This is addressed elsewhere in the Internet Analysis Report - 2004, but for a quite substantial period of time the new system must co-exist with the old. http://www.circleid.com/print/752_0_1_0/

Generally speaking, changes to technology are driven by reaching a "critical mass" of sorts. TCP has not yet reached this critical mass, but the continued development of IPv6 is bound to highlight TCP's shortcomings.

This should by no means imply that nobody is working on TCP's replacement:

Popular potential replacements for TCP
SCTP or Stream Control Transmission Protocol, initially developed by Randall R. Stewart, and Dr. Qiaobing Xie, this has gotten a very warm response from the international community.

DCCP, or Data Congestion Control Protocol, this grew out of UDP, or User Datagram Protocol development.

eXplicit Control Protocol, or XCP, an exciting protocol being developed at the Informational Sciences Institute located at USC

SACK-TCP, or Selective Acknowledgement Transmisssion Control Protocol, out of the Advanced Networking Division of The Pittsburgh Supercomputer Center, a joint effort between the University of Pittsburgh and Carnegie Mellon University.

Additional replacement protocols in various stages of development

S-TCP, or Scalable Transmission Protocol at Cambridge University

FAST TCP, Fast Transmission Control Protocol out of Caltech

BIC-TCP, or Binary Increase Congestion Transmission Control Protocol at the Computer Science Department of NC State University

HS-TCP, or High Speed Transmission Control Protocol at the Center for Internet Research, which is part of The International Computer Science Institute

HS-TCP-LP, or High Speed Transmission Control Protocol Low Priority, at Rice University.

Westwood + TCP an improved TCP Reno (see below) entry by a technical university in Italy called Politecnico di Bari

There are also various experimental TCP implementations named after various geographic locations, (but these seem more like experimental "proof of concept" types of implementations):

TCP Reno
TCP Tahoe
TCP Vegas
TCP NewReno
TCP Net Reno
TCP Niagara

Additional Semi-Related (and exciting) Resources

Sigtran.org- Signal Transport Protocol Website

Technical Data Center

The Information Technology Professional's Resource Center

High Speed Internet Protocol Test Results

Web 100 Project

Net 100 Project

TANSTAAFL!

Bye-Bye Miss American Pie: Dubya's Dystopian Wet Dreams

2004-11-08T17:33:00.000-08:00

In the aftermath of perhaps the most vivid election in recent memory, I feel like a member of the home team crowd at a sporting event; suddenly hushed by a well-executed play by the visitors. In a hotly contested race such as this, there are always penalties and prices to be paid. The democratic process cannot be a spectator sport, but it is never kind to those who choose to participate, even by those who feel they were rightfully vindicated by it.

The steam of pent-up emotions run high as the boiler churns. The insults, speculations, debates, desires, arguments, truths, falsehoods, promises, and results all push the gauge beyond its limits, and there is nothing that can stop the explosion. There is no relief valve in a binary system such as ours; only “on” and “off.” Whether our recent election results bring elation or disillusionment, the resulting release is one of relief that the pressure has escaped its containment.

My metaphoric sojourn is one that does bear the scars of bitter defeat. While my many opponents may gloat in what I deem a puric victory, I must scratch my head and wonder how such a thing could happen. How could the power of ignorance triumph so greatly at a cost that is likely to be paid by the entire world, as it will by the American people? How could so many be deceived? Is this truly the will of the people, or is it the will of the elite? The answers are no doubt there for those who wish to question them, but there seems little interest. The specter and spectacle of the 2000 Presidential Election hangs over our nation like a shroud. It whispers for us to accept what is and never question what we don’t need to know. There is no push to peel back the surface of this election for fear that it might tear the delicate fabric of our nation. Behind the scenes of our nation, the minions of “George W(inston Smith) Bush” clones are quietly revising our past so we are not tempted to question the present, or the future. New enemies will threaten us from without and within, and we must be ready to defeat them.

I cannot help the visions and nightmares that cloud my thinking. I am drawn to the writings of George Orwell, Aldous Huxley, Ray Bradbury; (great writers who warned of the possibility of a Dystopia, or Negative Utopia), and Adolf Hitler; (who showed the world how easily it could come true). The world of free ideas has been thwarted in favor of the mindless slogans of propaganda and the fears of the masses being controlled, coordinated, and contained. To speak against the leader is to speak treason. To think thoughts of dissention is to invite acts of terrorism. We should conform, we should obey, and we should confess our sins only as prescribed by the high priests of government, whose benevolent rule is for our own good. Our rights are those we are given by their grace, and our joyful obligation to them for this boon is clear. We are the many workers whose sole purpose is the support of the elite. We are the serfs who owe our very lives to the lords. Their decisions are our decisions, their desires are our desires. There is no deviation from the plan; there is nothing outside the precisely measured world in which they define for us by way of media control, mouthpieces, and propaganda.

We have become the inhabitants of Plato’s Allegory of the Cave. We no longer see the chains holding us fast, instead we believe ourselves to be free. We are fed a constant stream of images, thoughts, emotions, and fears, yet we think them to be our own. When one of us manages to break free from the chains and tells us of the “real world” outside, we mock and ridicule them. We consider them heretics, fools, and traitors. We pity them, and force them to be “re-educated” until they willingly sit down as the chains are clapped on them and all thought of the “nonsense” they spoke before is excised from their minds.

Let us Review for those who have just joined us.

In our nation, intelligence has been made synonymous with radical liberalism, which in turn has been made synonymous with all ills of society, such as: socialism, communism, and evil plots to undermine “Traditional American (Bullshit) Values.” Our universities and colleges are breeding grounds for these “immoral radical leftists” who want to wipe out Christianity, think gays should be able to get married, want to legalize drugs, support genetic research, and think any attempt to ban abortion is wrong.

Part of the long term plan to undermine American liberalism was outlined by Lewis F. Powell in a confidential memorandum date August 23, 1971, a mere two months prior to his nomination to the United States Supreme Court. The (totally non-political tax-free church) Right has mobilized its forces in a desperate crusade to combat these immoral influences, and a major victory was won last Tuesday when (nobody questioned) Bush (mandate from the heavens) was reaffirmed by (God), the Electoral College, and the Popular Vote; along with Fair and Balanced reporting (Pro-Bush News-Speak) disseminated by the (Karl Rove Ministry of Propaganda) News Media, which made it all possible.

Just like Adolf Hitler, these people who are now in charge have provided us with their plans from the start. They never hid anything from those who wanted to take the time to find out. They even have a website where anyone can see what they are all about. It demonstrates clearly that so often, the easiest method for getting away with anything is to do it in plain sight. Whenever necessary, media misdirection can be employed as well.

Is nobody the least bit suspicious about the “sudden” invasion of Falluga, Iraq? For months it seemed our political leaders were content to contain the insurgents of this city, now “...all peaceful avenues have been exhausted.” Could it be that someone (Bush) was lying when they said they weren’t playing politics with our service members lives? Could it be that more of our mothers, fathers, sons, daughters, brothers, sisters, uncles, aunts, and cousins are destined to come home anonymously hidden from view in flag-draped coffins? Apparently the majority of Americans don’t give a damn, because they voted to let it all happen. Bye-Bye Miss American Pie.

TANSTAAFL!

American Idiot

By Green Day

Don't want to be an American idiot.
Don't want a nation under the new media.
And can you hear the sound of hysteria?
The subliminal mindfuck America.

Welcome to a new kind of tension.
All across the idiot nation.
Everything isn't meant to be okay.
Television dreams of tomorrow.
We're not the ones who're meant to follow.
For that's enough to argue.

Well maybe I'm the faggot America.
I'm not a part of a redneck agenda.
Now everybody do the propaganda.
And sing along in the age of paranoia.

Welcome to a new kind of tension.
All across the idiot nation.
Everything isn't meant to be okay.
Television dreams of tomorrow.
We're not the ones who're meant to follow.
For that's enough to argue.

Don't want to be an American idiot.
One nation controlled by the media.
Information age of hysteria.
It's going out to idiot America.

Welcome to a new kind of tension.
All across the idiot nation.
Everything isn't meant to be okay.
Television dreams of tomorrow.
We're not the ones who're meant to follow.
For that's enough to argue.

Art, Evolution, Relativity, and so Much More

2004-11-08T13:15:00.000-08:00

“This was an awakening for those who had not slept; and a dream for those who were awake; and a vision for those who could not see.”

-J.S. Brown

An artist in modern times has a wealth of options concerning their expression. There exists as many mediums and methods for the creation of art that it boggles the mind. Artists today generally end up specializing in a narrow band of mediums where they feel comfortable creating their art.

If we go far back enough in time, we see these choices begin to strip away, one-by-one, until finally, we see ourselves in a cave using primitive methods to inscribe simple symbols on the walls. These artists are really no different from their more modern brethren. The significant difference lay in that they were limited by the times and circumstances in which they lived. They lacked the resources, opportunity, and scope to do anything more than put their images on those cave walls. This is all they had, and they made the best of it.

It is possible to trace through time the evolution of humans and the progression of human art. Following closely in the footsteps of our cave painters are those artists who saw shapes in fragments of rock and used crude tools to refine those shapes. As our ancestors’ ability with such tools evolved, so did their ability to create works of art. We find carvings made of all sorts of materials: tusk, bone, rock, wood, metal, clay, and so on. Those items which have survived into our time demonstrate our crude beginnings and the promise of more refinements to come.

As we found our way out of the various ages of development, our art has grown more sophisticated, more able to produce emotion and wonder, more meaningful to a broader audience of people. It has helped us mark the times, and it has given us something greater to aspire to. Art was perhaps our very first window towards communication with each other; at the very least, it allowed us to provide at least a “sketch” of individual ideas and feelings that could be shared collectively. In this way it was bound up in our religious and spiritual traditions for thousands of years.

When people discovered they had something to express that wasn’t always about religious or spiritual matters, art began to outgrow its narrow confines and burst forth as a way of expressing the entire human condition; this would prove to be a critical turning point in our social and individual evolution. Art ceased to exist for a specific purpose other than for its own sake, people began to recognize they too, had a purpose that did not necessarily begin or end with mere survival, but with attaining something just beyond their reach. Art begins to show us that existence can be so much more than simply breathing, eating, excreting, breeding, and dying.

The artist challenges his or her work to show them something about themselves or the world around them. They dive into their work with a desire to live within the process of creation until they touch something inside them they cannot understand nor deny. It fills them with light and darkness, with anticipation, and dread. It touches every inch of their being, and for that moment, they are cosmic, orgasmic, whole, and enlightened. The medium, the art, the expression, they all blend into one to become a microcosmic universe and the artist alone is the God of that universe. For some, this happens every single time, for others, they struggle to find that place and reconcile it with everything else around them. This feeling can become like a drug that never fully satisfies. It can both save and damn the artist for all time. We all have seen the results of a great artist, whose tragedy flows as water or blood; knows too much, sees too much, hears too much, and understands too much. They can no longer abide the separation of their universe from the universe we all must share. Their creation consumes their soul, their addiction consumes their body, and their insanity consumes their mind.

Human art is an expression of the times in which it is expressed. It is a reflection of all that is. It makes no judgments, rather it allows all to assign their own. Art both mirrors and mocks as each tries to understand how it “fits” into the individual understanding of every conscious being that experiences it. Art need not always be a vision, or a sound, a word, or a feeling. It is what it is, yet it is rare for any two individuals to come away with exactly the same understanding of it. We believe our art defines us, yet it is we who define it. It is we who determine what it stands for and how it affects us. What may begin as nothing more than a therapeutic expression for the artist can somehow be transformed into a spectacle for others to immerse within.

Art is the ultimate expression of human philosophy. It asks questions for which there are no answers, it provides answers for which there are not yet questions. It shatters boundaries and it retreats to safety without providing any reason. Art exists and yet it has no quantifiable or logical purpose, other than to show us just how much we do not know. No matter how great our knowledge, no matter how infinite our wisdom, no matter how powerful we may be, art has the power to strip us naked and reveal our weakness for all to see. When we see ourselves through it, we are transparent and lacking, yet we are somehow strengthened by the fact that it shows us just how little of our total potential we have reached.

TANSTAAFL!

Marking Time

2004-10-25T11:14:00.000-07:00

Recently, I had the opportunity to take a long car trip with my step-father. On this car trip, I had a portable MP3 player plugged into the tape deck. This is a man whose life has been centered on hard work, cold beers, and music. The way he says it, “...Music is how we mark time in our lives.” I have come to appreciate this greatly on my own personal journey through life. We all remember the “big hits” the year we graduated from high school. My step-father plays the kinds of music that speaks of working hard, and playing hard; the kinds of tunes that tell a story. Most of what he listens to would be considered “oldies” by today’s standards, but that does not detract from the fact that many are among the standards in my own musical tastes as well. Bands like Credence Clearwater Revival, John B. Sebastian and the Lovin’ Spoonful, The Hollies, Canned Heat, and Simon and Garfunkel, just to name a few.

My love of music goes back to my own father as well. My grandmother instilled a love of music that caught fire in each of her children and extended down to her grandchildren as well. My father played the trombone, the drums, and the guitar. I found that I didn’t have the patience for an instrument, but I had enough understanding to sing by ear (I still can’t read music to save my life). Most of my schooling in music came from participating in choir. I remember a visit to my Uncle Tom’s house where he played a recording of Scott Joplin’s The Entertainer. I was all of three years old at the time. Ironically enough, my grandmother and I shared a love of Mozart that I would not learn about until her death in 1997.

Yes, I believe we do mark time with music. It fills us with hope when we are down, it gives us strength when we feel weak, and it inspires us to push forward when we feel we haven’t got anything left to push with. I remember the day I finished the last assignment of the last day of my undergrad like it was yesterday. I went to my room and played Peter Tchaikovsky’s 1812 Overture and drank a beer (with many beers to follow later on). I am the first person (on my mother’s side) in my generation to earn a college degree. I felt like there wasn’t anything I couldn’t do; just as the Russians must have felt when the dreaded Russian Winter drove Napoleon’s invasion army from their country after it had conquered most of Europe.

Through everything I have been through, there is a song, like a precious stone I have collected, that defines the moment. I can look back at where I was at any time and find a song that represents how I felt, what I was thinking, and where I was going. Some of them happened to be a hit at that time, others were “gems” I just happened to discover then. No matter what I might be doing, whether it is painful or fun, music has gotten me through it. I even have a song picked out for the day I die: the original Dobie Gray recording of Drift Away. I don’t think its macabre, just something that I have decided to be appropriate.

I love all kinds of music, from blues, to jazz, to rock and roll, to pop, and all forms of classical. I can get excited about a John Henry Bonham drum solo just as easily as a Frederic Chopin piano solo. A special on John Coletrane or Howlin’ Wolf can transfix me like a deer in headlights. I find myself keeping time with the music, thumping my hand against the couch in rhythm. I listen to the powerfully belted out poetry of Melissa Etheridge and I cannot imagine how one person can possibly contain so much passion and artistry. Melissa is battling breast cancer at the moment, if you would like to send her a message of support, or donate to her chosen charity on her behalf you may do so by clicking here.

I think about how we mark time with music as my life is about to take another unexpected turn, not for the better or worse, but just the kinds of things that happen every day, but we never imagine they will. I consider life to be an adventure and music is how we mark the time of that adventure. As I embark on yet a new aspect of my adventure, my music is with me. My personal “Song of Songs” plays out within me as if it were broadcast over all the FM stations. The essence of every living creature on this earth can be summed up by music of one sort or another. As I am marking time with my music, so are each of you with yours. Find your tune and let it resonate within you no matter where life takes you.

TANSTAAFL!

Bizarre Love Triangle

2004-10-21T16:29:00.000-07:00

I have been married for 5 years. In that time, my wife and I have had only bits and pieces of a year as a married couple. The rest of the time, my Mother-in-Law, Anna has been living with us. Anna is a great help around the house. She cooks, she cleans, she takes care of her portion of the expenses, and she has given much to make our house a better place to live. She paid for a pool and helped us refinance our mortgage, and to protect her investment, she has had her name put on the deed to the house. In other words, she bought her way into our lives. Mary only left Anna to marry me (at the age of 28), until then, she had lived her entire life with her mother.

Most of the time, these living arrangements do not bother me in the least. Then there are the times when Anna has some objection to something I’ve done (or not done), that according to her rules and specifications, is wrong. Since this does not happen all the time, I have to assume she is biting her tongue until something just drives her over the edge, and she just has to say something. The problem with this is that my reaction to her judgments and criticisms varies greatly depending on many factors. If I am well rested, medicated, and generally content, I can easily dismiss her criticisms. When I am not, I respond to her by getting very defensive and vocal. We can go long stretches of time without a major “blow up,” but when one happens, I become a “non-person” in the house. Anna won’t talk to me and neither will Mary.

My Mother-in-Law has worked to drive a wedge between me and my wife since I can remember. She has interfered with our marriage and she has insinuated herself in such a way that it is next to impossible to imagine how three people can live together. She seems resentful about my wife and I having time together. I think she would rather have Mary all to herself like it used to be. Mary will not be able to handle the estrangement of her two favorite people. Her loyalties are torn, yet she told me from day one that if it came down to a choice between me or her mother, I would not be her choice. I committed myself anyway. I didn’t realize when I asked Mary to be my wife that I was really asking to marry both her and her mother.

Mary is the baby of the family. When Anna’s mother died, she was terribly depressed about it. Her doctor suggested she have another baby, so she did. She named her daughter after her late mother. Mary grew up to be the one who tried her best to please everyone, and do as she was told. She never questioned her mother. As a result, Mary has spent her life emulating her mother in order to please her and never really given much thought to finding out who she really is. Because she was the baby and was sheltered her whole life, Mary has great difficulty making decisions on her own. She wants every decision she makes to be the one that will make everyone happy, but often this is unrealistic. Anna has so conditioned and controlled Mary; that she has great difficulty operating outside of a very narrow environment.

Mary has been molded by her mother to be Anna’s idea of “the perfect daughter” in every respect. Mary is ambitious, hard working, dependable, and persistent. There is no action in Mary’s life that is not part of a greater plan. Mary believes that her well-being, happiness, and health are worth sacrificing so long as she is perceived as hard working. She holds a job, has decent credit, and pays her bills on time. As long as she can do this, she feels others will view her as “normal,” but she pays such a tremendous price to maintain this image. Her physical health has declined severely. Her mental and emotional stability are questionable, and she is not happy. My presence has provided her with a built-in excuse to blame her unhappiness on. As long as she can blame me for her sadness, she never has to look at what is really going on in her life. She never has to face the fact that she is an “empty shell” of a person totally driven to please Anna and others, even if it means sacrificing herself to do it.

Both Mary and Anna live by routines that vary little. There is no part of the house that does not have a clock. They seem to schedule and plan everything. Anna is meticulous to the point of obsession. Mary has learned to let things go somewhat, but Anna tries her best not to let that happen. Anna has resumed the role she played so well back East. She tends to Mary’s needs as if Mary was still a little girl, and Mary accepts it willingly, because she’s never known anything else. Anna has staked all her self-worth on how well she takes care of others. She and her husband were estranged for most of the 37 years they were married, so being a “caregiver” was all Anna had. Within a year of our getting married and moving from Western Pennsylvania to Nevada, Anna sold her house because she had nobody left to take care of.

Anna and Mary share another attribute: they take offense very easily and both are emotionally difficult. The smallest of actions by others is liable to be taken deeply and personally regardless of the intent by that person. I have seen both of them end friendships and associations based upon mere misunderstandings. To them, they are “deal breakers.” During the course of our relationships, we three have argued and reconciled dozens of times only to have the same issues creep up again. After the last big “blowout,” we all agreed to go to group therapy to try and straighten out our issues, however, this rapidly turned into a “bash Jeff” session, which produced nothing of any value for anyone there. The therapist recommended Mary and I meet without Anna for the next session, so we did. This session ended up being more about Mary and my marriage than the difficulties between Anna and me. By the next session, another “blowout” had occurred in which I overreacted and became defensive when both Anna and Mary got on my case. Mary was ready to divorce me and did not want anything to do with me. Both use their silence as a weapon, and both took my ambivalence to mean I did not care. I have always heard the old adage: “respect your elders,” and I have tried hard to live by it, however, I also happen to believe respect is earned, and when I am not respected by someone, how can I respect them?

They say that the things we judge and criticize about others are a direct reflection of our own flaws and failings. We see these things in others that we cannot accept about ourselves. I feel as though someone has kicked me in the stomach, hard. I cannot see how this can work out. Anna has succeeded in driving us apart and Mary cannot accept that fact. She will remain loyal to her mother even if it means the end of our marriage. She will betray herself and become a sad and lonely schoolmarm rather than betray Anna.

As for my biggest contribution to this “Soap Opera,” I have a well-established pattern of spotty employment. I have been working towards mending my ways and focusing in on a career, but the only kinds of jobs I’ve found in my field are temporary contracts that do not guarantee me 40 hours a week or benefits of any kind. I have hesitated to take any work outside my field for fear it will hurt my chances of establishing myself. I have gone back to school to pursue a master’s degree to increase my earning power. I am looking to get further training and certification to advance myself. In the meantime, I should be working somewhere, anywhere, but when I try to get work, my education and background becomes a hindrance. I am overqualified, and why would someone with my kind of training need to take any sort of job outside my field unless I was trouble?

I tried to be a teacher, but found myself unable to cope with the paperwork, the politics, and the feeling that the administration was more interested in covering their own asses than covering mine. A parent would complain about something and the administrators would cave to that parent’s demands. I made several mistakes, including making inappropriate comments to a student. I believe I was driven to this sort of lack of judgment by being constantly scrutinized and penalized for every mistake I made. Being so intensely scrutinized caused me to have a mental and emotional breakdown by the middle of that school year. I was a basket case for most of that year. Perhaps I am not well suited to public school teaching, but after spending five years of my life training to be a teacher, it is a hard thing to accept.

Since failing at my chosen vocation, I have centered my attention on computers and computer support. I have done helpdesk work and I have done field technical work. Most recently, I worked a year as more of an application support specialist, assisting in the transition from legacy COBOL driven software to newer windows-based software. In each of my positions, I showed great skill, creativity, problem solving, ingenuity, and an utter lack of respect for authority. Eventually this lack of respect would cause me problems with my employers. I tend to be too interested in doing what I think is best rather than what is best according to those who employ me. I seem to think that I know better than they do when I do not have all the information, nor do I know how “the game” is played at that site.

Another of my flaws includes not being an attentive cleaner. I do not feel a need to scrub everything, nor do I pick up every errant item that might be lying around. I clean my personal office about once every three months and usually toss out about two big garbage bags of papers and other junk that has accumulated. Both of them see anything out of place as “clutter,” and they find it impossible that anyone else might miss it. I do not like to clean. I find it monotonous and boring. I do it when I must, but I will never spend the time and effort they spend on it.

Perhaps Anna truly does want the best for her daughter. Perhaps she does not see me as the best because I am not as responsible or hard working as Mary. There is no doubt that I have flaws. There is no doubt that I have failed to provide for my wife in a way that I am satisfied with. In the 5 years we have been married, the longest I’ve held the same job is 13 months. Of course every job I’ve had since leaving teaching has been a contract job where I have had no guarantee of permanent employment. I am at the whims of the company that employs my contract. They can decide at any time to terminate it without reason. This seems to be the nature of the kind of work I am doing, but it is just so hard to live with. In the past 5 years, I have been fired from 2 jobs, and either been laid off, or had my contract terminated from 5 others. In that time, I’ve left two jobs voluntarily to take better ones; I was eventually fired from both.

I suffer from AD/HD and Bipolar Disorder. My moods are very volatile and unpredictable, however, I am not a danger to myself or others, especially when I take my medication. Occasionally, I forget to take my meds, and this can lead to disaster. Anna has a tendency to make every negative judgment she makes seem harsh and overly critical. When I am not centered, I do not respond well to this (that disdain for authority I suppose). This has caused great difficulties. As I said, this last incident was an overreaction on my part, but it served a purpose for Anna. She has declared after three sessions (only one of which did she attend) that the therapy isn’t working and that Mary is wasting her money. She wants nothing more to do with it. Why isn’t the therapy working? Because it has failed to “fix me,” which is the only problem in this whole affair. They aren’t the problem; they don’t have issues or baggage from the past, only I do. Everything would be peachy if only I would adjust my attitude to better match theirs.

This past week I went away to see my family back East. I hadn’t seen them in over 2 years. I hadn’t been back to the area Mary and I grew up for more than 4 years. It was a freedom I hadn’t felt in some time to be away from this. I did miss my wife, but I didn’t miss the awkward situation I have allowed myself to be placed in. Coming back to it was a mixture of eagerness to be home and dread to be stuck there. To make matters worse, in the shuffle of bags, I managed to “lose” my laptop, along with a lot of CD’s and accessories. I don’t think I’ll be seeing that again.

I attempted to discuss and reason with Anna. I really wanted to work things out. She does not wish to reconcile our differences. I tried to tell her that we really had to talk it out, for the betterment of Mary. This infuriated her to the point of using curses and anger towards me. She is tired of trying to understand and get along with me. She accuses me of being verbally abusive towards her. She even said she filed a report concerning my abusive behavior and that she could call the cops and have me removed if she wanted to. She even told me that Mary doesn’t want me here anymore either. She says I should leave because her name is on the deed instead of mine. I have contributed nothing to our house and she has contributed everything. I am holding Mary back because I am a no good bum. She thinks I should have stayed back East with my family since nobody wants me here and I can’t hold a job. The whole thing degenerated into an argument concerning whose family doesn’t want whom. It didn’t take Anna long to start cussing and cursing at me, the very same “verbal abuse” she accused me of. She even threw an onion at me. The ugliness of this thing I have been a participant in is beyond redemption. If Anna and I cannot live together peacefully, it may well spell doom for my marriage, (which may well have been doomed from the start). I can’t imagine any other man who would put up with the kind of interference Anna has put me through, but perhaps it is time for me to move out of the way and let someone else try.

Mary came home from work and Anna was not far behind her. Before long Anna was demonstrating all the nastiness she could think of. She told an extremely biased version of what happened (knowing full-well that Mary will believe her) and called me a liar. I defended myself for a moment and then, seeing the futility, walked away. She kept bitching for some time afterwards. Mary tried to reason with us and ask me why and mediate, just like always, and I told her not to bother because I would leave so they could be married to each other. I am obviously the “third wheel” here. I am in the way of their relationship, so I must get out of the way. I am so sick of this whole thing but it really does hurt to think that my marriage is over because my wife would choose her mother over the vows she made to me. Anna was cussing and cursing me to no end the whole time. At least this time I had the presence of mind not to respond in kind.

I really love my wife. I want to spend the rest of my life with her, but I can’t remain in a three-way marriage, and there is no way Anna is going anywhere. Mary will cut her nose off to spite her face before that will ever happen. She will, once again, sacrifice herself so that her mother is happy, and her mother will keep on doing what she’s always done. Just another big unhappy codependent family that has gotten so good at deceiving everyone else that they now regularly deceive themselves. It breaks my heart to think that this is the end, that Anna has won and Mary and I have to lose. I was the child of a divorce and I hate to give up on a marriage just because certain people can’t (or won’t) let go, or change, but what am I to do? I have painted myself into a corner I don’t know how to get out of. I do not have the funds to just “walk away.” My father is in a similar situation with his partner. He hasn’t the resources to be on his own, so he is at her mercy (which isn’t much).

The tragedy here is that I can see underneath the shallow surface of Anna’s dark imprint upon Mary’s soul. I see the amazing woman she could be if things were different. Mary is full of passion and creativity; she has the wonder of a child, the beauty of an angel, and the strength of ten men. Her life has driven these things deep underground, but they are still there, waiting for the endless winter to pass; and the spring to arrive and let them bloom. I just wish I could be there to see it. I just hope Mary will be.

TANSTAAFL!

Bolero

2004-10-10T23:43:00.000-07:00

I never heard of him until I heard one of his works. Maurice Ravel is a composer born in the late 19th Century. Why his works remain unremarkable is a mystery to me. Listening to Bolero alone, I am mystified by his subtle genius. It is the same theme, played over and over again in increasing volume with more emphasis. The first is a drum beat, then a flute, then a clarinet, followed by a horn, and so on. As each different instrument picks up the tune, more join in to accompany it. The song goes on for more than 14 minutes repeating the same basic musical theme, but each rendition is different. I have the song on MP3, I could listen to it repeatedly. It is the song that allows me to finally “get” music. It is a metaphor for life, a repetitious march of routine that is carried out differently each and every time. That is the whole point of having a different instrument pick up the theme. It is inspiring and thrilling to find a piece of art that so defines one’s existence as to make them rejoice no matter what. This song does this for me. I would hope Maurice Ravel would approve.

TANSTAAFL!

Doom 3: Like Quintin Terantino’s Movies; Back to the Beginning with a Whole New Finish

2004-10-05T17:06:00.000-07:00

I remember the “good old days” when Doom was a free download from the Internet. Everyone I knew was playing it. It was a great game for taking out frustrations on: go blow away a few demons and everything seemed right with the world again. It beats the heck out of solitaire.

Doom was a pioneer in the world of FPS (First Person Shooters), it set the stage for so many more. A version of Castle Wolfenstein would be made using the Doom engine. Games like Quake and Unreal began to show up on the scene. It wasn’t long before we saw a game very close to the Doom premise called Half Life. Slightly more obscure, (but with a very vocal fan base) is the System Shock series. Most of these games owe something to Doom for setting the stage.

The Doom saga was recently resurrected with the much anticipated release of Doom 3. In this updated installment of the game, the player is immersed in a fully loaded back story and game world that is far more fleshed out than ever before. We see our stalwart Marine as he is stationed to a research facility on Mars, where the discovery of ancient ruins has led to scientific breakthroughs in teleportation. The problem? Teleporting doesn’t seem to set well with the test subjects. Repeated exposure seems to create a sense of dementia and fear among them, and then there are the accidents...so many accidents that droves of personnel are requesting transfers out of Mars.

On the transport with our main character is an officer representing the Board of Directors for the research facility along with his bodyguard. They have been dispatched to discover the cause of the recent accidents and requests for transfers. They have no idea what awaits them.

Our main character is indoctrinated and assigned to an older portion of the station, where one of the research team has gone missing. His orders are to find and return this individual, but just as it seems his mission is accomplished, a wave of energy comes spiraling out of the super secret Delta Labs; with it comes a nightmarish horror host of demonic creatures. People are snatched up and “possessed,” becoming zombies that feed on all that lives. Others are rent limb from limb. All hell breaks loose and the overwhelmed Marine security detachment is the first to combat the hoards, and the first to fall victim to it. Suddenly, the man our hero is sent to bring back attacks him, and he must kill or be killed. The rules have changed, now it is up to him to survive long enough to beat back this demonic invasion, lest it consume all of Mars and then...Earth.

The storyline is everything Doom should be. Of course it does not vary much from the original premise, but this is quickly forgotten in the intense game play, the puzzles, and the frightening shadows that conceal enemies from your view. Perhaps the only disappointment with Doom 3 is the puzzling decision to make it so the flashlight and weapons cannot be held simultaneously, something modern police and soldiers have been able to do for some time (I am certain someone on the design team must have known that modern weapons often include mounts for flashlights built right in, and failing this, night vision goggles are pretty much standard military issue these days). While this is a minor annoyance, it does not seriously detract from the gameplay or the effects, which are pretty stunning. The absolute popularity of the game series has already led to a "duct tape" mod, which attaches the flashlight to the gun so both can be used at the same time. The game plays out like any sci-fi horror movie should. The main character must find his way through a maze, battling hellish demonic creatures bent on stopping him, solving puzzles, getting around obstacles, and collecting ever more powerful weaponry, security codes, and access keys.

The designers seemed to have the original in mind when making this version. The game holds true to its predecessors, the arsenal of weapons is extremely familiar, with only one new weapon to add to the list. The monsters pop out from behind hidden panels, and the exits to the next level are essentially the same as the original. Scattered throughout the game are security lockers locked with combination codes that can only be discovered by collecting various PDA’s, which also provide the player with increased security access and information vital to the solution of the game. The PDA’s even have E-mail spam. There are plenty of “Easter Eggs” strewn throughout the game as well.

There is one major disappointment to this version of Doom: multiplayer is severely limited. It is obvious to me that the game designers chose to concentrate their efforts on making the single-player experience as exciting as possible, and this they achieved, but to neglect multiplayer is pretty huge in this age of online everything. I have to say that I am grateful there are still designers out there willing to put PC games out there when so many others are defecting to the world of consoles, but none-the-less, many die-hard gamers will feel Doom 3 is incomplete without a multiplayer that closely rivals its single-player experience.

Doom 3 is an experience that I am certain every battle-hardened Doom fan will want to own and play many times. The increased emphasis on storyline is much appreciated, as is the need for the player to think carefully, solve problems, and, of course, blow demons away. While the game suffers from some minor drawbacks and flaws, it manages to make up for them in the total experience.

And if anyone was wondering, yes, they are making a movie based on Doom, starring The Rock (Dwayne Johnson) as our hero is slated for release Summer '05. More about the upcoming Doom Movie.

TANSTAAFL!

Cake and Eat it Too's

2004-09-24T13:37:00.000-07:00

I’ve come to wonder a great deal about customer service in America. It seems as though somewhere along the way, we’ve forgotten the old axiom: “The customer is always right.”

Harkening back to “...The good old days...” when the customer/merchant relationship was generally an interpersonal one, the people that one relied on for basic goods and services were generally well-known and respected, and they were most likely the only person providing that particular good or service for miles around. That was then, this is now.

Now we have stores on every corner offering the same goods and services. We have mega-stores like Super Wal-Marts and Super K-Marts offering everything under one roof. With so many choices within easy reach, it seems as though there is little reason to worry about an individual customer anymore. People don’t seem to care so much about whether or not they keep customers because just like these venues, there seems to be an endless supply of them. Businesses providing goods and services seem to value volume customers rather than individual ones.

Wal-Mart led the way with its innovative stocking system. As purchases are made, the items purchased are recorded by a computer and sent over the company network to a distribution center, which automatically loads the trucks with replacements based upon those purchases. Most stores use this approach. If you are looking for something that is obscure or hard to find, chances are you will not find it at stores that use this approach: if it doesn’t sell, it doesn’t get stocked. Items that really don’t sell get discounted and are never heard from again. When the quest is desperate, its time to go looking for the small “Mom and Pop” stores. They are harder to find, but they are still out there.

As a homeowner, I spend some amount of time at the local Home Depot. Most of the time, when you ask one of the associates where some item is, they don’t know, they barely know whichever area they are responsible for themselves. The same is true of most of the large store chains. Occasionally, you’ll get the “expert,” but these people are usually so busy helping so many people, that the line forms to the left and never ends. Many of these people are busy restocking shelves or tending to tasks they were assigned by management. The volume of customers is so large that it is difficult for associates to complete their tasks while also trying to memorize the location of items throughout the store. Try calling a store to get information, they will call the department that is understaffed and overwhelmed, you’ll be lucky to get what you need. Companies and businesses don’t seem to put the same value in customer service anymore. They have become too big and too worried about profits to care about individual customer needs. They do such a volume of business that they can afford to let their reputation slip. For every

dissatisfied customer who walks out, three more customers walk in. Why should they care? Apathy is rampant. Manners are a thing of the past. People want everyone to treat them like royalty, while they are allowed to get away with treating everyone else like shit. We have become a society based upon the “cake-and-eat-it-too” mentality. Not only do we demand it, we believe we deserve it without having earned it.

So just like any trend in America, this story has two sides. Perhaps customer service has declined because we have so much to choose from. Perhaps it is our own arrogant attitudes and apathy towards others as well. People expect the moon but don’t want to pay for the trip. Is it any wonder other nations see us as spoiled brats?

TANSTAAFL!

Veteran for John Kerry

2004-08-23T13:06:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, I took time out of my Sunday routine to attend an "informational meeting" of the Nevada Veterans for John Kerry organization at the local VFW. All the local news channels were there. As usual, being a Gulf War I vet, I was a minority. I would say that 2/3rds of those in attendance were Vietnam era veterans, with 1/3 of them from either the Korea or WWII eras. All told, there were some 100 people there. Some of them were members of the Democratic party, as well as a Nevada State Senator in attendance.

The information presented was primarily aimed at countering the Swift Boat Veterans for Truth (Bush) ad campaign that has been a hot news item for several weeks. I find it ironic that veterans who served together and relied on each other for their very lives would choose to “politicize” who did what and whether or not they deserved medals for their actions. The primary accuser of Kerry states that he saw no small arms fire on the day Kerry claims to have won some of his medals, yet this accuser won a bronze star in the very same engagement...for coming under small arms fire. It seems rather unusual to me that the enemy would target just one swift boat out of many and not the rest of them. The debate over whether or not a person earned medals in combat is one that used to be sacrosanct. One did not question such things. Service in combat was honorable, especially when that service was voluntary. The people who have tried so desperately to discount John Kerry’s war record were not members of Kerry’s crew in fact, they were not even members of John Kerry’s squadron, yet they apparently were there at the same time he was.

Perhaps these Bush supporters feel that Kerry betrayed them by coming back from the war and speaking out against it. I tend to think that Kerry’s experience made him uniquely qualified to comment on that war. I would also like to think that Kerry played some small role in President Nixon’s decision to withdraw us from Vietnam. Whether drafted or volunteer, the men and women who went to Vietnam and did their duty deserve just as much support and thanks as all the men and women who have served our nation honorably, just as those men and women who are serving in Iraq today. For them, there can be no conflict concerning service, duty, and honor. They must be there to do what they were trained to do because their lives, the lives of their comrades, and the spirit of their nation depends upon that level of resolve. For it is the members of our armed forces who are willing to do their duty which provides the rest of us with the luxury of discussing, debating, and protesting whether or not a war is justified.

Perhaps our political leaders blundered in Vietnam. Perhaps we had no business there. I am not going to try to “second-guess” a war, much of which was waged before I was born. I served in Operation Desert Shield/Storm. In this instance, we had broad-based international support to kick the Iraqis back across their own border and liberate Kuwait. We did not press this attack and march into Baghdad. Goals and objectives were set, and then met. Once the operation was over, we withdrew our forces. From the very start, we knew why we were there and what we were doing. There was no need for us to “occupy” the enemy country. There was no desire to oust the “regime” and install our own “puppet government.” There was no misleading the American people with talk of “imminent danger” due to “weapons of mass destruction.” There were simply clearly specified objectives and a rapid outcome.

I do not wish to compare the service records of George W. Bush with that of John Kerry. Both served their country in one capacity or another, however, there is one important difference that I feel I must point out. One of these men has seen combat firsthand, the other has not. If I were serving in Iraq at this very moment, who would I want making the decision as to whether placing me in harm’s way is a sound one? Which one of these men has at least been shot at, and has shot back? Who is more likely to consider the deployment of troops with more care, concern, and compassion? I would want someone who understood what it meant to be in combat, and understood that there is no such thing as “civilized warfare.” I would want someone who considers the use of troops as a “last resort” rather than a “first response.”

We were not there when a young Navy Lieutenant and his swift boat crew did what they did. We have no idea what transpired. We have only the accounts of witnesses who were there. The people closest to John Kerry in those moments seem to confirm a situation in which he acted bravely and without hesitation. The man whose life he saved also states quite clearly that John Kerry acted selflessly and honorably. How is it that people who were right there in the thick of the action can relate one accounting while others who were not can have another?

I believe that these “Swift Boat Veterans for Bush” have made their choice. Perhaps they are counting on besmirching Kerry's war record to cover the fact that George W. Bush doesn't have one. Perhaps some will see this choice as beneficial to some “greater good.” I suspect that many more will see it as a betrayal of brothers-in-arms for nothing more than selfish political gain. Regardless of the outcome, it is a sad day for our nation when veterans "suddenly" decide to degrade and dispute the actions of fellow servicemen years afterwards. We must return to a time when the service of veterans is not questioned, but honored for what it stands for: men and women standing up to be counted when their nation needed them most. Anything less tarnishes the memory of those who gave their lives so we could be free.

The Kerry-Edwards Campaign Website

John Kerry Veteran's Outreach Site

Smear Boat Veterans for Bush

The "swift boat" veterans attacking John Kerry's war record are led by veteran right-wing operatives using the same vicious techniques they used against John McCain four years ago.

Kerry blasts Bush over veterans' ad. Says president allows others to do 'dirty work'

Speak Out about Swift Boat Veterans' Lies

Swift Boat Veterans for Truth

Swift Boat Veterans for Truth (SBVT) is an organization formed in 2004 by opponents of John Kerry'sU.S. presidential campaign. Their primary projects have been: their website, the book "Unfit for Command: Swift Boat Veterans Speak Out Against John Kerry", and television advertisements challenging John Kerry's military record and activism against the Vietnam War.

Shame on the swift boat veterans for Bush

I came to know Lt. John Kerry during the spring of 1969. He and his swift boat crew assisted in inserting our Special Forces team and our Chinese Nung soldiers into operational sites in the Cau Mau Peninsula of South Vietnam. I worked with him on many operations and saw firsthand his leadership, courage and decision-making ability under fire.
On March 13, 1969, John Kerry's courage and leadership saved my life.

The Swift Boat Veterans for Truth are not really interested in the truth. If they were, they would be condemning Bush--not Kerry.

TANSTAAFL!

I've Got Your Back John Kerry!

2004-07-30T12:43:00.000-07:00

Posted to http://blog.johnkerry.com/ John Kerry's Blog

I am a 6 year veteran of the U.S. Navy who served proudly from 1988 to 1994, including service in Operation Desert Shield/Storm. Nothing made me feel prouder to support John Kerry than his introduction by Max and his inclusion of the men who served with him in Vietnam.

My family was very much like John Kerry's family in that someone in every generation has answered the call of duty to country. Counting both sides of my family, I can find an ancestor who served going all the way back to the French and Indian War.

I fear for my country right now more than ever. We are living in difficult times. I do not believe our country can withstand another four years of corporate dominance and whimsical warfare. Gunboat diplomacy is not the way to build world unity, it is the way to build global division, and it plays right into the hands of our enemies. We cannot afford to alienate our allies and further antagonize our enemies.

We have lost touch with the spirit that helped forge our nation. We no longer remember the sweat, the back breaking work, and the sacrifice our forefathers endured so that we could live free. We must return to the value of hard work, ingenuity, and achievement that made us the greatest economic force this world has ever known. We cannot do this if we keep allowing corporations to move to places where the labor and taxes are cheaper.

We can win this one, but we have to stand together to do it. We must put down the issues that divide us and concentrate instead on the issues that unite us. As far as I'm concerned, I've got your back John Kerry! Let's go get 'em!

TANSTAAFL!

Fallout: Fahrenheit 9/11 Part 2

2004-07-04T10:25:00.000-07:00

For those of you who have not seen this movie- there are “spoilers” in this work.

I have seen this movie now. Perhaps it is because of preconceived notions I tried to keep from being a factor that I find myself agreeing with much of it. It did not have the level of sensationalism that some of Moore’s previous works had. It laid out a pretty convincing paper trail to tie the Bush family to the Saudis and, specifically, to the Bin Laden family.

We start out with the 2000 Presidential Election: a celebration of Al Gore’s victory in Florida. Then we all remember how Florida somehow went from blue, to red as if by “magic.” Then Moore has us consider the fact that the Governor of Florida is Jeb Bush, and that the Secretary of State for Florida was a member of the Bush campaign, who hired an independent company to strike names from the roles of registered voters, many of whom were stricken because they were likely to not vote for George W. Bush. George W. Bush was highly confident that he would win Florida, even when all the analysts and projections placed it clearly in the “blue.”

We see a joint session of Congress, presided by then Vice-President Gore. In order to question the results of the Florida elections, a member of the House of Representatives and a member of the Senate must put in writing, and sign, a request for inquiry. As many as 10 members of the House of Representatives did make such a written request. . .but they could not get one Senator to sign them. Not one single Senator would ask for the kind of investigation that might have uncovered the truth.

Michael Moore discusses George W. Bush’s records from the Texas Air National Guard. The ones he released to the public in 2002 had a name blotted out with black marker. Moore had already obtained an unblotted copy of this record prior to its release, and he revealed this name: the other person besides George W. Bush to be suspended for failure to take his annual flight physical. This person would be influential in Bush’s future as a businessman and as a political leader.

The man was an attorney representing a wealthy Saudi family that wished to invest in American oil interests. It did not seem to matter that this family comes from perhaps the largest oil producing country in the world. Perhaps they wished to diversify. Once such company the Saudis invested in was a small oil drilling outfit run by George W. Bush. This company had a reputation for drilling a lot of dry holes. No surprising that Dubya ran the company into the ground. No evidence exists to support that Bush Jr. got any money from his father to start this company. The only source of money that was found was from a series of small investors, and one big Saudi company known as The Bin Laden Family Group.

Just after this failure. Bush Sr. was elected President. Bush Jr. was offered a seat on the board of directors for a large group of investors in Texas, who mysteriously got involved in a number of Saudi investments just afterwards. Conjecture indicates that adding the President’s son to the BOD was a strategic move that allowed these investments to occur.

After his four-year stint in the White House, Bush Sr. became a member of the Carlyle Group, another prestigious investment group with strong ties to Middle Eastern oil. Bush Sr. made many trips to Saudi Arabia as a representative of this firm. Among the people he met with regularly were members of the Bin Laden family. Bush Jr. would join his father in the Carlyle group for a time, before leaving to run for governor of Texas.

While Bush Jr. was governor of Texas, a group of Arabs from Afghanistan came to Houston to meet with a company called Unical 76. These men were members of The Taliban. Discussions were held to build a natural gas pipeline that would run through Afghanistan. Bush Jr. played a part in facilitating these talks. Contracts were arranged and signed, but the work was stalled by a number of complications. Ironically, since the United States sent troops to Afghanistan and removed the Taliban from power, the new President of Afghanistan is one of the former liaisons between Unical 76 and the Taliban. Guess what they’re building in the Afghan desert?

Bush is appointed to the Presidency of the United States. For the first eight months of his term, he spends 42% of his time on vacation. A security report is delivered to Bush on his Crawford Texas ranch that indicated Al-Qaeda may try to hijack planes in the United States. The FBI and the CIA had information that cells of the terror network were in the U.S. and they were attending flight schools. Whether Bush ever read this report or not doesn’t seem to matter much.

On September 11th, 2001, George W. Bush was at an elementary school in Florida listening to students read from My Pet Goat. The President was informed of the first plane hitting the World Trade Center. He continued to participate with the students. He was informed of the second plane hitting the World Trade Center, and that the United States was under attack. He continued to participate with the students for another 7 minutes. Perhaps he was waiting to get more information. Perhaps he was waiting for his advisors to tell him what to do. Perhaps he was waiting for the Secret Service to jump in and extract him. Perhaps he just wasn’t surprised at all.

The first thing that was done was to authorize 142 Saudi Arabians to fly out of the country “for their own protection.” Among them were members of the Bin Laden family. Nearly 3,000 Americans were dead. American travelers were stranded all over the country because their planes were grounded. Foreigners and Americans were detained for months without being charged for a crime, having access to a lawyer, or a speedy trial. Despite all this, 142 Saudi Arabians get to fly out of the country just two days after the worst attack on American soil ever? This was a criminal investigation. In criminal investigations, one of the first things police do is question friends and family of the victim(s) and suspect(s).

Within months of the attack, the U.S.A. Patriot Act sails through Congress without a whimper. It is then we learn that the majority of the members of the House and Senate do not read these laws. They don’t have time. Perhaps they have legal assistants that highlight and summarize them. The U.S.A. Patriot Act gives the FBI and other agencies broad powers to spy on anyone they suspect of being a terrorist, or being affiliated with terrorist acts. The definition of “terrorist” is deliberately vague. Several provisions of this law have already been struck down as unconstitutional.

I remember when John Ashcroft came through Las Vegas stumping for U.S.A Patriot Act II. He invited only members of law enforcement. He did not allow the press to cover the event. He did not want to debate the issue with concerned citizens who want to know how this will make them safer, why? Because he doesn’t care about what the people think, or are concerned with. He wants to increase his agency’s ability to defy the U.S. Constitution and legally spy on anyone he wants to. Let us not forget that John Ashcroft is a man who ran for Senate from the State of Missouri, and lost to a dead man, only to be appointed to the top law enforcement position in our nation.

The pieces of this puzzle continue to fit into place. Bush’s own terrorism experts are pressured to “find” Iraqi involvement in the 9/11 attacks. Bush begins to play up the fact that Saddam Hussein has continually defied U.N. resolutions to disarm, despite the fact that he himself, and Secretary of State Powell, and National Security Advisor Condoleza Rice had all indicated that Iraq did NOT have WMD’s the year before.

Despite the lack of U.N. Support for an invasion of Iraq, Bush sent troops there anyway. No WMD’s have been found to date. What has been found is a lack of sanitation, a lack of fresh water, a lack of consistent electricity, and a populace that is as terrified with American occupation as they seemed to be when Saddam ruled there. The numbers of civilian casualties in Iraq is scary, but we didn’t hear about that. We heard: “Mission Accomplished.” Moore shows American soldiers prior to going into combat. Many of them were boys barely old enough to shave. They were excited, they were ready. They were more than willing to do their jobs. After they had seen true combat, they were men and the look in their eyes changed from one of eagerness, to one of true horror.

The most melodramatic moment in the movie came at the expense of a woman whose son was killed in Iraq. Before this, she never questioned the leadership of this country. She supported the troops. She supported George W. Bush. Then she got his letters, and her son was questioning why he was there. They weren’t liberators, they were conquerors. The majority of Iraqis do not want the Americans there. They inflicted just as much suffering, horror, and sadness upon the Iraqi people as Saddam did. But we never found this out. The news media played up the success of the invasion. They played up the celebrations of the Iraqi people freed from under the boot of Saddam. In a final demonstration of just how “spun” the whole thing is, the leadership of this country did not allow the showing of the flag draped coffins coming back from Iraq.

There was a portion of the movie devoted to Moore asking members of the House and Senate if they would like to enlist their sons and daughters in the military so they could help out in Iraq, as it turns out that only one member of Congress has a son in the military who is in Iraq. Moore couldn’t find any Senators or Congressmen who seemed eager to enlist their children, but these same people don’t seem to have any problem sending the sons and daughters of poor and underprivileged families to fight and die.

The “icing” on this cake was a convention hosted by the U.S. Government to encourage corporate investments in rebuilding Iraq. There was a lot of talk about “...once the oil starts flowing again, there will be plenty of money to be made.” It also seems ironic that we are seeing one of the highest gas prices in history, as if the members of OPEC know that as soon as Iraqi oil starts to flow freely once more, they are going to start losing market share.

For those of you who still believe George W. Bush has the best interests of this nation in mind, I don’t think anything is going to change your minds. I think your blind loyalty to a man whose sole interest is power and profits have been sadly misled; but I also believe you are willing to go down with the ship rather than admit you might be wrong. I believe that it would be too painful to break ranks with a political party that has done nothing but dupe you. Ignorance is bliss, and we shouldn’t question our leaders, we should trust them, isn’t that right?

For those of you who are ready to wake up and recognize that our nation has been taken advantage of, that our people have been horribly fooled, that our leadership is not interested in the welfare of the people, but in the welfare of their own bank accounts, then you will find something to cheer about. I went to a 4:40 PM showing of this movie. It was a packed house, and the people who were there applauded at the end. Maybe there is hope for us yet.

TANSTAAFL!

Fallout: Fahrenheit 9/11 Part 1

2004-07-02T12:10:00.000-07:00

Pre-Fahrenheit 9/11

I am going to see this movie with an open mind. I am attempting to hold my preconceived notions concerning Michael Moore at bay. There is no doubt that he has a tendency towards melodramatics, sensationalism, and hyperbole whenever it suits his purpose. Despite this, Michael Moore has managed to provide us with something we most desperately need: an alternate perspective to the ones we are getting from the corporate-sponsored news media and our own government. If his works do nothing more than get us to think for ourselves, speak out, and act according to our consciences, then they will have served a greater purpose. I have my own ideas concerning the “War on Terror,” and our invasion of Iraq. I have supported our troops for carrying out their orders to the best of their ability, but I seriously question the justifications our leadership used to order them there.

Michael Moore makes at least one good point: Change cannot be enforced at the point of a gun. A revolution must come from within, by the will of the people. If their own people are not willing to give their blood, sweat, and tears to tear down tyranny and oppression and build up their own government with their own hands, no country on earth is going to do it for them. Successful nations have been forged only when the people rise up and speak with one voice. Every time a country has tried to force revolution upon another country, it has failed miserably. What would I have done in George W. Bush's place? I would have incited the people of Iraq to organize and overthrow Saddam themselves. Then they would have real ownership in building a new democratic Iraq. What they have is the facade of "propped up” officials mouthing their words from Washington. If some of Moore's commentary is over the top, then at least on this point, he rings true.

What we doubt, and what we must carefully consider, is the conditions under which we went into Iraq. We were told by our leadership that Iraq posed a "...Imminent threat to the United States." We were given the impression that Saddam Hussein was in league with Al-Qaeda. We were told that Iraq had the means, and was actively seeking to expand upon those means, to unleash Weapons of Mass Destruction against the U.S. and its neighbors. We were told that the policy of containment and inspections was not working, and many people questioned our very membership in the UN: an organization chartered to help find diplomatic and peaceful alternatives to war. We know all too well how to destroy. We know all too well how to take lives. We have yet to learn how to stop others from destroying and taking lives without responding in kind. Our leadership "pooh-poohed" the majority of its allies and the UN and is now offended that these allies will not join in a unified front to rebuild Iraq?

The United States invaded the sovereign nation of Iraq under false pretenses. We cannot pull out now. George W. Bush and his cronies have made certain of that. Regardless of our stated intentions or justifications, we have no right to go around the world invading other countries just because we don't like them. Might does not make right. We spend trillions of dollars a year in other countries and ignore our own schoolchildren, homeless, and poor.

The greatest fallacy that has been overlooked and suppressed by the Pro-Bush folks is that there are no innocents in war. There are always civilian casualties who get caught in the crossfire. There are always senseless deaths and barbaric slaughter involved no matter how noble or moral the cause might be. At its core, war is an evil and dirty business in which people intentionally set upon killing other people they don't even know, often for reasons they cannot begin to fathom. At what cost have we invaded Iraq? How are they better than they were under Saddam? We detain, humiliate, and torture their people. Their basic services, such as electricity, water, and sewage, are sporadic at best. Their country is filled with insurgents and terrorists looking to cause further disruptions and chaos. We beat on the hornets nest, and now we're going to have to deal with getting stung.

Saddam was a two-bit thug with delusions of grandeur. The United States under Reagan supported Saddam in his war with Iran. We gave him weapons. We gave him money. We helped him build up his power base. Our government has been the willing accomplice to much of Saddam's atrocities.

Our nation's foreign policy in the latter 20th Century is rife with examples of "moral relativism," we have supported terrorists, thugs, dictators, gangsters, and drug runners on the justification that we were "...Fighting the commies." We took the position of: "The enemy of my enemy is my friend," and turned a blind eye to the horrors these people committed. Osama Bin Laden received weapons, funds, and training from the CIA. The Shah of Iran brutally ruled over his people, yet when they revolted and threw him out, the United States and Great Britain aided in reinstalling him. While his people suffered the anguish of war, the King of Kuwait was living it up in a posh hotel in Saudi Arabia. We have consistently armed and funded Israel despite the fact that they have become no better than the thugs who tried to exterminate them in WWII. This is just one region of the world. I haven't mentioned our dirty dealings in Europe, Central America, South America, Africa, or Asia. The U.S. has a history of meddling in places it ought not to be for reasons that are dubious at best.

I love my country, but I am ashamed of what our leadership has done in its name. We need to take care of our own house before we go telling the rest of the world how to mind theirs.

I will of course follow this up with a Post-Fahrenheit 9/11 article.

TANSTAAFL!

July

2004-06-27T01:49:00.000-07:00

I was in college over the summer. I worked in the computer lab, and I lived in the dorms that summer. My answering machine spoke the words of an angel in great sadness. I knew the song of sorrow she sang. She was pregnant and I was the father.

I remember the night it happened as if it were yesterday. We were drinking with a friend of mine from school. He favored “E & J” Brandy. Despite having many years as a sailor living all over the world, I had not developed a strong tolerance for brandy. I don’t plan to ever drink it again.

Afterwards, a stumble, fumbling walk to my dorm room barely awoke me. My girlfriend and I were free to “find knowledge” of each other for the entire weekend. But I was only partially erect from drinking all those straight brandies. The condom did not fit correctly. Our love became heated and I remember the sensation becoming magnificent and not realizing why, because the next moment, I spent.

Moments passed. I felt myself breathe, I heard her breathe, and then I noticed my penis was wet, not the condom, but directly from the woman naked next to me; the woman who would become my wife.

The next day, we were meeting her mother at a restaurant not far from us. I looked at her, driving the car, and I knew. I can’t say what it was. I can only explain that I knew she was pregnant, and it happened the night before because of me. I knew.

Mid-June to Mid-July. She knew I wasn’t in my room. She left a message on my answering machine anyway. It sounded frightened and uncharacteristically upset from the tone I had come to know, both passionately, and affectionately.

I had known the day it happened. She was afraid I would abandon her. I did no such thing. I held her. I cried with her. We had taken precautions and they had failed. I was about to become a father, and she, a mother. I was in my Junior year of college. I was making plans to join the Coal Barges on the local river. My personal history was poised to repeat itself: if math and time be correct, then a bastard I am. I was conceived before (the reason) my parents wed.

My existence is powerful. My existence redirected the course of a man and a woman. Because they were becoming adults in the 1960’s, they were young adults by the end of that decade. They were innocent and immature, but my very existence drove them to become very much more worldly and grown up. I was not really the catalyst. My parents’ lust was. I am nothing but the product of young and inexperienced lust given expression.

Do I despair my existence as much as the preceding paragraph indicates? No. I am here. I exist. Regardless of my impact on my parents. I happened, they chose to try and stay together because of this. Before they chose to part, they chose to create an amazing baby girl who would become my sister.

By the time I was 8, my parents had drifted out of each others’ orbits. My father had reached the age where he knew how to charm and please a woman without trying, and he could not help himself. My mother caught him in the company of his mistress in a restaurant and gave him the ultimatum: “Come now with me and the kids, or stay here and we’re done.” He made his bed. He never wanted to sleep for years after that.

I remained loyal to my father despite evidence to the contrary. As far as I was concerned, he was a god. Not even my mother (the goddess) could convince me otherwise.

I defended him and resented my step-father despite the truth: My stepfather taught me how to be a man, not my father. It would take years for me to really realize the truth of that sentence. I still haven’t told him that. Perhaps he wouldn’t believe me. I’ll be sending this to both my father and stepfather. What they make of it is their business.

History repeating itself. This young, frightened woman 7 days younger than me was devastated. She had the burden of years of hard work to provide and please those who watched over her. She could not prove unworthy of that burden to anyone, even someone who stood by her like I did. Yet here she was, at the dawn of motherhood, convinced I would leave her to face the day alone. It took me a while to convince her that I was willing to hold the days and nights in my hands, and count them as if they were the first gulp of water after 100 days in the desert heat. Despite this deep and moving metaphor, she brought the pregnancy test she had peed on and showed it to me. I was more impressed by the yellow “splotch pattern.” than the “symbol” that confirmed my status.

If you remember far enough back, I already knew. I knew the night it happened. I told her she was “glowing” that very day and why she seemed that way. She had taken my seed, and her sacred “Garden of Eden” had begun to blossom. I was in awe of her, as she unknowingly took on all the attributes of the “Goddess” who once carried me beneath her heart.

I was ready. When she realized and explained that we were not ready. I knew we had to take action. We made plans to go down town to Pittsburgh, to the clinic, and “take care” of this.

Before we could do this, we had to get through the last week of Summer Camp...not as one of the kids, but as counselors. She was able to keep things even in the day, but every night, she collapsed in my arms in a shivering, sobbing, desperate, lost-little girl. Whatever it took to dry those tears and stop those heaves, I was going to go through hell and back to make it come true.

She was bleeding. She was complaining of horrific cramps. She was pregnant. I didn’t hesitate. I got her into the car and took her 20 miles away, so we could use an “assumed name” without anyone knowing. She was hemorrhaging. She was taken back into the back by herself. She told them I was her husband, she used my name. She wasn’t afraid to use it, I wasn’t as afraid of hearing her say it. That was the beginning of my thoughts to marry this woman, because come Hell or High Water, the “next one” was “for keeps!” She was miscarrying. Neither of us would ever know our child. It was blood soaked into “super absorbance.”

We celebrated the miscarriage. We went all over the place, including to the closest Borders Book Shop in our area. Who should we meet? My mother. We both blanched at the thought of the previous few hours. The walk through the tall sentinels of grey and glass. We were greeted at the door: “Mom, Dad, and Think about what you’re doing!” The woman who would be my wife burst into tears. Then she whimpered. She cried. I held her, clenching my teeth and fists, I held her.

They came and called her back. There was some sort of music coming from the protesters down below. I couldn’t figure out what it was, but it had the sound of “righteousness” and I knew it was anti-choice advocates, offering their self-important prayers and pity. It was saddening to see another human being, who had no experience, or right, to judge another being who shit the same as he did, who pissed the same as he did, and had the same desires as he did. I angered over anyone who acted moralistic and uttered any kind of egotistical superiority over women from that day forward. I was angry at Christianity for the crimes of a few brainwashed morons.

I fell asleep for the first time in four days. I slept fitfully the whole time she was gone. It felt like an eternity. There was no way I was going to leave that clinic without this amazing woman.

She came out with a smile that felt out of place. She wasn’t pregnant! She had miscarried the week before. They refunded our money. We left, hand-in-hand. We would marry less than three years later, our relationship having “cemented” several summers before.

(I still have the bullet I chewed in half from those days if you’re interested).

J.S.Brown

Written after our Fifth Wedding Anniversary, and nearly Seven years since “July.”

TANSTAAFL!

The Laws of Propaganda

2004-06-25T11:37:00.000-07:00

Truth is perception.

Perception can be manipulated.

Loyalty can be bought.

Opposition can be suppressed

Scapegoats are easy to come by.

Religious fervor is easily corrupted.

Convince the masses your cause is a "great moral crusade" and they'll follow you anywhere.

Know your audience and tell them exactly what they want to hear.

Manipulate truth by repeating the same information until it becomes the truth.

Manipulate truth through statistics.

Manipulate truth by distracting the masses with an overabundance of trivial information.

Omit certain details and the truth becomes whatever you say it is.

Give the people reasons to fight amongst themselves over petty issues. Divide and conquer.

Disguise ignorance as information and people will think themselves aware.

The more sensational the story, the easier it is to make the people believe it.

A single appeal to emotion trumps100 facts.

Information presented as “scientific data” will be taken at face value.

Keep the masses in a fluctuating state of fear and you can justify any action you wish.

Turn patriotism into the “state religion,” and the people will gladly turn in their own mothers for treason.

If the people believe you are “protecting” them, they will gladly give up their rights and freedoms.

TANSTAAFL!

The Soul of our National Spirit

2004-06-21T09:58:00.000-07:00

I was born at the end of the Baby Boom. Officially, I’m a member of Generation X. Despite this, I’ve somehow retained a sense of romanticism and sentimentality for the eras I missed. Much of this is due to the stories told to me by my father and stepfather about Major League Baseball when they were boys.

The league minimum salary for baseball players was just $6,000.00 throughout the 1960’s. Men who played the game then played it not because they were well paid, but because they loved every aspect of the game they played. In a time when ball players make six and seven figures, it is hard to imagine what kind of a thrill it would be to see the “big names” coming out to play for the sheer love of it. Perhaps the large salaries haven’t changed the fundamental love of the game, perhaps they have, but as long as money is made such a large portion of the equation, the question will always be there.

The first time I went to Yankee Stadium was 1981. I was 11 years old. The smells of the Bronx mingled with the smells of peanuts, beer, hotdogs, and then...the light at the end of the tunnel opened up upon a magnificent cathedral of baseball. The wide expanse of well-maintained green, the freshly raked dirt, and the white lines stretching outward made me realize that I was not just in any ballpark, I was in the ballpark. Here was the spirit of Babe Ruth, of Joe DiMaggio, of Mickey Mantle. This was the place where baseball was made holy for all time. There are plenty of other Major League ballparks and great teams, but the Yankees were the team that defined baseball in the 20th Century. Historically, no other team has won more Pennants or World Series than the New York Yankees. No other team has given the country so many heroes to call their own.

That day in 1981 has left an indelible mark upon me. Even though I moved from Upstate New York to Pittsburgh in 1984, I never forgot what that was like. There is no doubt that I was happy to have Three Rivers Stadium as close as a bus ride away, but it was a stadium that was born the same year I was, it had no history before that. I remember one summer several years later when I was in college, my mother sent me a newspaper clipping photo of the last time Roberto Clemente was at-bat at Forbes Field; it was the day I was born. I still have that clipping. Three Rivers Stadium had its own charm, but it wasn’t the same thing as a ballpark that had stood for nearly a century. Now even Three Rivers Stadium has become nothing but a memory, yet Yankee Stadium endures.

Baseball has faded a bit in the fast-paced world of the Information Age. As the world has grown smaller, people have lost patience with a game that unfolds oblivious to time. Baseball has always been a game that collected its fair share of memorable moments, while demanding that fans also bear witness to the routine. As with so many other human endeavors; in order to see us at our best, we have to be willing to sit through the everything else as well. These days, it seems just catching the highlights is good enough for many.

Baseball defined this nation. It defined our hearts and our souls. It gave us something to hope for; it gave us something to come together on a summer afternoon and it gave us something to believe in. The loss of this identity with baseball has meant the loss of something quintessential in the American consciousness. It isn’t so much the loss of moral values or manners that has caused our country to decline; it is the loss of baseball.

“People will come, Ray. They'll come to Iowa for reasons they can't even fathom. They'll turn into your driveway, not knowing for sure why they're doing it. They'll arrive at your door, as innocent as children, longing for the past. "Of course, we won't mind if you look around," you'll say, "It's only twenty dollars per person." And they'll pass over the money without even thinking about it: for its money they have and peace they lack.

And they'll walk off to the bleachers and sit in their short sleeves on a perfect afternoon. And find they have reserved seats somewhere along the baselines where they sat when they were children. And cheer their heroes. And they'll watch the game, and it'll be as they'd dipped themselves in magic waters. The memories will be so thick; they'll have to brush them away from their faces.

The one constant through all the years, Ray, has been baseball. America has rolled by like an army of steamrollers. It's been erased like a blackboard, rebuilt, and erased again. But baseball has marked the time. This field, this game, is a part of our past, Ray. It reminds us of all that once was good, and that could be again. Oh people will come, Ray. People will most definitely come.”

Terrence Mann (James Earl Jones): Field of Dreams

TANSTAAFL!

How We Choose to Honor The Dead

2004-06-11T10:13:00.005-07:00

According to my Mother-in-law, I'm unpatriotic and a bad American because I think that Ronald Reagan's service is overly melodramatic facade. IMHO, rather than celebrating his life and achievements, they are glorifying one man above their own belief in God. It seems as though they are turning the whole affair into idolatry: worshipping an image, figure, or statue before God, which would be a direct violation of the First Commandment.

It is a human flaw to see any one human being as somehow better than another. We are all the same "stuff." We all have the same potential to be saints or sinners. We all have the ability to become great leaders of goodness, or great leaders of evil. Honoring a life and a legacy of service to one's country should be done not with pomp and circumstance, but with honest subdued humility and silence. It is not necessary to make a person seem even greater than they were to honor them. Simply honor them. That's all.

As far as my Mother-in-law is concerned, I should keep my disloyal and disrespectful thoughts to myself. I should simply turn the channel and ignore the ceremony in silence if I do not agree with it. After all, who am I to judge? She sees me as a failure trying to disgrace a great man (Ask her any other time, and she will say that Ronald Reagan did nothing to help her when she was desperate and poor. Now that he's died, he's transcended sainthood).

My Mother-in-law is a staunch FDR Democrat who was raised during the Great Depression, but she sees Regan now as a "Father of our country" along with all the others who came before him. She thinks I have disgraced my service to my country and if any of my bosses knew how I felt, they would fire me in an instant for being so disloyal and disrespectful to my country and its people. She comes from an era where people did not question authority and respected all ceremony as sacred. I wonder what her reaction will be if they attempt to replace FDR's image on the dime with Reagan's.

Even if all this pomp and pageantry is meant for some purpose I cannot fathom, I find it repugnant that anyone would want their life to be so distorted and one-sided. Reagan was not perfect. His decisions were not always the greatest. He played a pivotal role in a controversial time, but that doesn't make him anything more than a human being. Let's remember him not for just the good things he did, but everything he did. Let's remember him as a complete person, not just a partial one. Let us forsake the ego in favor of something greater than the sum of our parts.

This ceremony provides politicians with yet another method of winning the hearts and minds of their constituents to their cause. They have used it as both a distraction from the other events of the day, and as propaganda for their own purpose. While we are taking the time to morn the passing of Ronald Reagan, other people are suffering and dying all over the world, and yet we do not blink twice about that. Our collective attentions are so focused in on the grandness of the National Cathedral in Washington D.C. that the rest of the world could blow up and nobody would notice. One human being can make a difference, but no one human being should become so all important that we lose the ability to remember that we are all one human being.

This demonstration provides us with yet another example of how impossible it is to separate religion from politics. They are entwined at the very roots of humanity. They speak the same language and the lines are deliberately blurred so that many people would never realize they had crossed one for the other. Religion was the first organized political system. All other political systems grew out of theocratic orders. As long as we hold onto the idea that we can somehow mix the two, we will never be able to stop warring amongst ourselves over idealology, economics, power, and greed. I only hope we can outgrow this before it is too late.

Ronald Reagan deserves to be honored as a statesman, a leader, an entertainer, and ultimately, as the 40th United States President. Of this I have no complaint. What I have seen in the past week from the media and from ceremonies all over the world is something that does nothing to help the human condition, rather it takes everything that is good about it away. When we make one man out to be greater than he is, we diminish ourselves in the process.

TANSTAAFL!

Life in the New Economy

2004-05-16T11:22:00.000-07:00

Nothing to do but yawn
Waiting for Godot
Too much time on my hands
But never enough to make it worth my while

Caught in the endless HR shredder
Cut by players who don’t even know the game
Never getting past the gate
Never getting a foot in the door

A prisoner of economics
In line for a handout
While others starve
Still others thrive

No rhyme or reason
No logic to the scheme
Survival has no purpose
Only purpose found in greed

Masturbation passing the time
The phone rings, but not for me
Resumes scattered to the four winds
Cover letters shredded in the bin

Do what? Go Where? Meet Whom?
Nothing, Nowhere, No one.
Coffee stains and business cards
Symbolic execution

Something has to give
Make me an offer
I’ll be the sacrificial lamb
Gleefully led to the slaughter

Answers and questions
Interviews in pressed suits
Dry Cleaning tag still attached
Unnoticed, unbidden

Envelopes, fax machines, E-mails
The market pays no attention
News rumors transformed to fact
Perception is greater than fiction

Nothing new, something old
Nothing blue, something borrowed
No light at the end of the tunnel
Just another train

Keep beating around the Bush
Urination of silver spoon economics
Bully pulpit trickling down divine
Pure piss, now holy water, and wine

It isn’t as bad as it seems, after all
All is well, go about your business
Even if you have none to go about
Just pretend; it’s working for everyone else

Believe what you’re told
Why would we lie?
Don’t question us closely
Don’t call us, we won’t call you

Have a little faith
You too might be a fortunate son
Your fifteen minutes are up
That’s life in the new economy. . .

JSB
5-16-04

TANSTAAFL!

The Unemployment Blues

2004-05-04T12:07:00.000-07:00

I can’t remember the last time I shaved. What for? I’m not working and I’m not getting any interviews. I check the online job portals each day, and pick out the jobs I think I’m qualified for, but the only contact I get from most of them is an automated E-mail saying they received my application.

Without a job, my days are endless torture. Everything begins to blend together. I didn’t even realize it was May until I noticed it on an E-mail. I don’t sleep well at night. I’m not particularly worried, just unsettled. I am a man with no real purpose. It is very discouraging.

I (barely) graduated high school and had no idea what I wanted to do, so I took my stepfather’s advice and joined the Navy. After a four-year hitch, I thought it might be nice to teach high school. I went to college and got a teaching degree, but after two years as a teacher, it was painfully obvious that I would not survive another 28 years in that environment.

So I struck out on my own. I started over again from scratch. Computers have been a big part of my life, so I found a helpdesk nearby that paid $9.50 an hour, and included training. I worked there for nearly a year and then I moved onto another helpdesk that paid more. Then I got a contract gig as a field technician for a national pharmacy chain- installing all their computer equipment from the storefront server, to the cash registers, to the pharmacy server, and everything in between. It was a sweet deal. I installed 7 stores in a year, did some upgrades and repairs, and remained “on-call” 40 hours a week. There were weeks where I was paid to do nothing but sit and wait for my beeper to go off. Alas, this couldn’t last. After a year, the parent company severed its ties with the agency that held my contract and I was thrown into unemployment.

The sudden drop from my steady wages to unemployment compensation was a shock. It threw me into a deep depression. Finding work was next to impossible. I signed on with several contract-IT agencies in the area, and I kept applying to jobs right and left. I still have a bulletin board peppered with fax coversheets from jobs I applied to. At the end of 2002, I got a temp-job as a field technician for a nationally recognized computer company. It was only $12.00 an hour, and it was 35 hours a week, but it was better than unemployment. I ran around town in my own car replacing parts.

This didn’t last very long. The expenses of keeping my car running, and dealing with irate customers eventually forced me to seek life elsewhere. Luckily, one of those IT-temp agencies found me a contract gig working as an IT Customer Support Specialist for a local courthouse, they were undergoing a new case-management software implementation and they needed someone with strong computer skills to help make that happen. I discussed my experiences there in a previous posting-long story short: my duties were not specific, management was not in total agreement over the software, and it seemed like people were always quitting, transferring out, or getting fired. Not the ideal environment. I worked very hard for over a year, and thought I was making a difference...only to be invited out to lunch by my case managers to be told my contract was being released. Further developments caused the parent company to decide they could no longer have me represent them. My direct employer did not give any specific reasons, but then, they didn’t have to. My guess is that a recently hired department head didn’t care for my “style,” and decided to make some changes. I complained to the parent company about my treatment, and lack of support, and won a puric victory: unemployment compensation.

Since then, I’ve been going to bed later, and getting up later. I spent the first few weeks sending out resumes and cover letters like a madman. Eventually, with no responses at all, I sunk into a deep depression. My wife is beside herself. I am ready to crawl out of my skin. I’m about 5 weeks into my first 13 weeks of unemployment compensation. I am pretty sure I can apply for, and get another 13 week extension if I had to, but UC has dropped my weekly income by more than 300 dollars. If it hadn’t been for my college loan refund, we’d be in serious financial trouble right now, and even that is only going to last so long. I feel as though I’m fighting a losing battle. I can only hold out so long and then the barbarians will storm the gates.

I’m trying to do some “odd-jobs” to help supplement my income. A lot of my wife’s colleagues need computer help, and I’ve made a modest amount of money helping them. I am having business cards made so I can hand them out to people. I am thinking about putting up some color flyers at the local supermarkets and wherever else I can to promote myself and see if I can’t go into business for myself. If it takes off, I’ll apply for a business license and the whole nine-yards.

In the meantime, I am hitting the job boards. I have automatic “agents” that send any jobs in the area to my E-mail on a daily basis. I also scan the “Help Wanted” section of the Sunday paper (better than the weekly editions). It seems like there are jobs out there, but I’m either unqualified or too qualified for them. My wife wants me to find a job...any job. She keeps coming up with ideas about me working at Home Depot, or Borders, or some other retail job. According to my calculations, in order to make more money than UC, I would have to get at least 10 dollars an hour. None of these places pay that much. Besides, I am sick of taking jobs to “hold me over,” I want a career. I wasn’t ready for computer science when I was in college; it took me several more years to understand the “mindset” necessary to develop applications.

The problem is that I have many of the skills, but no education or certifications. I am certain that most of my resumes and cover letters never make it past the HR filters. Most companies have some sort of human or automated process for scanning the content of resumes and cover letters looking for very specific key words. If those key words aren’t there, they “circular file” the resume and send you a: “...Thank-you-for-applying-and-we’ll-keep-your-resume-on-file...” letter. Additionally, I live in Las Vegas. One of the first questions on many applications: “Years in the gaming industry,” which of course, I have none. The casinos don’t hire IT folk off the streets very often. Usually, you have to “know someone” on the inside to get a job with them.

I am working on my master’s degree in Computer Information Systems Management. I am willing to bet if I were to take one of the Microsoft .NET exams and pass it, I would probably be in a better position to get hired. Of course, it would help if I actually opened those books and used them, but all my programming experience has come from actually having a need to create something that was meant to be used. Without a practical purpose, I have great difficulty staying focused on something. When the chips are down, and I have to create a working application for actual use, I can figure it out.

That’s the thing about computing that most people do not comprehend. Once you have been doing it for a while, going from one program or application to another is really not that hard, they generally all have the same basic features and functions. But people stubbornly insist that a person have demonstrated experience with whatever software or hardware they use. There is also a relative “glut” of IT professionals looking for work. Hiring companies can afford to be choosy, and they aren’t paying them the “big bucks” that the profession was used to only a few short years ago. Adding to this mess is the whole “outsourcing/off shoring” issue, and it is not exactly a good time to be looking for a job in IT.

I still believe I will find something. It’s all a matter of timing, opportunity, and effort. In the meantime, excuse me while I go mad for a while...

TANSTAAFL!

Hiatus Inturuptus: The Departure...and Return of Leo Laporte to TechTV

2004-04-23T17:03:00.000-07:00

Ok, I've been a baaad boy. I've allowed my personal problems to consume me and keep me from tending to my new blogging duties. I have long been a fan of Tech TV because of one of the people who had been there as long as I can remember: Leo Laporte, someone who has the innate ability to do as Aristotle taught us in Poetics "...To Teach, and To Please." He made us laugh, he taught us, and he inspired us to be more than we thought we could be. Without him, TechTV will go on, but it will be more of a rudderless ship with no lighthouse to guide it.

I didn't catch on right away. I began to notice that Leo was missing from his usual shows on a more frequent basis over the last few weeks. I was even impressed by the appearance of actor/writer Wil Wheaton as guest host for TechTV's Call For Help, but they're still using Leo's image as part of the opening credits and commercial break shots, not to mention the fact that he was mentioned by Wil and others on the show. It's as if they are all waiting for him to make a triumphant return.

This of course, is only because it turns out to be absolutely true! It appears that I am not the only one who values Leo as the "soul" of TechTV. Leo Himself attributes this to his loyal fan following, who bombarded TechTV with a lot of electronic criticism and concern over his departure. This has one guessing as to what's up with the management at Vulcan Ventures Programming, TechTV's soon-to-be ex-owners (as they just got bought out by Comcast).
Hopefully Comcast will be better able to appreciate Leo's value to TechTV than those bozos at Vulcan seem to.

Vulcan certainly doesn't seem to have a very clear idea of what makes good television, they show that rediculous Robot Wars so many freaking times a day, I sometimes want to make my own army of killer robots, and send them to do battle with Paul Allen and his cronies. Not to mention: why does TechTV have so many UK productions in the first place? As if the Brits have anything on us arrogant Americans when it comes to technology; hell, we INVENTED the freaking Internet, and we kicked those Brits back to England twice, not to mention bailing them out of two more wars to boot! Let the blimeys watch their BBC. We should have more American technology programming! Of course, I both digress and rant in a most ethnocentric manner.

Leo, I for one am glad to have you back where you belong. Now stay there!

TANSTAAFL!

Please Excuse me if I'm not Writing Every Day

2004-04-18T09:54:00.000-07:00

My current situation: I am unemployed. I am getting a masters degree. I am taking "side jobs" to help meet expenses. I am not writing as much as I would like. As soon as I can, I will get back on track here. Thanks for understanding.

TANSTAAFL!

Confessions of a Technocrat: Part 2

2004-04-09T12:30:00.000-07:00

(Ok, I admit that "technocrat" might just be a fancy way of saying "techno-geek").

We left off yesterday with a discussion of alignments. This was just to give the average reader, who hasn't ever experienced D&D an idea of how complex it gets. Much of the character's traits are numeric, they are randomly generated and fit into a complex set of mathematical formulas rolled by dice (ah yes, the "good old days," when I had a marble bag full of dice). Dice make really decent random number generators, so long as they don't roll off the table. Programming a computer to generate random numbers is really easy, (and a computer is drastically less likely to roll off the table). The other nice thing about modern computers is found in adding graphics and sound to the experience.

In the old PnP world, the player had to rely on a Dungeon Master (DM) to act as a guide and intermediary, essentially setting the rules, the tempo, and being an omniscient force that reveals and withholds according to the player's choices. The game centered around a "campaign" or module, which was either created professionally and purchased, or designed by the DM themselves. In the New World Order of things, software often assumes the role of DM, events and mysteries unfold as the player chooses direction, strategy, attacks, and actions. The original modules for the computer were completely written by game developers, who mostly got permission to base their creations on the old PnP modules themselves. Turn-based RPG games were churned out for every imaginable platform available. The computer could handle all the numbers. It could be programmed and scripted to show the action graphically, it removed some sense of imagination and replaced it with something else.

This is not to say that there aren't any dedicated PnP players out there, people still play D&D the "old fashioned way," but they've had to make room for computer-based versions that owe their existence (and popularity) to the original. I am certain there are "purists" out there who believe that these new RPG's aren't the same thing as PnP, and they are right to a certain extent. For computer-generated RPG's to reach an acceptable level of complex, plot-driven adventure that is possible in the PnP versions, it takes a great deal of skill, patience, and determination.

The unique and exciting thing about Neverwinter Nights is that the adventure does not end with the Original Campaign, nor does it end whether the player chooses to play it by themselves (solo), or online with friends (multiplayer). The truly amazing thing about this game is the Aurora Toolset, which allows anyone who has the full software to build their own custom mods. This greatly extends the appeal of the game, because the game never really ends. There are always more modules being created and shared online. All a player with the game need do is download them. One of the more active places to do so is The Neverwinter Vault, sponsored by IGN Games. A whole community of people around the world contributing games, files, pictures, and other ideas to further enhance and develop the gameplay. The development company, Bioware, has made a significant portion of how the game itself was developed known, so more advanced builders and developers have been able to add custom content to the modules. One of the more ambitious endeavors is called the Community Expansion Pack, or (CEP). This adds new monster types, new character types, and all sorts of new objects and items that were not originally included with the game.

Originally, builders were essentially "stuck" using the same objects, maps, monsters, and other items that were created by the original design team from Bioware. Many were able to use this original content with great skill and ease. People are never satisfied. Some of the more advanced builders started slowly creating their own custom content for their mods. Soon this became very popular with builders and players alike. It became possible to download much of this custom content in files called "hak packs." As the community outcry for custom content grew, it became difficult to keep all these files in order. It also meant to play one module, a player often had to download more than one file, let alone know which folder to put the files in so the mod would run correctly. It was a great big hassle. So you've got a lot of whiny nerdlings crying for more custom modules to play, and also whining that they've got to download and place all these additional files in different game folders. The idea to centralize the "best of the best" into a single download is a sound one.

As you can see this whole RPG scene is an incredibly complex one, and I've barely scratched the surface as far as the computer gaming world goes. I could go on forever with the details, but it is best to leave things simple. The idea is to give the reader a taste of "Technocratic culture," not make them feel inferior before a completely alien language and society that exists all around them. People feel disassociated enough these days. I consider much of the apathy in our society today to be a direct symptom of feeling that there is too much to keep up with, too much to do, and not enough time to do it all, so we start to try and simplify. We retreat back into ourselves until we no longer notice (or care) that there is anything or anyone around us of value. We lose touch, we lose a sense of connection, and we lose something of ourselves without even knowing it. This is why it is important to look under the surface of the mirror, deeper than just the reflection. The Technocratic Revolution has already been decided. The Technocrat society is already here. Many people have no idea they are members, still many more can't see it at all (and probably don't want to).

TANSTAAFL!

Confessions of a Technocrat: Part 1

2004-04-08T11:15:00.000-07:00

Please Note: It's spring break. I'm unemployed, and I am getting my masters degree. I may miss a day or two here and there.

I am most definitely a computer enthusiast. I suppose the first time I showed even a spark of interest in them happened when I was just 4 years old. This was way back in the "dinosaur years" of room-sized servers and dumb terminals. The PC wouldn't arrive for another 10 years at least. The Internet was still a DARPA sponsored experiment between four western universities. Things were indeed at a primitive state compared to today.

I was a veritable dynamo as a child. My mother's hair started turning gray about the time I was born. She would eventually develop very keen "mother senses," but they hadn't had time to fully develop at this point. To say I was a challenging child would be to say Mt. Everest is a "big hill." Keeping up with me was a full-time job in and of itself (Mom, you've got my nomination for sainthood). Let me put it to you this way: I may have been the first kid in America to be fitted with a dog harness and a leash.

So I'm four, and my mom brings me to work at her travel agency one day. Keeping me in a seat wasn't about to work. I don't know what she expected to do with me there. Before long, I found my way into the room with all the big humming machines. Somewhere in this room was the "red button," (and yet another reason why server rooms and network closets should always be locked). The "red button" seems to exist in a lot of places (why I don't know). It's the button that one is NEVER, under ANY CIRCUMSTANCES, to be pushed. Hah, I couldn't read at 4, and I was only so-so at following verbal directions at best. I bet you can figure out what happened next. Of course I pushed the "red button."

What you probably didn't know is that this had some sort of "cascade effect" over a computer network that affected travel agencies and airlines up and down the entire Eastern Seaboard. In 1974, computer networking was still in its infancy. Most of them had to be built with parts and components that weren't originally designed for that purpose. Nobody gave a moment's thought to network security, or what might happen if button "x" or "y" were pushed. Needless to say, following this incident, my invitation to be with mom at work was revoked for several years to come.

Since then, I have learned to do more useful things with computers and software. In college, I worked in a computer lab for several semesters. I have spent time as a helpdesk technician on the phone for an ISP, for Dell, and for various private industries. I've been a field technician for several companies too. In my last job, I learned how to be a software analyst and a programmer. I guess it would be fair to say I've come a long way in 30 years.

Besides using computers for more productive pursuits, I also enjoy using them for leisure. The realm of computer gaming is one that I am pretty familiar with. I've got an impressive library of computer games that I've beaten over the years. Some of them I've traded in for newer titles, others have become so old that they won't even work on my current PC.

I tend to gravitate towards the Action-Adventure, Strategy, First-Person Shooters, and Role Playing types of games. I never was big into physical sports, so I never really found it all that interesting to play them on a computer. Also, the only console I ever owned was an Atari 2600. Given the choice between a full-fledged PC that can do so much more than play games and a "box" that hooks up to a Television and might also be used to play DVD's, I'd rather have the PC every time. Why spend the extra money for something that only plays games when I can save it to add more to my computer? Admittedly, some pretty spectacular titles are made for consoles, but to me, that is a way of trying to control games. By taking away the computer aspect, players have less control over the games and are more subject to the whims of console manufacturers. But that's just my opinion.

Anyway, my latest obsession has been two Role-Playing Games (called "RPG's") by a company called Bioware. The first one is called Neverwinter Nights and the second Star Wars, Knights of the Old Republic. I will deal with these two in order.

Neverwinter Nights is based upon Dungeons and Dragons (known as D&D, or Paper and Pencil - PnP), yet another one of my childhood fascinations. The game is set up so you generate a character, equip them, and do battle with monsters, villains, and other assorted characters. You have a lot of choices concerning how your particular character goes about things. Your character (through you) has to solve a series challenging puzzles, interact with various "virtual" characters, and carefully maneuver through treacherous situations to survive. This is not a "blood and gore" (the term used in the community is: "hack and slash") game, this is a game where the player has to think on his (or her) feet, consider the consequences, and take action accordingly. Bioware to date, has created the Original Neverwinter Nights Campaign, (called NWN OC) and two expansion sets: Shadows of Unrentide, (called SoU) and Hoardes of the Underdark, (called HotU). Each of these campaigns is based upon D&D PnP modules written years before. They take place in a world setting called Forgotten Realms in a land called Faerun. If all of this seems overwhelming and confusing, don't worry. Basically, what we have is a place where people can be things they can't be "in real life" (IRL). It's a totally made-up world that regularly gets filled up with made up characters, adventures, and monsters of every imaginable type.

One plays this sort of game best by being that has various similarities to the player, but also has various differences too. Quite often, I play female elven characters (not going to get into a deep psychological analysis of this) that are generally good, but sometimes "blur the lines a little." To be quite honest, I've never played a "pure evil" character in my life. When talking about what sense of morality and ethics a player has, we are discussing something called "alignment," (sometimes "faction"). Alignments are really basic tendencies of a character. Given a situation, the character will act in accordance with a certain set of principles, or not. Whatever the case may be, there are three primary alignment traits and three secondary alignment traits. The primaries are: Lawful- generally adheres to law in any situation, Chaotic- generally does whatever they feel like regardless, and Neutral- decides on a case-by-case basis when it is appropriate to act and when it is not. The three secondary traits are: Good: cares about others, wants to help and protect those weaker and less fortunate, and despises suffering, treachery, and deceit, Evil: doesn't care about others, uses people to get what they want, and willing to do whatever it takes to further their own objectives and goals, and Neutral: generally seeks to find the balance between the two extremes, cares about others, but recognizes that some amount of suffering is necessary (not to mention inevitable), and that some people cannot (or will not) be helped. My characters tend to be Lawful Neutral, Neutral, or Neutral Good. Lawful Good and Chaotic Evil just tend to be too extreme for me. This is true of my real life tendencies as well (I don't think this makes me a bad person, just a pragmatic one).

To Be Continued.

TANSTAAFL!

Rites of Spring: Remembering Baseball

2004-04-06T09:39:00.000-07:00

Ah yes, springtime. Even in the desert, the smell of freshly cut grass makes one begin to think of ash wood bats, broken-in leather gloves, hotdogs, beer, and all the sights and sounds of baseball.

I remember it like it was yesterday. It was 1981, my father took me by train from Albany NY to the true Shrine of Baseball. No, not Cooperstown, that would happen a few years later. This day, we went to the heart of the Bronx, and I got my first glimpse of Yankee Stadium. Just thinking about that day still gives me goose bumps. Walking out into the open air just outside the canopy and seeing the site of so many great moments in baseball, for an 11-year old, I thought my life was now complete. Not only did I get to see "The House that Ruth Built," I also watched the Yankees pounce all over Kansas City.

For me, going to Yankee Stadium was like being in the presence of all the greatest players who ever wore the pinstripes. Few teams in the history of baseball have the enviable record of the "Bronx Bombers." That was the very first time I had ever been to a major league baseball game, and even after all these years, it is still indelibly etched into my psyche.

What is it about baseball? I wish I knew. In today's high-speed world, most people don't have the patience for "America's Past-time." People seem to crave more action; they gravitate towards more "physical" sports. Baseball still holds a spell over me. Maybe it is because my father and stepfather grew up during the "glory years" of baseball, when players were not paid outrageous sums of money, they played because they truly loved the game. Baseball games were a part of the American psyche during the 20th Century. They took up the better part of an afternoon, more if there was a double-header. A game took as long as it took, and people liked it that way. We stopped to enjoy the moment a little more then. Baseball players were the heroes of hard-working Americans; it remains "our sport."

From time-to-time, I catch specials on HBO on the history of baseball. There's the When it was a Game series, and then there are specials that focus in on one specific team. Just today I saw Curse of the Bambino, about the Boston Red Sox and over 70 years of heartbreak over a team that can't quite seem to get over the legacy of having traded Babe Ruth to the Yankees all those years ago. Yet the fans come out of hibernation every spring with a renewed sense of hope and vigor that: ".... Maybe, just maybe, this year will be the year. A part of me cheers for their loyalty. It is the same loyalty towards the underdog that helped form this nation, and certainly New England was an important part of our collective heritage. That spirit is alive and well in the hearts and minds of Boston fans.

As I grew up, my family moved from Upstate New York to Pittsburgh PA, now we lived in a true "sports town." It was a Pittsburgh tradition for boys to skip school to attend the Pirate's spring opener every year (this trend got so bad, that the Pirates organization started rescheduling their openers so they started in the evenings). "The boys" and me would go and watch "The Bucs" play, usually they lost, but we didn't care. We went because it was part of the rites of spring that must be observed. It was one of the few male-bonding rituals that I couldn't ignore, because it was in my blood.

I remember watching Bull Durham not long after I finished Navy boot camp. Movies on base were free for sailors, and I was desperately low on funds because I was contributing to my G.I. Bill, and only an E-2 at the time. I went to this movie with little in the way of expectations. It would not have been a movie I would have chosen to go to, but it was what was playing and beggars can't be choosers. What happy coincidence that this move was playing; I fell in love with the movie, and it renewed my love for the game.

The more I watched, the more I realized how important baseball was to people. It is more than just a game; it is a passion, a thrill, something that links us to our past with an undeniable sense of hope and renewal. It is a modern rite of spring. Just as the plants and animals come to life once more, we too come to life. Every year, the slate is wiped clean: "our team" has another chance. They might go all the way. Baseball isn't played with bone-crushing brute force. It isn't played with finesse and style. Baseball takes its own time. It cannot be rushed or hurried. It demands that anyone who watches slow down and make a deliberate choice to be entertained at its own speed.

More people seem to be unable to make the sacrifice baseball demands of them. They have too many pressures to be several places at once. Their cell phones, pagers, and PDA's are filled with appointments, To-Do's, important calls and meetings, all the trappings of a society that has given too much in the name of urgency and self-importance. We have forgotten the magic of a Sunday afternoon spent cheering on our favorite teams. Now we can check our favorite team via the Internet in between other endeavors. It isn't that we don't have the time; we no longer make the time. Time makes us. That is the tragedy of baseball. It reminds us of the simpler things in life, but we no longer wish to be reminded. We have trouble savoring the moments because we are already looking forward, planning, thinking; waiting impatiently for it to arrive. Like so many things in life, Baseball is about the journey, not the destination. If we forget how to enjoy baseball, we have forgotten how to enjoy what it means to be Americans. That would be tragedy beyond words.

When it was a Game Triple Play

TANSTAAFL!

The Infinite Many - The Web as a Digital "Collective Unconscious"

2004-04-03T17:46:00.000-08:00

We all consider ourselves individuals, yet there are somehow aspects to ourselves to which we cannot attribute to our development, our environment, or our general personality. There are things about every one of us that just seem to be "there." We do not often acknowledge it, but every one of us has a "dark side," to our personality. We can act in a way that is inconsistent with "civilized behavior," if circumstances should unfold in a certain way. We begin to "carve ourselves up" into pieces, parts, aspects, and categories, and often we forget that the disassembly means nothing if we do not put it back together and view the whole.

One of the more interesting ideas of the 20th Century was postulated by Carl Jung, a psychologist and one-time student of the pioneer of Modern Psychology, Sigmund Freud. Jung championed the idea of something called the collective unconscious. Theoretically, this is an aspect to our personality that we are unaware of and cannot be acquired via experience or environment. They are the thoughts and feelings which exist "beneath the surface" of our psyche, and even our unconscious mind is not aware of them. Jung believed the Collective Unconscious was genetic in nature, primarily inherited through our ancestors. Jung's observations went much further. He saw the common "threads" of mythology and literature across cultures with vastly different languages and mores. These common threads were too similar to be mere coincidence, so Jung theorized that some portion of these commonalities is a birthright, no different than skin pigment, hair color, or eye color.

The crossroads of the collective unconscious and common mythologies brings us to another interesting individual by the name of Joseph Campbell, a literary scholar whose lifework was to collect and weave these common threads into a most amazing book called The Hero with a Thousand Faces, which discusses the commonalities between various mythos across many cultures, eventually demonstrating that they are all an archetype of a single hero, whose story reinvented itself, over and over, as the varied tribes of humanity dispersed to cover the world.

So we have a psychologist and a literary scholar, a man of the mind and a man of letters, whose theories seem to fit together in an ecclectic jigsaw, saying that some portion of us that we are consciously unaware, was a gift from our forbears, and ties us all together in a tapestry as old as time itself. Yet this seems to be only a starting point, a crysalis cacoon phase of our development, for we have found a way to reinvent our collective unconscious yet again. As a caterpillar slumbers and dreams of becoming a butterfly, so we have changed. Through the use of a vast network of interconnected, interwoven computers, we have created a "physical" representation of all there is about us. When we look into it, we see our reflection as if it were a sort of "digital mirror," and it contains the sum total of our ideas, our feelings, our fears, our triumphs, our tragedies, our heros, our villians, and all points in-between. Of course I speak of the very World Wide Web upon which this very post resides.

Where else can we find such a rich representation of all that is best and worst about us than on the web? The web is virtualy infinite in its dimension. It appears far larger on the inside than it appears on the outside. Nobody knows its true boundaries for certain. We have fed it all that we are and all that we might be to the point that none of us can claim to know it all. Most of us never become aware of even the smallest percentage of it. Yet it holds a clear representation of a collective unconscious. Its formlessness extends beyond the horizon, and yet each of us may touch it, leave some small mark upon it that our descendents may somehow come to know what we were by what we left them.

Collective Uncionscious

Campbell's Myths

World Wide Brain

TANSTAAFL!

Cars that Drive Themselves-DARPA's Grand Challenge

2004-04-02T17:41:00.000-08:00

The Defense Advanced Research Project Agency, or DARPA (they originally funded the project that created the Internet), recently sponsored a grand challenge in which design teams from around the nation were invited to build autonomous land vehicles (cars and trucks with no human drivers) and race them in the desert between California and Nevada. The prize was one million dollars. I watched TechTV's coverage of the race and I was impressed, however, none of the entries made it further than 8 miles from the starting point. Considering all the challenges involved, I am not terribly surprised at this outcome. One hopes that they gained valuable data to help advance the concept of an autonomous land vehicle along.

Try to imagine creating an autonomous computer program (and the machinery) that can do all the things we would normally do behind the wheel of a car or truck. The permutations are endless. How will it know where it is (it's not like it can stop and ask for directions)? How will the vehicle react to people or animals in its path? What happens if the navigation system is unable to pinpoint its location? What will it do if it cannot negotiate the terrain? What will it do if it encounters an obstacle? Is it allowed to "call for help" from a human (or another machine) if it can't resolve a situation? Will it know to stop or avoid hitting humans or animals?

It seems to me that the vehicles in this race were totally reliant on GPS and had no backup system for self-correction. The designers were so focused on maintaining the GPS coordinate sets that they didn't consider providing the automated "drivers" with collision avoidance or adjustment mechanisms. It's as if the folks based their designs on the idea that the vehicles would be operating on a large empty parking lot: Perfectly flat and void of any obstacles or potential interference with their navigation systems. It's definitly a starting point, but it is obvious that there are a lot more factors to be added in as this idea evolves.

Navigation is not just about where you are on a map, but being able to correct for the unknown obstacles in the terrain as well. I want to know if it would be possible to create a sensory package using a combination of methods the way humans have five senses, so that the vehicle could "sense" obstacles and make local corrections to compensate for them, and then do an update fix on it's GPS location. My idea for a sensory package would be some form of sonar, radar, infra-red, and perhaps some sort of imaging. I guess we're looking at some way of allowing the AI to use more than just GPS as a source of navigation. Imagine if it could use star charts at night to aid in navigation, or be programmed to store key image elements of the terrain to know where it has already been.

The other thing I would want to design is some method of having the vehicle stop if it is unable to use it's sensory input or GPS fix, and run some self-diagnostics. If it cannot resolve it's own problem, it should be able to send a signal to indicate a malfunction, or request human assistance.

Some ideas I have thought of have to do with the way wireless networking works. The newest wireless standard is called 802.11g. What happens is, if you have a wireless card in your laptop that uses the "g" standard, and someone nearby (whom you've authorized) loses their direct wireless connection, they can request to "borrow" yours until their own connection becomes stable again. You'll never notice the difference. My idea would be that these autonomous ground vehicles are deployed along with aerial drones such as the Preadators, manned airplanes of various types, manned ground units, even footsoldiers, who all have some sort of electronic GPS system that the autonomous vehicle can contact to help it get a better fix on its location. I even thought that the autonomous vehicle itself could have a payload of small sensors it can "drop" that it can use as a "fix marker" of some sort. Like a tracking bug, it would be able to determine the distance from the marker and use that to better pinpoint its current location.

Probably my ideas are nothing new or original. This Grand Challenge seemed to be more about trying out vehicle configurations and basic AI to handle the simple GPS navigation issues. Perhaps as a result of this experience, more thought will be given to obstacle avoidance and redundant navigational backups, and remote sensory packages. Whatever the reasoning, it is an interesting problem to consider. Just the thing to bring out the geek in me.

DARPA Grand Challenge website

TANSTAAFL!

When Your PC has that "Not So Fresh Feeling"

2004-04-02T00:05:00.000-08:00

To an extent, I have been an IT professional for more than 10 years. I remember the frustrations of dialing up with less-than a 28.8 modem, let alone a 33.6 or 56k. Yet besides those unfortunate souls who cannot find cable or DSL where they live, I cannot fathom why anyone would still be using dialup to connect to the net.

I have had cable now since 1997. My wife is a notorious penny-pincher (she can squeeze 'em until they scream) and even she sees the value in being able to "click-and-go." No waiting for the modems to dial up (2 of our 4 PC's don't even have a telephone modem), just BOOM; site is up faster than it takes for you to read this.

I've got solid defenses. I'm certain if someone wanted to spend the time, they could eventually crack them, but most of the time, it is far easier to look for that person who doesn't know any better. I have a four-port cable/DSL router on my system. It allows me to split my line to all four of our computers (two desktops and two laptops), and yes, all four of them can be online at the same time without any noticeable speed problems, and it doesn't cost me anything extra per month.

There is only one group of people who leave me with less enthusiasm then dial-up folk. AOL users. No self-respecting IT person I've ever known would let AOL NEAR his or her PC. It is the same old story over and over again. Every time they release a new version, people race to update to it, and then the problems begin. AOL "takes over" the system and makes changes to it, it conflicts with certain types of hardware, it doesn't like some feature of this program or that, or the virus protection thinks its a virus...yadda yadda yadda. I could make a living off of solving AOL version update issues. Half the time, AOL users call up their own tech support and they don't even know what the problems are or how to fix them!

The first thing to do if you really want to stop having problems with AOL- uninstall it and call your local cable or phone provider and get broadband. All those "pretty tools" AOL includes bloat the operating system beyond belief and drag down system performance until it's at a standstill. Windows is bad enough to put up with when it's working correctly. Adding AOL to Windows is like simultaneously pouring gasoline and gunpowder onto a raging forest fire.

Most people don't realize what it is that causes their systems to become slow, unstable, and unreliable. They run Windows for years, installing programs, downloading files, reinstalling programs, never once considering how much wear and tear this actually puts on the Windows Registry. Sooner or later, even if the user runs regular maintenance, Windows will become so unstable that it will crash more than it runs. Then it's time to totally reformat the hard drive and reinstall Windows from scratch. I generally do this 2 to 3 times a year, just to clean off the "clutter." You'd be amazed at how much faster my system runs just after I've done a clean reformat-reinstall. Just like anything else, a computer can accumulate waxy build-up. Sooner or later, it'll be time to clean house.

When it comes to E-mail, a surprising number of people have used Outlook Express or Outlook, simply because either one or the other (or both) came bundled with their PC's. I would venture to say that 75-85% of all computer viruses written today are transmitted via Outlook Express or Outlook, simply because so many people use it. This is exactly why I don't. I always had a thing for Netscape, but even I had to run away from it screaming when 6.0 came out. That's why I was so happy to find Mozilla. Mozilla is a free browser based upon the old Netscape Communicator 4.5 I used to love. Communicator had a browser, e-mail program, and Web page composer, address book, all in one. It was the greatest thing since sliced bread and the unbreakable plastic comb.

With everyone optimizing websites for Internet Explorer, it became too problematic to use Netscape for browsing, but I continued to use it's E-mail program until I found Mozilla. Mozilla is part of the Open Source movement. Anyone who wants to can learn how it works and create tools and plug-ins that enhance what it can do. There are all sorts of neat add-ins and plug-ins for Mozilla. It pretty much had all the things that made Netscape Communicator 4.5 such a great and powerful tool. But of course, this is not where my story ends.

The Mozilla team has been hard at work on a new browser and E-mail program. They call their new browser Firefox and their E-mail program is Thunderbird. I recently downloaded and installed these programs and I can honestly say that they are 10 times better than anything Microsoft could ever hope to produce. They are very easy to use and set up. I was up and running with them in minutes. I followed instructions on their site to create a simple file that allowed me to link my old bookmarks right into Firefox. Thunderbird is a full feature E-mail program that kicks the crap out of Spam, and provides all sorts of great tools for working with messages. The best part about it is I am NOT using Outlook Express or Outlook, which makes me less vulnerable to viruses written specifically to exploit Microsoft products.

Recently, I was given an old IBM Aptiva that needs a new hard drive. I plan to purchase a bigger one for my current PC and put one of my old ones into the Aptiva. I'm going to try running the Linux operating system on it.

Linux has many advantages over Windows; first and foremost, it's completely FREE (yes, it doesn't cost you anything but time). The other neat thing about Linux is that it is part of the Open Source project, meaning the source code for Linux is available for anyone who wants to figure it out and write programs for it (try that with Windows). This has produced an operating system that is surprisingly robust and free of bugs.

A vast majority of the people who use Linux also make improvements to it and share them regularly, there is no waiting for the mega conglomerate to release it's next service pack to fix why something won't work, as is the case with Windows. Linux is also popular because not too many people write viruses that affect it, in fact, I've yet to hear of a single virus. Linux used to be clunky looking, but today, it looks very much like the Windows environment. Many people would barely notice the difference, except maybe for no "blue screens of death." Of course Linux is based upon one of the most stable operating systems ever created by man: UNIX.

So what have we learned today? Dialup sucks, Broadband Rocks, AOL isn't worth the hassle, Outlook Express and Outlook are easy targets for viruses, Mozilla, Firefox, and Thunderbird are much better products, and Linux is quickly looking like a better choice over Windows.

The Angst of Dialup

The Broadband Revolution

AOL Watch

How Computer Viruses Work

Vulnerability in Microsoft Outlook Could Allow Code Execution (828040)

Outlook and Outlook Express

Mozilla Firefox Browser

Mozilla Thunderbird Project

The Many Flavors of UNIX

If You Don't Do Windows (Try Linux)

The Open Source Initiative

TANSTAAFL!

Precious Cargo: Babies Left Out in the Heat

2004-03-31T10:26:00.000-08:00

I was watching the local news today and heard a shocking statistic. In the past 5 years, 160 young children have died because their parents left them in the car during the summer season. This may seem like a drop in the bucket, but to me it's 160 too many. I am not a parent, but it doesn't take a parent to feel absolutely devastated for the families this has happened to.

Experts say that this phenomenon generally occurs to with new parents whose driving routines have recently changed. They have so much on their minds that they forget they've strapped their baby into the child seat. It seems inconceivable, but I can think of many other things I've forgotten to do, or misplaced, due to changes in my routine. A child seems a bit more important, however. Trying to put myself in the shoes of a parent who left their child in a car is hard for me to do.

Imagine that this happened: that you were the one who left your sleeping child in the car. If it's 93 degrees Fahrenheit outside, the inside of a car will heat up to 120 degrees in just 20 minutes. Heat stroke is when the body loses its ability to regulate its own temperature. This only requires the body temperature to be rapidly increased from 98.6 to 106 degrees for as little as 15 minutes, and, if not remedied immediately, can cause irreparable brain damage, or death.

Maybe we need to put parents in a similar situation for just a few minutes. We strap them into a seat and increase the temperature in the room just enough to make things uncomfortable for a few minutes, as a reminder that they have to stop and think that they've got someone whose completely helpless and relies on them for survival. The Navy taught me what could happen if I put my gas mask on incorrectly by making me take it off in a room full of tear gas. I think I'd rather experience a few minutes of tear gas, than a very short lifetime of nerve gas. Another not so drastic measure is to place a stuffed animal in the car seat and leave it there. Why? Because when you have to strap your child into the seat, you'll have to move the stuffed animal. Put it in the front seat as a reminder that there is someone sitting back there. This might work.

Here in Las Vegas, a seven-month old baby was left in a hot car last summer. The father is a highly respected teacher and coach at a local high school. This year, they are commemorating the loss by holding a special month filled with reminders and helpful information for parents. The students are passing out blue and pink ribbons to be tied onto car antennas to remind parents that they've got "precious cargo" with them.

Some Sites concerning this Issue:

Babies Left in Cars

Gentle Parents

Brian Carnell- Baby Killing Season Starts Early

TANSTAAFL!

What Lies Beneath the Web?

2004-03-30T20:54:00.000-08:00

Last year, I was given the opportunity to do a heck of a lot of research using the Web. As a result of this research, I developed a keen sense of where to find things and which search engines were appropriate for which types of searches. Contrary to popular belief, Google is not always the best choice, (although it must be said that few search engines spend so much of their time reinventing their own wheel as Google does).

Like anything else, the Web has layers. The deeper into those layers one delves, the more fascinating it becomes. It is something similar to the geologists who can look at the layers in rock and tell you how old they are. The web constantly reinvents itself at the "top layer," compressing and pushing the layers underneath downward.

One of the pivotal moments in the development of the web was the addition of meta tags, or keywords to web pages. This made it really easy for search engines to compile and reference lists of web pages by similar subjects. Of course it wouldn't take long for the Spam and porn industry to catch on, and start coming up with all sorts of ways to scam the search engines into giving their sites more "hits."
Meta tags brought websites "to the surface," but in so doing, it pushed others down.

Traditionally, search engines relied either on calling up meta tags, or on a predetermined list of websites chosen by humans. Soon the search engines would evolve to include both these techniques, and beyond. These new search engines were called Meta-search engines; such as Metacrawler, one of the first I ever used.

The nature of the web began to change. Sites which had commercial content and were more constantly updated stayed closer the surface, while sites which were not so well maintained began to fall away. Many of the sites that were pushed down were maintained by more transient populations, such as universities, government agencies, and other non-commercial entities. Many of these sites contained massive amounts of useful information, but they were no longer able to be easily called up by doing a more "modern" browser search. Imagine being a non-swimmer in a pool for the first time. More than likely, you'll stay to the shallow end. Maybe you'll never feel the need to head to deeper waters, but there it is, just the same.

The deep web consists of a wealth of sites that have sunk below the more "popular" layer of the web. Alot of these sites contain huge amounts of database information that are extremely relevant in research applications. Instead of simply leaving these poor sites to their demise, new techniques were developed to bring them back to the surface.

This led to the advent of a new kind of search engine: the trawler. Traditionally, trawlers are boats, primarily used in commercial fishing. The boats drag large nets behind them, scooping up schools of fish, shrimp, whatever. In the days before deep water diving, a trawler could be outfitted with a series of hooks on a chain to literally "drag" bodies and objects off the bottom in any deep water. The Web Trawler is software that uses a number of different methods to search for web sites. A very good explaination is available at http://turbo10.com/trawler.html Turbo 10.

I discovered that the web was really a series of webs, one built right on top of the other, the way some civilizations built their cities upon the ruins of previous civilizations. It was like discovering the World Wide Web for the first time all over again. I had started looking more closely into Internet-based research for my wife, who is pursuing her doctorate, and for my supervisor, who needed to compile some statistical data in a hurry. I ended up writing a very long guide to internet research on an extremely broad range of topics. I began to distribute it to friends, collegues, and fellow students. I found it very useful to group these sites loosely by their main objectives, and I gave them a rating based upon functionality, commercialism, and ease of use. One of these days, I might even get around to publishing it on the web for everyone to use.

Some more places to learn about the Deep Web:

Virtual Private Library Deep Web Research Site

SUNY- Albany Library Site on the Deep Web

Salon Article on The Deep Web

About.Com site on the Deep Web

An excellent white paper on the Deep Web

Same white paper as above in Adobe Acrobat .pdf format

TANSTAAFL!

Form Following Form

2004-03-30T16:20:00.000-08:00

I apparently made an impression upon my former company. I wrote an E-mail to their corporate website and I recieved a response today. One of the Executive Vice Presidents got on the phone with me and we had a little chat. I kept it pleasant and sociable. I told her I applied for unemployment compensation, and she seemed to indicate that the company would not contest it (we'll see).

She asked me what they could do to improve the process, and I certainly gave them a few strong suggestions about supporting their consultants and establishing up front with the client that they need continual feedback from them. She gave me a lot of those "repeat back" questions: "So, if I understand you correctly, you're saying..." I hope she lets the field office in on some of my suggestions. I felt very betrayed by the whole situation.

She said she could tell from what I told her that I cared a great deal more about my work than about being released from my contract. She indicated that this was a positive factor. I told her that if nothing else, I took away a great deal of skill and knowledge I did not previously have, as the court did not give me a whole lot to do. I think of all the taxpayer money they've wasted already, and how much more they'll have to waste trying to get someone else to fill my shoes. Government agencies just love to spend other people's money.

I still may put in a claim to the EOC. I feel there is discrimination involved. I was treated like a used piece of garbage to be thrown out on a whim. I feel that there was intentional retaliation involved here. We'll see.

TANSTAAFL!

Violated: Push-Me-Pull-You Contract Consulting

2004-03-29T13:48:00.000-08:00

This past Friday, my contract-holder took me out to lunch to "celebrate" my 1-year anniversary with my current client. What I did not know was that they were also there to give me the news that the client no longer wanted my services. I was given no reason. I was asked to turn over my badge. When I asked about my personal affects, I was told that someone else would collect them. This did not set well with me. I indicated that I had a lot of items and they would be heavy. Again I was told that this was not my concern. Unfortunately, it was very much my concern.

After my half-eaten lunch, I decided to go back to the office and pack my own things. I had forgotten to give over my keys, and I was concerned about anyone else having to go through all my stuff and figure out what was mine and what was the clients. I also thought I would jot down an E-mail thanking everyone I could think of and saying goodbye. As I sent the E-mail, a system message came up saying my account was no longer authorized. They had already taken me out of the loop. Had I not sent that message, I would have just been another person who was there one Friday and gone the next Monday with no explanations.

As it turned out, the client was furious that I violated her orders. She called up the agency that held my contract and gave them hell for it. As a result, when I went to get my personal items the following Monday, I was told me I could no longer represent them as a consultant. The price I paid for valuing my personal effects. Nobody seemed to consider the idea of asking for a security guard to escort me to my desk so I could pack my own things. Like I want someone going through my belongings, let alone the fact that I had four boxes worth of items that were scattered amongst two desks. I do not feel it unreasonable to ask that I be allowed to pack my own things. If the client is too much of a coward to look me in the eyes when letting me go, then at least they should have the basic manners to throw me a bone here.

I put over a year in at this place. I gave it my heart and soul. Unfortunately, a "new regime" came in to power, and my supervisor requested a transfer out, leaving me exposed for all to see. Apparently, I had a lot of bad habits, like an over abundance of enthusiasm for helping my fellow workers, and a desire to do everything I could for the people "in the trenches," dealing with the public every day. I guess my desire to remain productive while at work was perceived as "too aggressive," for the mediocre bureaucrats who sat on their fat asses waiting for the day they could collect their fat government pensions.

On several occasions I told the "professionals" who held my contract that the work environment was difficult and ambiguous. They considered what I had to say as merely rants and raves, because of course I wanted the steady paycheck worse than I actually wanted them to pull me out of there.

I am no politician, nor do I wish to play "company politics," even when my employer happens to be a government agency. Might I be expressing some "sour grapes," here? Probably. I am frustrated that I put so much time and energy into a place and project where my efforts went unnoticed. I am frustrated that I got no guidance except when I crossed someone's "invisible line." I'm frustrated that others could send accusatory, degrading, and highly critical E-mails concerning my work to every member of the administrative team, and yet I was chastised for the times I defended myself. I am very angry that from day one, I was given no idea what my duties were, what was expected of me, nor how I should conduct myself. I was merely told to "stay busy," thus I became "self-promoting," finding ways to help people and make a difference. Officially over the course of a year and two weeks, I was directly given three assignments. The rest of my activities were left completely up to me.

Of course perhaps this is not the ideal environment for someone like me. I am a creative person. I thrive on challenges and live to solve problems using whatever I can scrounge. I do not like to sit and wait for someone to tell me what to do. I want to do whatever I can, while I can, for as long as I can. When the new department head took over, all of this began to change. Suddenly, my wings were clipped. I wasn't to go anywhere, E-mail anyone, or call anyone without getting the direct permission from my supervisor, who was always kept so busy; she had no time to spend talking with the likes of me. I was essentially "chained to my desk," but I couldn't conduct my projects from my desk. I have to have contact with the people I worked with. It just wouldn't work that way. Then my supervisor requested a transfer out, and I fell directly under the new department head.

The new department head seemed eager to "micromanage" everyone. I believe she perceived me as a "loose cannon," and the fact that I was in another office three blocks from her desk only served to increase her irritations in my direction. As a sub-contracted temp hired as a "Vendor," I could be employed indefinitely, but it appeared my time was over. Now I am unemployed, technically "fired," so no unemployment. I can't help but feel I fell victim to a Hostile Work Environment due to the factors that I was never given any guidance, never given any duties, subject to constant accusations and abuse by one manager, whose very presence only confirms the "Peter Principle," that administrators are usually promoted way past their level of competence.

I do believe the contract agency let me down more than once. They failed to create or maintain a relationship with the client. They failed to defend me when I needed it. They failed to really listen when I asked them for help. They failed to consider just how wrong it was not to find a way to allow me pack my own personal belongings. To add insult to injury, they abandoned me because they refused to defend my right to my possessions, and I insisted upon packing them myself, something I should have had every right to do regardless of the situation. If there was some sort of security policy issue, then send someone from security to remain present until I was finished.

I have tried several times to get in touch with my former department head to no avail. I did talk to the top Administrator of the client in question; all she did was wish me well in the future. I am terribly depressed and frustrated by what has transpired here. Even if some of it is my fault, I was unfairly treated by both sides.

The Consulting Company

The Client

TANSTAAFL!

Let's Invest in "Insourcing"

2004-03-26T06:36:00.000-08:00

Being an IT professional, I am quite alarmed at the growing trend in Outsourcing. The President is obviously being paid to do nothing on the issue, if for no other reason; this is sufficient in my opinion to show him the door.

I propose that the government, through the use of taxation, make outsourcing hurt American companies until they see the light. For every 10% of their workforce that is outsourced, they will be assessed a 10% tax liability against their net profits. The money will go directly to job retraining programs, a relocation fund, and unemployment benefits. The government is essentially saying: “You’re outsourcing? Great! You’re going to help pay for the Americans you’ll displace.”

Of course if we’re going to sock them for outsourcing, we should be encouraging them to insource. For every 10% of their workforce that they shift back to the U.S. in that tax year, we’ll give them a 5% accross-the-board tax credit.

If a company or corporation moves its operations out of the United States, they’re going to be assessed a 25% tax liability on that year’s net profits. Once again, the monies collected will be earmarked specifically for job retraining, relocation expenses, and unemployment for displaced American workers. For every company or corporation that moves or returns its operations to the United States, we’ll offer a 25% tax credit for the current year. For maintaining 50% or more of their operations in the United States, they will receive a 5% credit for every 10% over the minimum, (at 50% they get 5%, at 60%, they’ll get 10% and so on).

In the long run, keeping professional jobs and major corporations in America is better for America, This promotes growth, and represents a long-term investment by our government in the people, which our government is supposed to serve.

TANSTAAFL!

Welcome to the Desert of the Real

2004-03-25T06:32:00.000-08:00

Being a “computer geek” with a liberal arts background, it should come as no surprise that I am a huge fan of the popular Matrix trilogy. The fact that the whole series of movies is one big metaphoric “mirror” of our own society is something that probably escaped the masses, which delighted in the flash, violence, and special effects, (which, are by no means anything to sneeze at).

When Morpheus tells Neo that the Matrix is about control, he wasn’t lying. Nor was it a coincidence that just about every major myth, legend, and spiritual belief in existence was somehow represented within the confines of the three movies. Perhaps we aren’t “human batteries,” as it was portrayed in the films, but we are certainly moving through a world based upon rules and controls.

Consider how we get our information. How do we know whether it is “true” or not? Most of us accept what we are told because we don’t have the time or inclination to root things out for ourselves. I cannot think of one source of information that is not “filtered” through several other levels before it reaches me. Even the Internet, that bastion of freedom and rebellion, is not entirely free of the potential corruption. Many of us are so “...hopelessly dependent on the system,” that there is no way to “unplug” us from it.

How about our dependence on “the basics” of survival: food, shelter, electricity, running water, a reasonably maintained system of sanitation, vehicles, fuel...what if these systems and sub-systems suddenly “broke down”? What would happen if so many of our layers upon layers of support were suddenly ripped away? How many people would be able to fend for themselves? How many people would starve to death, or succumb to diseases that our civilization had previously wiped out? If the “structure” we so greatly depend upon were to come crashing in upon itself, I suspect we would see a lot of primal instincts and urges from our past resurfacing. The evolutionary concept of Laze Faire, or “survival of the fittest,” would surely come into action.

The message is clear: we have become lazy. We have allowed the control over our thoughts, our feelings, and our very survival to become so hopelessly over dependent that many of us would not know what to do without these structures. We have become voluntary victims of the success of our forebears to the point that their success, has led to our excess. We have way too much and no clue what to do with it all. This in and of itself creates a level of control- we are the ultimate consumers. We consume far more than we can produce, and we take far more than we need, without replenishing what we take.

The Matrix explores just about every method of control there is. When one is broadcasting into the matrix, one is pretty much “strapped down” into a chair. If one’s “projected self” dies within the matrix, the body in the “real world” also dies. All our understandings and beliefs control how we think, feel, and operate within the world. Try, even for a moment, to consider the possibility that everything you’ve ever been told, come to understand, or taken for granted to be “true,” is a misrepresentation or an outright lie. Imagine that the very fabric that allows you to function as you do each day is torn asunder. Could your sanity survive? Would you be able to salvage what was left and continue to function?

I submit that most of us have come to understand our world through our own personal interactions with it. If we were to discover that our interactions were flawed or somehow “separated” from “true reality,” we would no longer have the frame of reference necessary to function. We would have to start all over again, rebuilding our concepts and beliefs until we could come to terms with our environment. We humans tend to be contextual beings. We quite often create contexts by which we are able to assimilate and accommodate everything around us. Without these “artificial constructs,” many of us would be unable to do so.

Our sense of “artificiality” has led to the advent of so-called “reality TV,” where we passively partake in the struggles, trials, and tribulations of others. It is sort of a “rehash” of the highly successful formula used in soap operas: most people become mesmerized by OPP (Other People’s Problems) because in so doing, they can, even for a moment, escape their own. When we no longer have to fight and struggle to stay alive, we must find other ways to channel these instincts, naturally, we have turned to sex, drugs, violence, thrill seeking, and all manner of distractions. It seems we need something to immerse ourselves in that allows us, even for a moment, to forget that we are more-or-less “stuck” in our own lives. If we want to keep what we have, and add to it, we have to be willing to give up much of our freedoms to do so. Just like in the movie, it is a choice we’ve made, but I’m not so sure we’re really interested in understanding that choice. Perhaps this is why we spend so much time distracting ourselves.

Even time is an artificial construct. We never seem to have enough of it. When we are busy, it seems to “fly.” When we are not, it seems to drag on indefinitely. The numbers don’t change, just our perceptions of the count. So many people make themselves frantic trying to “stay on time.” We try to squeeze more and more into the same amount of time, and somehow justify that someday if we keep working hard, we’ll actually get a chance to relax. Usually, by the time “someday” comes, we no longer have the health or vigor left to enjoy whatever is left of our lives.

Time is an illusion. It controls us because we make choices based upon our faulty perceptions of it. It drives a sense of urgency that is also illusionary, but many of us feel we cannot ignore that either. The more “urgent” our time becomes, the more desperate we begin to feel, the less likely we are to consider others around us, and the more likely we are to justify rude behavior in our expedience. The more we allow time to control us, the more selfish and less compassionate we become.

One of the more important elements to The Matrix is the concept of choice. According to Agent Smith, the first matrix was a disaster, people refused to accept the programming because it was far too Utopian in nature. Without a sense of purpose and a sense of struggle, humans don’t know what to do. We cannot live in a state of constant pleasure without the corresponding (and interwoven) possibility of suffering. Yet there are many who, even today, believe we can deny those things that we perceive to be “unpleasant,” by clinging to that which we perceive to be “pleasant.” All things are one, they must be accepted as they are, not as we would wish, hope, or pray, for them to be.

This brings us to faith. Such a small word, and like love, it means many different things depending on whom you ask. For some, it is about surrender, for others, it is about unquestioned belief, still others see it as something they can turn to for solace, guidance, and ultimate understanding. Faith may be all of these things and more, but at the core of faith there is one very important principle: letting go. When we have true faith, we let go of our worries, our concerns, and our troubles. Faith trusts that, whatever happens, that is what was meant to happen, whether we believe it to be by “divine intelligence,” or sheer coincidence. It doesn’t matter which. At some point, we all have to let go of the things we cannot control, and trust that events will unfold accordingly. We must recognize that, having done the best we can, whatever happens, happens. Somehow, I doubt that everyone would agree with my interpretation of this issue.

People have turned faith into a type of control. They have turned it into a sort of clingy, needy, and desperate, longing for events to unfold a certain way. Many people build their entire lives around the idea that having faith means they must not only cling to their beliefs with steadfast vigilance, but that they must also convince others that they too should believe the same way. Such people have confused ego with faith, and cannot abide the idea that anyone would believe differently than they do. A familiar pattern emerges, yet another form of control, (which begs the question: whom is the controller, and who is being controlled?).

This brings an interesting paradox to the whole equation: “If faith is about letting go and most of what we encounter in our lives is a control of one form or another, isn’t faith simply accepting those controls thus making us willing participants in our own enslavement?” Recognizing that our current state of affairs is pretty much designed to control us is only part of the issue. Recognizing that our best way of gaining back control of our lives is to let it all go, that is the tough part.

Most of us have been convinced we do have control over our lives. We have been “programmed” to assume that, because we are making decisions and choices every day, that we are ultimately in control of our own destiny. Once we realize that the current system does not really permit that level of autonomy over ourselves; only then can we accept the choice to let it all go. Our feeble attempts at controlling our lives within the current framework usually end up going awry anyway. In order to regain the freedom to control our own lives, we must first recognize that we cannot control the situation we now find ourselves in. Then we can let go. Once we let go, we realize we were being fooled into giving away what was never really ours to give.

We have, each of us, made a choice. We have chosen to accept what we understand, perceive, and feel right now to be reality. We have chosen to rely on this vision of reality to the point that it has become the keystone in our collective “arches.” Yet, in order for us to evolve, to grow, to learn, to become something greater than we are right now, we have to be willing to push outward from the “safe boundaries.” We must be willing to travel into the unknown and discover what it is it has to teach us. This is how we break out of the controls, rules, locks, and bars we have established around our lives. This is how we shake loose the sediment and dust of our current circumstance and open ourselves up to new possibilities. Fear may be a part of this process, but it does not have to dominate or control us. We can choose our own path, but first, we must recognize the path we are now on, and decide to choose another.

TANSTAAFL!

Something Versus Nothing

2004-03-24T06:31:00.000-08:00

I owe some money to a lender. I also incurred some serious debt when I was unemployed. I made arrangements with this lender to start making regular payments last week. After carefully looking at my expenses, I was able to shake loose $100.00 per month to pay them.

They called back today asking if I had made arrangements to pay them. I explained how much I could afford and don't you know the person was not happy with my arrangements?

"This is not Let's Make a Deal." she said.

"No I realize that, but this is all I can afford right now." I said.

"Its not enough to get you out of delinquency." She said.

"Would you prefer I sent you nothing then?" I asked.

"That's your choice, but this is unacceptable. This is not Let's Make a Deal." Again she reminds me.

"That's fine. Thank you. I'll spend the money elsewhere then." I replied, and hung up.

I can't believe these people! Considering the statistics surrounding how rare it is for them to deal with a debtor who wants to pay them back, they seem to be so ungrateful, it's disheartening!

I am well aware that I am responsible for incurring a debt that must be paid. I am doing everything in my power to pay that debt, but that's not good enough for them. I show a little good faith and they can't even thank me for at least trying to honor my agreement?

I'm going to leave the arrangements in place and see if they're not going to accept them. How much you want to bet they'll take it and shut up (I'm betting $100.00 a month on it)?

Selfish greedy bastards is what they are.

TANSTAAFL!

2004-03-22T07:25:00.000-08:00

Lost in Translation

Some days I feel like everything just gets lost in the translation.

I had trouble locking down the location of my blog. I swear I stuck a copy of this location in my favorites, but come Monday morning, nowhere to be found. I had to backtrack through the recommendation I got from TechTV to come here, and then struggle with some difficult interface choices to finally get here again.

For anyone who might actually be curious, yes I am an IT professional living somewhere in the desert jungles of Las Vegas, Nevada. I originally envisioned this as a place for me to vent my usually minor frustrations about the world, throw a few of my opinions concerning computers and software out there, and generally feed my ego on the idea that maybe one or two people might actually read what I have to write.

I am called upon to be creative and thoughtful on the job, sometimes my errant ideas get in the way and I need to purge them before I can get to what needs to be done. Somehow the idea of "binge and purge" seems to fit well with the concept of "Weblogging."

Of course I am blogging "on the clock." I need frequent breaks between writing custom applications and helping people with their various IT needs and issues. If I cannot reflect and amuse myself in this way, I'm relatively certain I'd lose my mind somewhere (you haven't seen it, have you?).

It is comforting to have anything that resembles a job in a time when the IT industry (not to mention the whole employment economy of the U.S.) is in such turmoil and transition. I am grateful to be a sub-contracted temporary vendor (on a long-term contract) for an undisclosed part of local government, but one does harbor wishes, dreams, and aspirations for something a little more consistent (with benefits and a retirement too).

A look at my past career choices is a shmorgasbord to say the least. I have been all over the map. I served honorably in the U.S. Navy, I went to college to become a teacher, I worked helpdesks for ISP's and Dell Computers, I've been a field technician for a national pharmacy chain, I've been a field technician for Dell, Gateway, and Compaq. The hits just keep on rolling. It's a lot of "hit-or-miss" contract work that often leaves me at the mercy of people making decisions thousands of miles away.

Some days I feel like everything just gets lost in the translation.

Where was I?

TANSTAAFL!

© 2004, J.S. Brown

2004-03-19T13:56:00.000-08:00

What the Right Wing is Saying by what it Does

1. It is far better to pass ineffectual laws that look good in the press than it is to refrain from passing anything but effective laws that get the job done. Perception is everything.

2. A government’s profit is supposed to go to the people; therefore it is ok to spend more money than they take in (and offer tax breaks to the wealthy at the same time).

3. It is ok for some Americans to go without as long as the majority of Americans appear to be comfortable.

4. The best way to affect domestic tranquility is to spend the majority of our resources elsewhere.

5. Give the wealthy tax breaks and they will be more inclined to share their good fortune with everyone else.

6. It is acceptable to loosen or disregard regulations that might restrict short-term profits without any regard for long-term consequences (we can always call for “more study”).

7. Might (and the majority) makes right.

8. It is ok to sink billions of dollars addressing the effects of social problems while completely ignoring their causes.

9. Laws should reflect our specific morality, not equality (if you don’t agree, get out you atheist, disloyal pinko, traitor!).

10. It is perfectly acceptable to bribe other countries to be our friends (while they are looking for the opportunity to stab us in the back the moment our heads are turned).

11. It is perfectly acceptable for us to go against international agreements, treaties, and laws, if we don’t agree with them.

12. We really don’t care too much about public education (after all, our children go to private schools).

13. It is ok for us to lie about foreign governments and to invade their sovereignty so long as our overall cause is righteous.

14. If we must, we will use emotionalism, personal attacks, and moral outrage, to discredit, diminish, and destroy anyone who opposes us.

15. We will embrace “family values” so long as it keeps the peasants happy.

16. Pithy slogans with appeals to emotion which are easy to remember, remains our most effective marketing strategy for control over the masses.

17. If the current bureaucracy is unable to accomodate our grand designs, we will create new bureaucracies to control the old ones. The sky is the limit (so long as we're spending your money and not ours).

TANSTAAFL!

© 2004, J.S. Brown

A Downpour in the Desert

2004-03-19T13:43:00.000-08:00

Recently, my wife bought a newer car and I “inherited” her 1995 Honda Accord (this is a good thing, since the red ‘90 Honda Civic I had been driving was small, and slowly dying, and the newer car is blue, my favorite color). One of the things I got with the car was a new set of wiper blades. I have never quite understood why car manufacturers make their windshield wipers so complex that it takes a rocket scientist and a roomful of engineers to get them attached. I managed to snap the end off the driver’s side blade. I didn’t think much of it at the time, after all, this is Vegas, and it hardly ever rains in Vegas!

Of course this does not mean it never rains in Vegas. Case in point. Over the last few weeks, we’ve had rainy days about a third of the time. The tip of my wiper blade fell off at some point, so half of my wiper blade was working fine, the other half sort of “slithered” across my windshield, leaving the area I generally use to see covered in water.

I tried to endure it, rationalizing to myself: “The rainy season will be gone soon.” Of course, last night about 10:00 PM, it started raining steady. When I got up at 5:00 AM, it was still raining. Going to work with a sloshy windshield was more than I could bear.

The only place open at 5:30 AM in my neighborhood is Wal-Mart, so reluctantly, I made the trek. The store is in the middle of being converted from a retail store into a Super-Center, so there was all sorts of interesting things going on, but I made my way back to where the wipers were, quickly determined the right size, and made my purchase. So desperate was I, that I probably bought the most expensive single wiper blade in the entire store.

It’s still dark out, it’s still raining, but at least I parked under a pole light. I begin the arduous process of trying to figure out how to connect this wiper blade in the rain. After about 10 minutes of no-go, the pole light above me goes out. I whip out my trusty Mini-Magä flashlight and continue my struggles. I’ve got the hieroglyphics that pass for instructions more-or-less pasted to my hood by the rain.

Finally, I manage to attach the blade. After a total of 30 minutes, I have my triumph over adversity, my wipers gracefully whisks the water off the entire viewing area of my windshield once more. I am elated, I am wet, I must now battle the hoards of cars on the wet streets of Vegas, but at least I can see.

TANSTAAFL!

2004-03-19T13:37:00.000-08:00

Unions--Marriage--Blah Blah Blah!

I am of the opinion that if there is a moral component to the definition of "marriage," it should be up to the people getting married to figure that out.

The Social Contract should never be utilized as an ultimate instrument of morality. It remains a contract of our obligations as citizens to our government and our government's obligation to us. When we start attempting to use it as a moral instrument, we start to degrade the purpose for which it was written: to establish freedom, justice, and equity for all Americans, not just some of them.

If religious institutions wish to limit who they will or will not marry, it is their right to do so as private institutions. The government is obligated to treat everyone the same and not to become overly involved in the individual moral decisions of it's citizenry, but to protect their right to reasonable self-determinism.

When I say "reasonable self-determinism," I am allowing for the fact that we do NOT live in a democracy, rather a democratic republic. We do not have absolute freedom to do anything we wish without reprocussions or consequences. There is an established body of laws that attempts to protect everyone from harm caused by the negligence or deliberate actions of another. These are reasonable provisions for which we all must give consent as citizens. Should we choose not to, we will find ourselves behind bars.

Reasonable self-determinism, does not give the government or anyone else the right to determine consentual adult behavior. Anywhere that our legal system has done this, they have done it at their own peril. We have seen the legacy of prohibitive legislation-ignorance of the basic rule of economics: if there is a demand, there will be a supply. Along with this, we have seen a society that is far more eager to attempt to stop the effects of harm rather than face its causes.

There is little doubt in my mind that homosexuality is deviant behavior. There is little doubt in my mind that it goes against the basic laws of nature for the purposes of procreation and survival of the species. However, there is also no doubt in my mind that there will always be enough people who find the opposite sex as appealing as ever, men and women will pair off as they have since the dawn of time, and babies will continue to be born "the old fashioned way," despite the doomsayers who are so terribly threatened by what other consentual adults do with their lives.

It is not up to the government to arbitrate what is moral or immoral outside the clearly defined boundaries of the Social Contract. It is up to the individual citizen to make those determinations for themselves. Anything less and we are unwittingly exchaging our Social Contract for "Social Engineering."

TANSTAAFL!

© 2004, J.S. Brown

Lost Causes

2004-03-19T13:33:00.000-08:00

"He used to say that lost causes were the only ones worth fighting for."

Jefferson Smith - Mr. Smith Goes to Washington

I do not know how to begin such a thought as this, so I can only begin it with the words I find right here and now. There are some serious problems with our nation; we have lost perspective on what is really important. It didn't happen overnight, it was a gradual situation that happened because we started to become more worried about those things that affect us personally and less about those things that affect our neighbors and strangers we've never met. Maybe this was because the world suddenly got thrust into our living rooms and we didn't know how to deal with how much of it there really was. Maybe we saw all the suffering going around us and felt we couldn't do anything about it, so the best we could hope for was to take care of our own.

Whatever the reasons, the cause has been clear: our country is no longer run "...For the people, by the people," it is run for the elite by the elite. A distinct and separate class of individuals who shape policy and opinion like master craftsmen. They do it quietly and subtly, so as not to alarm us. It is like a game of tennis, where the crowd follows the little yellow ball as it is batted across the court. When the ball is in the far court, we're not watching what's going on in the opposite court.

You see, every year, there are things we become aware and concerned with. These "issues," they take over the airwaves, they fill our publications, and they permeate our collective consciousness. We look at these issues and determine how we feel about them, of course our feelings lead us to make a choice, to take a stand, to rise up and be heard. But then we find out that if we want our beliefs, thoughts, and feelings to be heard, we have to join one of two groups who hold a monopoly on the political machine of our nation.

Oh, there are third and fourth groups out there, but they are essentially "locked out" of the process, the rules require them to gain enough majority votes to be heard, and because the other two have become so habituated into our lives, these alternative choices are never given a fair hearing, the same system that makes the rules is the same system forbids it, and the people are oblivious to this fact. So we must choose one of two groups that "best fits" what we believe our ideals, beliefs, values, and feelings to exemplify. We may have to compromise with some of them, because there is no "perfect fit," but by and large, one of these two groups will cover the majority of how we have chosen to live our lives, and we are able to give them our allegiance and loyalty.

These two groups, they are masters of disguise and deception. They know exactly how to tell us what we want to hear, while simultaneously outraging and angering their opposites. These groups aren't our friends, they are con artists and the American people are the marks. They aren't there to solve social problems or make us safe, they are there to keep us angry and at each other's throats. They use our prejudices, our beliefs, our feelings, our values, and our thoughts as a method of turning the people against themselves. The one thing they truly fear is that some day the people will awake and realize that they've been cruelly manipulated, they will put aside those differences that keep them separate and rise up with one voice and shake the very foundations of the corruption, greed, and vice that has so entangled it's roots in our corporations and capitols.

That voice shall pierce the armor they have placed before them and force them to respond to our demands. We have lost this voice over the years, we have been taught not to question, to go about our business. We have been burdened with more and more toil so that those who have placed themselves above us can maintain their positions. We have to work harder and harder to maintain what little we've managed to scratch out for ourselves while those who have reshaped this country's image continue to pillage, plunder, and strengthen their defenses. It is very much like the move The Matrix, where people are so "...hopelessly dependent on the system..." that they will help fight to defend it from anyone trying to show them the truth. They have been programmed and conditioned by professionals to believe what they are told to believe without question or worry. They accept what they see and hear as automatons. They no longer really think for themselves, they let others do their thinking for them. Opinions are fed to them as "facts" by "loyal followers" of their cause. They trust their leadership to do the "right thing" by them; and even when these leaders fail to deliver, their followers give them loyalty none-the-less.

Everyone knows politics is a dirty business. It is made even more murky by it's relationship to religion, to corporations, and the media, all of whom may have different reasons for snuggling up to politicians, but the end result is the same: we no longer know anything that resembles "the truth." We are given "the truth" by sources that have hidden agendas behind them. Through the cooperative lens of religion, media, government, and corporations, we are told what it is we are to know, believe, feel, support, and rally against. The delicious irony of it all: the very mechanisms of mind control in our society do not have to be forced upon us; we voluntarily subject ourselves to them on a daily basis. It is everywhere we are at all times, it is the very air we breathe and echoing through the very depths of our minds, but we can no longer see it for what it is, we can only see what we want to see, what others want us to see.

Why is it that there is so much desire to "regulate" the Internet? Why is it that totalitarian states strictly control the flow of this medium into their countries? Because it is a medium that exists outside the "mainstream" of control. The Internet was invented and designed to create a functional communications network in the event of a nuclear war. Information does not travel through it in a direct path, but is broken down into "packets" that are routed according to Internet "traffic" and reassembled on the other side. If any packets get lost, they can be resent. This makes it very difficult to regulate what is being sent or received. It is a nightmare for any group or entity that wants its people to believe only what they tell them.

So-called "reputable" sources are the first ones we should be suspect of. They are all looking to survive not by serving the public interest or trust, but by making money. They are nothing more than marionettes, and the purse strings are pulled to move their mouths. We have been dreadfully misled. No matter whether you consider yourself a "conservative", "liberal", or "independent," every single one of us has been tricked into hearing what others say and responding to it with undeserved loyalty. Alas, people do not want to leave the "safety" of their status quo.

Change is frightening and change is hard to face, but if we do not find a way to take back our nation, our government, and ourselves, there will soon be nothing to salvage. All great civilizations have fallen prey to corruption from within. Sooner or later they become empty shells and collapse in on themselves. This is the direction the United States is heading. We have been silently recruited to assist in the machinations of our own demise. We are taught that unless we stand up and fight for what we are told to believe in, the "enemy" will gain total control and domination over our lives. We are provided with great "social crusades" to hold us together to their purpose, ironically, it is these things that have kept us apart.

The struggle is everlasting, the fight is never finished, when someone falls, another is raised up to take their place. Neither side can be allowed to "win," the system demands that the constant struggle be perpetuated indefinitely. It is perpetuated in very perceptible cycles, but most of us don't notice them. We are too busy concentrating on the wrong things. The illusionists hold us spellbound as their misdirection continues to keep us from seeing the truth. We are watching the fireworks in the sky, complete with "ooohs" and "aaaahs," while what we're not supposed to see goes on at ground level.

There is only one way to take back our nation. We must stand up to the bureaucrats and tell them to pack it in. We must fire our government and hire a new one, we must take back the burdens and responsibilities of being citizens true citizens concerned with the welfare and well-being of everyone, not just ourselves. We must force a separation between the greedy corporations, the media, religion, and politicians. We must root out influence peddling and campaign contributions meant only to "buy votes" on issues critical to short-term profitability and not long-term prosperity. We must break the hold of the private banks and insurance companies have over our economic well-being.

They have been allowed to dictate economic policy for the better part of a century and this has only served to benefit them, not us. We must force our government to return to being a lean instrument of the people that spends money responsibly and balances it's budget. We must bring sensible rules to taxation that do not "trick" us into believing that our getting some sort of "refund" is a bonus or dividend to our indentured service. We must look at our personal feelings, values, and beliefs and recognize that in order for us to protect them, we must also protect the feelings, values, and beliefs of many others that may not be the same as ours, for if we seek to promote our own beliefs at the expense of others, we are imposing the very kind of tyranny our nation was founded to prevent.

We must simplify our legal system until "the law" is something everyone can understand, not just people who have gone to law school (and stopped being part of the solution). We must stop fighting over education, for as long as we are so busy fighting over how and what our children should be taught, nobody can truly concentrate on teaching them anything. We must learn to accept that, while we hold to what we believe to be right, good, and morally correct, each of us has a "dark side," and we must acknowledge and face it so we can stop being silly with regards to sex, violence, drugs, and other problems.

For too long, our collective attentions have been focused on the effects of social problems without facing their causes. We cannot address a problem based upon its outcome, that only promotes addiction, a criminal underground, and overcrowded prisons. If we instead focus our attentions and energies to the source of our social problems, we can begin to discover why these things happen and correct them, rather than waiting until afterwards to try and pick up the pieces. I implore you to step outside the narrow viewpoints, the "catchy" sound bytes and slogans, and really take a good look around you. Are you happy with the way the system works? Is it truly "...as good as it's going to get?" Would you like to really make a difference instead of fighting amongst yourselves for the table scraps of people who consider themselves your betters? If you truly want to know what freedom is, if you truly want to know what our nation is meant to be about, then you have to stop taking everything you are told at face value and look deeper. You have to stop fighting over issues that are designed to keep everyone split down the middle. You have to set aside all the rubbish we have been repeatedly programmed to spout when confronting our "enemy," and realize whom the true enemy really is.

Our enemies are not threatening us from without; they are not threatening us from across party lines. Our enemies are the ones we are taught to admire and respect. They are the ones who give speeches and say pretty words we like to hear. They are people we think we "elected." They are the ones who decide how our money is spent. They are the people who determine how our nation will deal with the rest of the world. They are the people who set policies that affect our quality of life. They are the people who protect the powerful and rich at the expense of the powerless and poor. They are the people who can be bought and sold on a whim. They are the people who create the social injustices and then pretend to solve them so we will look up to them and praise them. They are the people who keep us trapped in the illusion of what we want to believe is true. They use our beliefs, our myths, our emotions, our desires, our hopes, and our dreams to manipulate and control us.

We have given up our freedom for their chains and we have locked ourselves up in their prison willingly. When we believe what they tell us and repeat it to others, we are perpetuating their lies and their gossip as if it were gospel. We are unwitting pawns in their eyes and their game. They have tricked us into doing most of their dirty work for them and we beg for more. If this is how you choose to live your life, so be it. I choose free will. I choose the right to take back the responsibility of being a citizen of the greatest nation on earth. I choose to speak out against political corruption, fraud, waste, and abuse wherever it may be, not according to "party lines," but according to higher principles. I will no longer let the propaganda of one side or the other affect how I make my choices. I will instead weigh the issues myself and make an informed decision. I will stop being an unwitting source of one-sided truth. I will embrace everyone holistically instead. I will pay attention and question every source of information I access.

I will recognize that there are no sources of information above reproach, that all of them have a hidden reason for saying what they say. I will seek compromise where I can, and work together with those who disagree with me to find a solution that best suits everyone's needs, not just mine. I will remember that this is a nation full of wonderful diversity and variety, and that is a strength, not a weakness. I will not let my efforts continue to support a privileged few while others suffer the indignities of hopelessness. I will show compassion, not pity to all those who need a hand up, not a hand out. I will provide everyone with the same basic rights, because separate but equal is not equal.

I will expect that everyone be given an equal opportunity to excel, not by quotas or unfair adjustments, but by promoting merit. If a person wants something badly enough, let them earn it, not expect it to be doled out. That only serves to weaken the whole system and preserve the current class distinctions. We cannot change this nation by allowing the current system to continue, we can only change it by waking up and sounding the alarm. The cherished "American way of life," has been hijacked, and we cannot get it back by remaining passive slaves sworn to one party or another.

We must unite for the sake of all Americans, not just some of them who happen to agree with us. The time is now for us to speak with one voice. If we choose to remain asleep, we will lose that voice forever. It will be drowned out by the powers that be. They will continue to feed us what they want us to hear and we will haplessly thank them for it. If this nation stands for something worth believing in, if it stands for something worth fighting for, then we must stand up and believe, and fight, and win. I am just one voice, but I have spoken. We can make a difference if we truly want to. We can change the face of this nation and we can make a difference in the world, but we cannot do it separately, we must do it together.

TANSTAAFL!

Selling the Extreme as the ONLY CHOICE

2004-03-19T13:31:00.000-08:00

We are a culture of extremes. Right, left, black, white, theist, atheist, this, that. Everything has to be measured by where you “fit” on the spectrum. If one expouses one point of view, they are quickly categorized, labeled, and dismissed according to that point of view. Our culture constantly extolls the virtues of taking a stand on topics and issues, and we make fun of anyone whom we percieve to be “sitting on the fence.” Anyone who is seen as a moderate is considered weak, because they cannot make up their minds and join the rest of the crowds on either end. However, your position puts you at one end, you will be generally accepted by that end and generally rejected by the other end, and visa versa.

The topics and issues which separate these two spheres are many, but they center around only a few themes- political, social, and moral. Some “overlap,” other do not. Generally accepted stereotypes are quickly gathered up and applied without mercy. Examples:

· All liberals are/are not socialists

· All conservatives are/are not rich and greedy

· Anyone who disagrees with the current administration’s foreign policy isn’t being patriotic

· Homosexuals are/are not immoral and wrong

· Abortion is/is not murder

· All religions except the specific sect, denomination, etc I belong to are wrong

· Anyone who believes that the recent flap over the 10 Commandments was indeed a violation of Church/State must be an atheist.

· Those who do not believe the U.S. is/was/always has been a “Christian Nation” is a traitor.

These are just some of the general assumptions being thrown back and forth in a constant game of tug-of-war between extremes. They are merely kinding for the fire. They keep the extremes embroiled in a constant struggle over who is right and who is wrong, who is the “winner” this time around, and who is the “loser.” It is a perpetual melodrama that never really gets resolved, very much like the soap opera.

If I were in charge, I would want to keep these sorts of controversies going. I would want people to be fighting amongst themselves over issues that will come and go and come back all over again. I would want them distracted, divided, and unable to see “the big picture,” because it means myself, (and my cronies), could pretty much get away with anything we wanted. So long as the people remain unable to see beyond their petty differences and unite, the people in power will find themselves able to get away with all sorts of shennanigans.

The power of politics, of the media, and of our disagreements is the power of misdirection, and distraction. It is the power of keeping the masses riled up, and perpetually tuned into the wrong stations. As long as the waves of misperceptions, misrepresentations, hysteria, and emotionalism and soundbytes keep pounding the shores, people will remain in their comatose states believing that their stance is the only one, and any compromise is wrong.

TANSTAAFL!

Where Urgent Urges Merge

2004-03-19T13:04:00.000-08:00

Where's the fire? Whose having a baby? What's the freaking rush? People are in such a goddamn hurry these days that they don't even have time to realize there are OTHER PEOPLE around them? What's up with that?

Driving to work is an adventure in "Sin City." Vegas has grown so big, so fast, that the roads aren't adequate to contain all the traffic. So of course, they are doing what has failed in every other big city-widening the roads. It seems like every single route I would take to work is under construction.

Can anyone tell me why people stay in a lane when the big orange signs say: "LANE CLOSED AHEAD: MERGE NOW MORONS." But people figure they can "squeeze" ahead a few more car-lengths and merge at the last minute, which only makes the whole mess thatcongestede conjested and slow. They wait until the cones are starting to angle out and that big sign is flashing ">>>>" or "<<<<<" before they're inspired to merge. I often intentionally lag back a few car-lengths in anticipation of those schmucks who make the "last minute mad merge dash" (had a jerk pull out from directly behind me, pass me on the right, and pull in front of me today, what a freaking idiot! Oh, he advanced an entire car-length. That means he'll get where he's going a second or two ealier).

Of course all sorts of people start bailing out on the side streets. The idea of only moving 10 miles an hour for a few miles is absolutely abhorrant to people. I figure that the time it's going to take me to re-route is about the same time I'll spend hanging right where I am. Why bother? I'm still going to get where I'm going. I may as well relax. What's the use of stressing over it?

This isn't to say that I never stress about getting things done, just that I've discovered there is a way to remove a lot of the urgency from my day: I just add an extra half-hour or so to the time I leave the house. I need to be at work by 6:30, it takes me 25 minutes or so to get to work, I leave by 5:35. Invariably, when I run into construction, I've got the time. I'm relatively certain this isn't a revelation to anyone, but giving yourself a little "cushion" so you don't have to rush isn't such a bad idea, the life you save might be mine, or even your own!

Irony on the rocks with a twist...

Irrational Doom: How U.S. Drug Policy continues to do more harm than good

TANSTAAFL!

To suffer the fate of the Foolish

TANSTAAFL!

Bush Turns Iraq into Political Albatross

TANSTAAFL!

It’s a Brand New Day: Big Pharma, Big Promises, (and those little White Lies in the fine print)

TANSTAAFL!

Presidentially Yours – A Rant: The American Middle Class gets taken for a ride…Again

TANSTAAFL!

The People have spoken, and President Bush still isn’t listening

TANSTAAFL!

Keeping Our Eyes on the Ball; as yet another Political Scandal Rocks Congress

TANSTAAFL!

Blowing in the Wind: The Bush Government Lets Us down about 9/11 Dust

TANSTAAFL!

Tipping the Scales: Requiem 9/11/01

TANSTAAFL!

Foiling Terrorist Plots Isn’t Good Enough

TANSTAAFL!

Had Enough Yet?

TANSTAAFL!

Taking Bush to Task on the Economy

TANSTAAFL!

Bush’s Tragic Errors and Comedy of Terrors

(Just Whose Government is it anyway?)

I would rather die a free man than live one moment as a slave to fear. -TANSTAAFL!

TANSTAAFL!

The “Bigger Picture Tube:” Faux News is Nothing New

TANSTAAFL!

Good Night, and Good Luck: Edward R. Murrow, and the Decline of The "Free Press" in America

TANSTAAFL!

Essential Political, Informational, and Alternative Media Website List - 2006

TANSTAAFL!

Mr. Bush, Get your "Business" out of My Government!

TANSTAAFL!

Fiscal Irresponsibility-By the Numbers

TANSTAAFL!

That the powerful play goes on, and you will contribute a verse.

TANSTAAFL!

In Praise of Periodicals

TANSTAAFL!

Finding a Needle in a Stack of Needles: The “Googlization” of the World Wide Web

TANSTAAFL!

Confessions of a Reluctant Mathematician

TANSTAAFL!

Done with Mirrors: The Impossible Paradox of Public Education

The Outside Looking In – Societal Perceptions

The Inside Looking Out – Teacher Perceptions

TANSTAAFL!

Juxtaposing Notions, Or The Legacy of Government Bureaucracy, the Internet, and the Future of Information Networks

TANSTAAFL!

Bye-Bye Miss American Pie: Dubya's Dystopian Wet Dreams

TANSTAAFL!

Art, Evolution, Relativity, and so Much More

TANSTAAFL!

Marking Time

TANSTAAFL!

Bizarre Love Triangle

TANSTAAFL!

Bolero

TANSTAAFL!

Doom 3: Like Quintin Terantino’s Movies; Back to the Beginning with a Whole New Finish

TANSTAAFL!

Cake and Eat it Too's

TANSTAAFL!

Veteran for John Kerry

TANSTAAFL!

I've Got Your Back John Kerry!

TANSTAAFL!

Fallout: Fahrenheit 9/11 Part 2

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Fallout: Fahrenheit 9/11 Part 1

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July

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The Laws of Propaganda

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The Soul of our National Spirit

I would rather die a free man than live one moment as a slave to fear.
-TANSTAAFL!